PDA

View Full Version : I need advice


Lostmommy
Aug 9, 2011, 02:22 PM
Short and sweet. I am 11weeks along.the father wants me to have an abortion. I really don't want to. Am I supposed to because he doesn't want anymore children or do what I feel is right? We both have other children just not together. Not sure if we would even be married in the long run. I think he's playing games. Someone please help! Let me add this 1) the condom broke and 2) I don't need anyone complaining about being a baby killer I already know what an abortion is!

Lyra123
Aug 9, 2011, 02:34 PM
If you do not want the child, please give the child up for adoption. You should do only what you think is best. This is your decision to make. I will not lie, I am very much so against abortion, however it is your choice.

What do YOU want to do?

Lostmommy
Aug 9, 2011, 02:38 PM
I don't want an abortion! My situation isn't the best of them I have seen worse yes but mine is at the top of being pretty messed up.
I know I can't do adoption as I would want to keep the baby after carrying it. I really need help and don't know where to turn. In all reality I know I should not have my baby but I just can't see myself having the abortion.

J_9
Aug 9, 2011, 02:42 PM
If you can't have an abortion or give it up for adoption, you have but one choice.

How else can we help you?

Lostmommy
Aug 9, 2011, 02:50 PM
Very true. I guess what I am looking for was if I am "in the wrong" if I keep
The child. I do not know his family as he doesn't know mine. I do not know his children as he doesn't know mine. I am not sure if this relationship will even go anywhere (I hope it does) let me also add this would be my 7th yes 7th child! Again I was using protection now do you understand why I need help?

J_9
Aug 9, 2011, 02:58 PM
I totally understand why you need help, but I'm not sure how we can help you if you refuse abortion or adoption. Can you afford a 7th child without using financial aid?

Lostmommy
Aug 9, 2011, 03:36 PM
Maybe I'm to the point where I'm looking for others to answer and make the choice for me. I know I am the one who has to do so. I'm not going to lie I may need help paying for food. That would come down later on though. I say it's just my hard earned tax dollars coming back to me. I am so lost so confused so hurt so angry the list goes on. I wish I had time to really sit and talk to someone. Maybe this was my way of venting. Thank you for listening to me. As far as help maybe I am looking for some to tell me what they would do. Not that every situation is the same but maybe putting yourself in my shoes and trying to relate.

kcomissiong
Aug 10, 2011, 02:50 PM
I am putting myself in your shoes and trying to relate, and I'm sorry but I'm going to be a little harsh. I think that you are being selfish. Why are you insisting on keeping a child that you cannot support because you can't let them go? How would a seventh child affect your other children and you abillity to provide for them? When you make your decision, you need to think about what the best thing for your child would be, and it may not be you. If you honestly cannot support another child, who from your description, will not have a supportive father, why would you keep them from a family that could. To an adoptive family, this child would be the miracle that they have been waiting for, and not just the result of a condom accident.

Whatever you decide (abortion, adoption, or to raise another child), do it with the best interest of all of your children in mind. "I would want to keep the baby after carrying it" is not a good reason to add another person to your family.

Lostmommy
Aug 10, 2011, 03:32 PM
I appreciate your input. Really I do.
You make a valid point. I do know that the father would not run and leave me high n dry. I just know he has made it perfectly clear every time we speak that there has to be an abortion done. Funny thing is he won't use the word "abortion" anyway like I said you have valid points and (not being sarcastic) I appriciate the honesty. I was looking for that.