While we were at a party another girl recognized my boyfriend of 2 years and being her friends guy for the past 10 months. She told one of my friends who told me later that night. I confronted my boyfriend and he denied everything. He said he worked with the girl but that was it.

I contacted the girl in question and she told me that it was true and gave me some details too. She seems a little odd though so I don't know what to believe. For example, she explained my boyfriend as being an addiction to her and that she would text, call and drive by his house constantly and even show up to where he was without being invited. And I know for a fact that some things she is saying aren't true, but too much of what she is saying makes sense and could be true.

She also showed me texts from her phone from him that were very incriminating and were of the sexual nature. I am convinced after seeing the texts that there was something going on at some point with the two of them. My boyfriend still denies everything. He is very apologetic for putting me in the situation and not telling me about her as a friend. I don't understand how he can deny the text messages that I saw. I would rather him admit to what he did, so there could be a possibility of us moving on together.

I told him that there is just too much proof against him that unless he can prove something or admit what he did that we were over. It has been 5 days and he still won't admit it. What do I do?

I hope he does break up with you. There is no way he can prove he did not so something, that is just silly and you are being silly.

Ok, a friend of a friend, told someone who told you, yea, that is a good sourse, and this girl tells you, but the details don't match. He worked with her, so she would know him

Have you ever considered she is trying to make trouble for him and is lying to you to make you two break up.

Honestly I guess I have to guess you are perhaps 16 or so, and not mature yet, so break up and move on.

What about the text? The other girl showed her texts from him that were incriminating.

Guys have been known to send texts ( stupid of course and wrong) of varoius sexual nature to girls they know who like it or perhaps start it.

The fact this person, first saved texts that old ( which of course texts can be easily faked by those that know how) and of course they saved them for that long, and then offered to show them, I would be very suspect of it.

And in the end, the entire concept of "proving" they did not do something.

The only thing this guy could do to make this women happy is admit to it, give some gross sex details perhaps of drunken pleasure, and maybe then she would be happy ?

If he did not do it, he can do nothing but say he did not do it, At this point, she wants to believe he is guilty and most likey wants the satisfaction of proving it, making him admit it, and then feeling justified in leaving.

I have had this problem too. This is what I tell myself; If I love him and believe he is worth working it out, I will try and work past it. What you have to think about is... If he is dedicated to denying even the topic, even though there is some heavy proof, it's up to you. If you want to stay with him you have to let it go. If it bothers you too much, you have to let HIM go. Whether it happened or not is not the issue. If it did and he is lying... you have a liar. Can you date a liar? Can you get past the lie and just tell him never to do it again? I have seen so many women look the other way. If you are young.. I would move on. There are trust issues and if you ask me the text are proof. If you are over 40 then you might want to get him to grow up and be an adult. He should at least respect your need to talk about it, disprove it, or move on from it. He obviously loves you and wants to keep you or he wouldn't try covering it up. Remember, people lie when cornered. Sorry this was so long.

You can not make anyone feel or act a certain way. They most likely where there when you were crying and hurt, they most likely talked bad against him when you were.

They most likely don't believe him, and have their feelings.

Threads merged, and edited/T

Fr_Chuck, I am 26 years old and very much in love with him. You make it sound like I am the one that is being immature here. He is the one that did these things to me. My question is, I know that he cheated, but he won't admit it, why? I have the proof. He is very sorry and remorseful for what he did. He is promising that things will be completely different if I give him another chance.

We had a good relationship up until the point that he cheated. I really think he is the guy that I want to be with and that he made a mistake, so I decided to take him back. When I told my friends that we were going to try to make things work, they couldn't understand why. I'm not sure that I understand why either, except it's what my heart is telling me to do. I love him and want to be with him.

I want my friends to understand that this is my decision and they can have their opinion on it, but I don't want things to be uncomfortable when we all hang out. We (me, my friends, & boyfriend) hung out all the time before and were very close. I don't want that to change, but I don't know how to go about hanging out all together knowing they feel the way they do and that my boyfriend will be uncomfortable.

Any ideas of how I can help make this work with my friends and him?

First of all, it sounds like your priorities are all misconstrued.
A relationship is about YOU and YOUR PARTNER. That's it.
Did you ever ask him why he cheated? There are numerous reasons men cheat, and as my grandpa would say "a fed dog don't hunt." Are you meeting his needs emotionally and physicially? If so, his cheating may be a deeper issue. Just like a lot of girls are promiscuous because they feel a need to be wanted, men also feel the need to be admired and desired sexually. A lot of times when a man is an a long term relationship, he feels are though he needs reassurance from other females. For some men that reassurance is flirting, for some it is cheating. You need to get down to the root of the problem before addressing such juvenile issues as to weather or not your friends will get along with him after his infidelity.