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View Full Version : I'm struggling with college, and I still live at home!


AnonymousMarie
Oct 6, 2011, 02:35 AM
What I mean by this is I'm use to everyone saying that to leave your house to be a college freshman, you have to cope with being on your own all of a sudden and all the various factors that are involved. I however, still live at home. I go to a local community college, and even though I'm looking for a job, I'm not employed. My parents are supportive of me financially, but not so much emotionally. I'm a fairly smart cookie, and finished half of my associates in high school, so I only need two semesters at my college. With that said, my parents simply don't listen when I say I'm struggling with my classes, and only get mad at me for bad grades. I probably wouldn't have had such academic problems, but my college received damage in the Eastcoast earthquake, and though I had originally picked all in-class classes (the only learning style that I can actually grasp without a doubt), two of my classes where transformed into hybrids and one became an online class all together. This is extremely detrimental for me, because in my high school, you were lucky to use a computer. So I'm missing assignments a lot more than could ever be acceptable. My main problem is that I have struggled with a mild depression most of my life, and struggling academically sends me into multiple panic attacks. My parents will not let me receive treatment though. They tell me to suck it up and deny anything is wrong. I've got no financial means to seek help for myself, but I'm overwhelmed, and it's a negative cycle. I'm looking for advise on what to do.

joypulv
Oct 6, 2011, 03:04 AM
Hi Marie, I'd like to separate out each part of your question, even though they go together.
1 - Living at home while going to community college is pretty much the norm these days in tough financial times, and there's nothing to be ashamed about there. It's too soon to start listening to people telling you to cut apron strings. If you were sitting around the house doing nothing, that would be different.
2 - If you selected in person classes that were switched to online, you should get a special grade credit from the administration, even if you have to pound on a few desks to get it. Explain the lack of computers in high school. Especially if tuition wasn't free. You should get what you paid for.
3 - Lack of emotional support from parents (while having all sorts of expectations of you!) is something I can relate to personally. I too found that it created an underlying depression, a sense that none of it was meaningful or worth doing. It can be a lifelong struggle to find a reason to do anything on your own. I do happen to enjoy learning and knowledge and new discoveries and inventions. I hope you do too. But I have the luxury of being old and far removed from college days and can learn what I want when I want.
4 - Try not to fall into the 'unloved child trap' of staying at home or near home hoping for that warmth you will never get. When you can get away, do so, and get love from friends instead. Make them your family and meaning in life.
Good luck. Answer back anytime, and maybe even answer similar questions to yours, since you are not alone.