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Going crazy
Jul 21, 2011, 02:45 AM
Please help.

I'm a 34 year old man married for the past 3 years, I have being with my wife since we were teenagers. It feels to me now that my wife is more of a best friend than anything, we don't really have much of a sex life anymore.

I meet a co-worker a little more than a year ago and what started as a friendship has now ended up with both of us being total in love with each other. When were together all we do is laugh and have a great time, our sex life is amazing.

She is in the same situation as me, she's been married for the past 3 years and has a 4 year old boy.
She wants me to move in with her and her son and I want to move with her.

I still love my wife and don't want to hurt her, but I just love this other woman a lot more.
I just don't know if it's the right thing to do.
Please help

rileymichael
Jul 21, 2011, 03:31 AM
Well first thought that comes to my mind is you only have only life enjoy it as best you can. Yes it will hurt your wife to hear these things but if she somehow fines out by seeing how you look at her or speak to this other woman it would hurt her more so. Do your best to speka to hrut an let her know easily that your feeling have changed an you still care deeply but you do not love her an in all hope she understands for all you know it may be the same for her. Do what your heart says but don't void out what your brain says.

Going crazy
Jul 21, 2011, 06:16 AM
Thanks rileymichael,
I think your right, I have told one of my friends what's going on and he says the very same thing as you.
I don't want to break my wife's heart but if I stay with her I'll break my heart.
I do think sometimes its easier to live my life unhappy rather than to upset someone's else's.
Sad way of thinking I know :(

talaniman
Jul 21, 2011, 04:50 PM
Where is her husband? Boy are you an idiot, your wife being your best friend is a great thing, and the sex life ain't so great because life has gotten in the way, and you have yet to figure it out. So any attention, and more sex than you were getting is great, but you have yet exhausted the lust with this co worker, as you have with your wife. Once the lust is gone and the newness has faded, you probably will be a lot worse off than you were before.

Not to worry, once your wife finds you to be a lying cheater, she will boot you to the curb anyway, and you can go enjoy the new girl for however long that lasts. Then in 3 years you both will be tired of each other and the cycle starts again.

At least be man enough to be honest with your soon to be baby mama, and stop letting her think you are a good guy, and an honorable family man.

JohnDaman407
Jul 21, 2011, 10:59 PM
Taliniman is right!! Don't get caught up in the moments... you are just being crazy in action!
I think is best that you tell your wife how you feel than let things go from there.

Enigma1999
Jul 21, 2011, 11:26 PM
You know what really bothers me? People who lie and cheat on their "best friend"!

Be a man and tell your wife the trurh. I feel bad for her AND the husband.

I would NEVER cheat on a man! Not even close.

You want advice? Tell your wife that you're a moron!

kcomissiong
Jul 22, 2011, 06:20 AM
Harshness Coming Up...

You love your wife, but you are so selfish that you would violate the vows that you made to her, destroy her trust in you and your relationship, and tear apart your home life? Not to mention that you are so horrible that you would contribute to the destruction of another family's home and a CHILD'S stability. You are the worst kind of person and you have the nerve to feel sorry for yourself because you are unhappy?!

Tell your wife. She had the right to know the truth about the horrible man she committed to. She had the right to make a choice about whether she wants to stay in a marriage with the lying, cheating, homewrecker she thought was her best friend. Stop being freaking selfish, and actually think about your wife and her needs. She needs a genuine man who is honest, loyal, committed, and truly a partner in life. You are NONE of those things. Let her make a choice about how much of your BS she wants to live with. You owe her a lot more than that, but at least give her that much.

mj808
Jul 22, 2011, 07:41 AM
Guess what, all that newness with this other woman will fade. Its fun to play house with her for a while and get some but wait till reality sets in. Wait till you have to live with her, be her child's new father. Sex ebbs and flows.

Relationships are not all laughter and sunshine and you should count yourself among the blessed that your wife is more than tolerable. She is your best friend. You don't think she misses great sex? Did you even bother to talk to her about it before you started this affair?

You should fess up and let the chips fall where they may. If she leaves than maybe it's a good thing for her, she deserves to be loved completely by someone.