View Full Version : She loves me but she is not in love with me
mastersource
Oct 1, 2011, 06:10 PM
My girlfriend just told me she loves me but she is not in love with me. We have been dating for 6 years now and have been going through some hard times that are based off her family. She and I are both 24 and are getting ready to move on with our lives but her parents still want her to be there little 10 year old daughter. We are working through that but just the other day she told me she loves me but is not in love with me and has cheated with another guy who is moving far away from here. The cheating consistent of hand holding and snuggling, now I know to many that would not seem cheating but to us holding hands and snuggling is very a special bond a person can have if they are doing it right ( which she admits she had when holding his hand). We have agreed to take a break so she can get over her new crush (love) and try to work on our relationship afterward. I know I will be able to trust her again because she screwed up bad and she is going through a lot right now with her family. She admits I make her happy but she feels that she has lost the spark. Any ideas on how to get that spark I feel back in her? The cheating was just a onetime event.
talaniman
Oct 2, 2011, 10:00 AM
Dude, if she can't get the spark back for you herself, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with her. To be honest, if you have to talk them into being a loyal loving partner, then she ain't the one.
When they cheat or hesitate with their love, I leave 'em alone. But that's just me, and my opinion. Problems, family or otherwise is no excuse for bad behavior.
What's up with this dating for 6 years and no future plan being under way?
mastersource
Oct 2, 2011, 01:08 PM
We do have future plans and they are underway. We want to live our lives with an amount of financial and social stability and we both have a lot of schooling needed to achieve that. We are both progressing in our schooling on time and want to wait until we are both finished. With her family, she is in a very toxic environment and really can't breathe in it. When we go out things are better but her family won't leave her alone. I believe one of the reasons she did what she did was she fell in love of being so far from her family that she slipped and lusted for this guy. I know who she is and because of her family she can't be it right now, it will be hard to let go because I know when she is finally able to break out of her family she will be who I fell in love with again. I see it in her; there is nothing I can do to get her out. This is one battle she has to fight on her own.
vanheart
Oct 2, 2011, 01:44 PM
She's shown you her true colors.
With both words & actions. She's a big girl. This isn't about her parents. Don't try to analyze the reasons for cheating.
She has total control over her life, and relationships.
Your time is over w/her. Too late for plans. She's not in love w/you.
Time to get on with other things & one day you may get with someone that can truly love & commit.
They way you deserve. It takes two.
Go NC.