starkidforever7
Aug 4, 2011, 12:30 AM
I think I have paranoia.. I don't know much about paranoia but what from I've read online I understand a little bit.
Well, I have these feelings that somebody is watching me.All of the time. And when I'm in school I feel like the teacher can read my thoughts and then calls on me just because I don't know the answer. Just to embarrass me.And I have to think of every single thing before I do it. Before I say something I have to repeat it several times in my head.I feel as if somebody whether it be my friends, or just random people I pass on the street, is talking about me. I'm not sure if it's just something normal that everybody goes through or its something serious. I feel like if I talk about someone or something too much people are getting annoyed, so I stop. I'm obsessed with Harry Potter and so is my friend.. and when we first met that's all we talked about. Now whenever I mentioned it I feel like she's saying in her mind how annoying I am.I have this one friend who one time I was talking about a conversation that me and my friend had and she said "Oh, going lesbian for her?" and I was taken back. I didn't even realize I was talking that much. I feel like if I say or do the littlest thing wrong people are going to document it and hate me for it.I know that's stupid but that's just how I think. I think a lot of people hate me. My brother tells me I should go die and I've come very close to it.. I blame him a lot of the time for my sadness.. I've tried telling people that I think there is something wrong with me but they just laugh in my face and tell me I'm trying to get attention. And believe me that is the LAST thing I want.. Well I could go on and on but I feel like this is already a lot to read so I'll stop..
I'm only 12 and I'm really scared.. I don't know if its normal or not..
Well, I have these feelings that somebody is watching me.All of the time. And when I'm in school I feel like the teacher can read my thoughts and then calls on me just because I don't know the answer. Just to embarrass me.And I have to think of every single thing before I do it. Before I say something I have to repeat it several times in my head.I feel as if somebody whether it be my friends, or just random people I pass on the street, is talking about me. I'm not sure if it's just something normal that everybody goes through or its something serious. I feel like if I talk about someone or something too much people are getting annoyed, so I stop. I'm obsessed with Harry Potter and so is my friend.. and when we first met that's all we talked about. Now whenever I mentioned it I feel like she's saying in her mind how annoying I am.I have this one friend who one time I was talking about a conversation that me and my friend had and she said "Oh, going lesbian for her?" and I was taken back. I didn't even realize I was talking that much. I feel like if I say or do the littlest thing wrong people are going to document it and hate me for it.I know that's stupid but that's just how I think. I think a lot of people hate me. My brother tells me I should go die and I've come very close to it.. I blame him a lot of the time for my sadness.. I've tried telling people that I think there is something wrong with me but they just laugh in my face and tell me I'm trying to get attention. And believe me that is the LAST thing I want.. Well I could go on and on but I feel like this is already a lot to read so I'll stop..
I'm only 12 and I'm really scared.. I don't know if its normal or not..