My girlfriend and I have been together for seven years next month and over the last two months she has been staying out all night drinking more getting in shape. She swears that nothing is going on and that we will be together forever.

Last night I went to bed again she went out came home at two in the morning with this friend and told me goodnight, and that her friend was going to stay over night. When I got up for work at 6 am I went downstairs to her room, and this girl was on top of her kissing her. I stood there in disbelief and they continued to make out. I went upstairs, and showered and got ready for work and my girlfriend came up, and I freaked on her and she didn't understand why I was mad. She said it had never happened and they were drunk .

What should I do? I am a girl by the way.

You should break up with her, what is the point of being with someone who is going to disrespect you like that, whether she has had one two many or not?

Good Luck,
Javi

You and your girl friend have separate rooms? The stranger didn't take the couch?

I mean, what do you expect from TWO drunk lesbians, in bed, alone? Seems you better have a talk about bring other drunks home to sleep over. Most drunks have to be told what happened. After they sober up.

What type of relationship do you have ? Is it open are you both free to have sex with others ? Are you angry because they left you out ?

First be clear what you are angry about ?

But in a lesbian, gay, straight or any relationship, there is no license to cheat on the other. If it is a FWB or a open relationship, ( while I don't like them) that is your choice.

But if this is a committed relationship then there is no excuse.

To bring them home and cheat in the living room with you in another room, is worst of all.

Drinking is not an excuse, people still know what they are doing, being drunk just lowers their judgement.

So, you have a girlfriend, that is both a drunk and a cheat,
My opinion is easy, not hard to find better

I am sorry that you were treated this way, and I hope that you've had time to think about what went on, and what you are going to do.

I get the feeling that your shock at seeing your partner with another woman, was the culmination of a lot of bad behaviour on her part. While nobody would expect to see that type of blatent disregard for you, your home, and your relationship, to me, it is inexcuseable.

It's all too easy for her to blame it on the booze, but she managed to engage enough with another person to make arrangements to go home, and from the moment she stepped out that night, it seems like a foregone conclusion that something along the betrayal lines was going to happen.

I am hoping that whatever the issues are with her, that you will let common sense rule any decisions you make. The most important thing is to realize, at least in my opinion, that if a partner can treat you this way with so little regard, major changes have to be made.

What has happened since this 'event'- are the two of you still together?

Thanks for all the answers it helps a lot. We are not reAlly talking right now she is almost acting like I did something wrong and no we are not in an open relationship I told her I was done but its so hard I have been with this person for seven years I have nobody else and I think she knows this.. This other girl works with her and they act like they did nothing wrong. For me to just for get about by best friend is really hard to do.

I'm going to kick you butt a little bit here.

YOU are the one who has been treated horribly, and inexcuseably. If, for example, you had been subject to a verbal assault by your boss, in front of 20 peers, and he used homophobic, sexist, and derogatory words that were totally and completely uncalled for. Let's add that it has happened before, only this time it was a much, much bigger deal. You are left totally deflated, embarrassed, humiliated, and broken.

What would you do. Pretend it didn't happen? Look the other way? Let's say he pushed you up against a wall and screamed every word in the book to describe who you are and why you deserve no less than what he's giving you.

Would you, as a person, as a woman, as a gay woman, accept this behaviour or, would you stand up, brush yourself off, and remove yourself from the situation. There is no hope the boss will ever change; it is you that has to change. Raise that bar, find another job.

Demand that you be treated as an equal, not a being worse than pond scum. Expect of others, that which you allow them to expect from you. Honesty, boundaries, manners, self assurance, confidence, and respect.

And that is how I see the situation you are in now. As much as it hurts worse than being kicked in the stomach, run over by a mac truck, and hit in the head with a frying pan, you must find your way in this situation, and muster up all that is good and honourable about yourself, and treat yourself with enough respect that you leave, and not accept that which has been done to you.

I thought about your situation during a 4 hour drive today, and wondered what I would do, should anyone treat me that way. All I can say is, I have walked for far less, than what you have suffered through.

For me to just for get about by best friend is really hard to do.
Best friends don't cheat!!

Dump her a$$.