I've been married for 11yrs, and my husband is a compulsive liar. At the start I thought it was just to impress me, but he lies about every thing from where he bought a picture to where he lives even told someone he was wealthy and I was a solicitor, its getting worse by the day. He also steals from my purse, bank acount and our children's money boxes. He has a problem with drink and has no problem taking my car and drinks and drives, he gets to the post before I do and I can't remember the last tim I had a letter. I had the police at my door for a warrant in my name because my husband didn't pay a parking fine, I'm at my wits end and don't know what to do. He has got so much worse since he was made redundent and has been violent towards me and threatens me. Can some one please help is there any help out there for him or for me. We sleap in separate bedrooms and I just don't want to live like this anymore, and its not easy to leave when you have children and living away from your femily

Lying and stealing I follow. Then you mention a problem with drink. Could you expand on that. Do you see the drinking as the basis for the other misdeeds?

I also don't understand "since he was made redundent."

Could you also state where you are situated, I'm assuming not in US. That will be a key to locating available help?

Sorry for all of the questions. Just need a little better understanding of the elements of the problem

Sorry I live in ireland. My husband has always lied but it has gotten worse with the drinking, he lost his job 4 years ago and since then his lies drinking and abusive behaviour has gotten worst. I'm sure he has mental health issues but he won't get help and I don't trust him anymore I don't know what he's cappable off. He is out of control. And its getting to the stage I'm frightend of him, I would not leave my children unatended with him, he has never harmed them but its like he's about to go crazy.

Excessive drinking certainly causes the appearance of mental health issues and could reasonably considered a mental health issue. The escalation of abuse and lying can probably be attributed, at least in part, to the same cause.

But it is far more important to deal directly with the emergent problems and leave cause to be determined later. So the immediate problems are:

1) His behavior is unpredictable and places you in fear of personal harm and possibly danger to your children. That's a terrible way to live.

2) His drinking at the least contributes to your concerns. Is therefore one of the problems.

3) Reading between the lines, would imagine that his lack employment, stealing your money, and reckless behavior (tickets, etc) poses a financial hardship as well.

Is there anything additional you feel is pressing?

Also, what type of work did your husband do and why is he unemployed?