So I'm 19 and after graduation, I moved down to LA to live with my older brother, so obviously I'm new to everything here and don't know anyone. Anyway, my brother takes me out one night to one of his co workers kick back thing and his co-worker is a girl(jessica) who happens to be gay and so is her friend alyssa. Alyssa ends up asking me if I'm gay too and I tell her yeah, and after that, she starts hitting on me. (btw alyssa 21) so after that night she ends up adding me of Facebook and I give her my number so then she ends up txting me and after a couple days of txting we come to a point where some how we have a date for Friday night around 7. My brother on the other hand isn't really okay with this whole idea cause I guess jessica told him that alyssa is a big time party person and I guess sort of a "player" too. And I'm just like "w/e". So it comes to Friday night and alyssa texts me saying she doesn't think she can make it at 7 cause she really needs to pack the rest of her stuff up before Sunday cause after that she's leaving for dublin for a week but then asks if we can maybe hangout that same night after she gets off work cause she really wants to see me before she lives and I say "yeah thats fine." so we end up hanging out at 3 am and we end up hanging out at food 4less cause its open 24/7. So were in there hanging out and I'm tired as hell plus nervous and a little quite and acting weird but we're playing with all the toys in the toy section and eventually buy candy and like $1 dvd's and she was like "lets watch them later tonight?" and again I tell her yeah. She drops me off at my house maybe 1hr and 1/2 later and she's like "well thanks for hanging out with me" and tells me to hold on to the dvd's and candy till later that night. She did get out of the car and hug me so that was good. But later that day I text her and ask her if we're still up for watching the dvd's we bought and she says she can't cause she really needs to pack and says "maybe when I get back next week?".. So pretty much after that night, I was freaking out. I didn't think she liked me all too much and that maybe I made a really bad impression. And she also started txting me differently after that night as well with like one word responses and I didn't know what to do so I told my cousin the situation and she told me just to lay off her for a while. Wait like 3 days and if she doesn't text you, you text her and ask her how she's been. So 3 days go by and I get no text so I text her and asked how the packing went and stuff and she tells me it went well and that she didn't go to dublin after all cause she wasn't finished packing. And I'm thinking "okay, so why didn't you txt me at all or try hanging out again.." but I didn't bring that up I simple just kept dropping hints about going over there to help her pack or that I'm free these nights with nothing to do and shed just be like "okay" and "yeah soon".. So after all that I really didn't think she was all that much into me and whenever I txted her I felt like I was coming on to strong cause all I wanted was just to hangout with her again but she was always "to busy" and I was always txting her first so I was beginning to think that maybe I was annoying her too by everything. So I did everything I could not to text her. And then one day she txted me and I was pretty freakin happy but I had no idea what I should text her back so I kept bugging all my friends about what I should say, how can I NOT come on to strong and all that stuff. And I was trying my best not to be weird when I txted her and eventually she finally said "you should hangout with me and my friend kp sometime" and I played it cool and was like "yeah, that be cool, when?" and she replied "maybe tomorrow" and then that was set, tomorrow it was.. Then comes tomorrow and I have no text from her to I ended up txting her that night and asked her if tonight was still on and she says "kp forgot that she had to go to the other side of LA with her gf" and so I was like "okay, does this mean me and you still can't hangout" and she was like "i wanted to hangout with you earlier but kp had errands and right now I'm at my friends roller derby and it probably won't end till 9" so I'm just thinking that I was right she's not that into me but I replied "and then you have work at 10.. Well I'm not mad or anything so don't worry about. I guess that when I do finally get to see you again it'll be the happiest day in my life." and she replied "aww your sweet" and I didn't text her for 3 days after that. Eventually she texts me again and asks if I'm busy and I say no, so she's like "do you want to go to a hookah bar with me and kp." and of course I say yeah cause I really really like her, but that whole night we're hanging out, IM QUITE AS **** and I don't know what to say or how to act or what the **** to do. I kind of just sit there like a weirdo. So I'm thinking "i really screwed it up this time, if I thought she wasn't into me before, shes REALLY not into me now cause idk how to be cool." but kp (whos her best friend) says I'm invite to her party that which was actually just last night. And when alyssa drops me off she says thanks for hanging out with us and says to text her and stuff. So after that night at the hookah bar, I text alyssa and I tell her sorry for being so weird and quite but thanks for introducing me to kp and that she was really cool and hopefully we could hangout again and ill work on playing it cool but she never replys so I don't text her a few more days after that and she doesn't text me either, but then I get this great idea just to ask her to go watch lion king in 3D with me on the 16th but there's no response back from her, so I'm thinking that's a no and I'm all bummed and I go on fb and alyssa posted that her phones off and I'm thinking "okay, is that a coincident? O_o".. Then kp ends up txting me and asks if I'm going to the party at the end of the week and stuff and I tell her yeah and then alyssa starts txting me from kp's phone and she tells me sorry about her phone being off and I let her know that it was cool that I txted her once asking if she wanted to go watch lion king on the 16th with me and she was like "aww I'm sorry, but yeah id love too" and of course I'm like shocked and excited that she actually said yeah! So I told her I bought the tickets and that I was taking her out to eat as well and she said she was excited and that was pretty much it.. So the night before the party I tell myself to just play it cool. Stop trying so hard and just be her friend at the party, save the flirting for the 16th and just let her do her own thing at the party and if she talks to you, she talks to you. So the night of the party that's what I do, but of course I'm still shy and quite and she see's that so she's like "just relax.. Here ima introduce you too ppl" and so she takes me to this girl and leaves me there to hangout in a circle off people I don't know. So I'm just like "okay let her do her thing and just have a beer and relax" which is what I do. I get a little drunk and I'm talking to a few people but I'm still quite/shy and I go back inside to the party where alyssa and kp are at with one of there friends nessa (who just broke up with her girlfriend after 2yrs) and I guess alyssa and nessa had a thing planned that night to get it in with each other. So nessa's all drunk and kissing her and really, I'm not letting it get to me. I go out side and try talking to people again but its not working, I don't know how to act, I don't know anybody, I wish I had my friends back home with me cause then id know how to be myself. But then kp comes out back where the other half off the parties at and talks to me and I'm a little drunk so I'm like "theres no cute girls to talk to" and she says something but I can't remember but I respond "theres one cute girl, but you keep walking away" and she laughs and is like "nooo, I can't, your alyssa's.. I talked to her that night after the hookah bar and I told her you were a cutie. She told me I couldnt do anything your hers" and I was like "yeah, if she liked me" and she said "alyssa just likes to have fun when shes drunk. Its nothing. Its just how she is".. Towards the end of the party I go out front to be alone cause I really have to pee and the line for the bath room is hella long and plus I want to go home cause I'm tired but I have no ride.. Then eventually alyssa and nessa come outside cause I guess they're leaving and alyssas like "kamarin, why are you outside" and I'm just like "im waiting for my ride" and she's like "whos your ride" and I tell her jessica and she's like "come on ima make sure" and we walk inside and she holds onto my hand like she really wants to hold it. And I can actually feel like maybe she does really likes me but then we get to jessica and I sit down in the chair all drunk and alyssa leaves and I finally go home and have a terrible dream about alyssa denying me ever time I lean in to kiss her and I walk up not wanting to think or talk to anyone about what happened last night.. But kp texts me later on and lets me know that she's on her way to nessa's house cause alyssa slept over there so ovbiously her and alyssa got it in but anyway, me and kp get into a conversation and she tells me that she loves that my names spelt with a K and that she can't help but have a crush on me but tells me I'm off limits and I'm like "why" and she says cause of alyssa and so I straight up say "well thats if she really likes me.. I'm so shy around and idk what to do. I'm trying to work on it but idk if ill add up to what she wants, you know?" and she says "um, idk.. Its up to you.. If you like her then act on it if don't then.. Haha I don't really know what to say.." and the funny thing about everything that's happening in my life now, is I wouldn't ever be feeling this way towards a girl.. Feeling so lost, and stupid, and not knowing what to say, or be myself. I use to know how to talk to girls, I was always the one having a good time, you know? Talking to everyone, it didn't matter if I knew them or not, I was a big flirt and a lot off girls liked me but over the year I lost my touch and became shy and I don't know how to act anymore.. Maybe its cause I'm away from home where I knew everyone and was comfortable... And when it comes to alyssa and what happened last night with her and that other girl.. Well, I'm not mad.. Alyssa 21, she's not my girlfriend, she can do what she pleases. I think mostly I'm jealous cause it should have been me. And I know most people wouldn't deal with that stuff and move on to someone better, but the way I see it is like that and the fact is, I've been playing the shy card every time I'm around her when I should have been making moves and I'm starting to think that this is "alls fair in love and war" tpye thing. But again, I still don't know what to do. Do you think I have a shot with her? What are some tips I can use when I'm shy and don't know what to say, especial when I'm with her and her friends. She I make a move on the 16th when I take her to the movies? I REALLY NEED ADVICE. WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF THIS WHOLE THING?

I think you may need to work on finding more people to hang out with than Alyssa and her friends. It sounds like you are hanging out with people you aren't very comfortable with and hoping for something different than what she has to offer.

Do you want someone you can get to know and maybe date or are you wanting what would amount to a 'friends with benefits' relationship?

What have you done to meet more people? Are you working or going to school? Do you have any interests that can help you meet people and interact with them on a more equal footing? If not, think about find something because it can be a great way to help you learn to work around being shy.