taratee
Jul 20, 2011, 08:55 PM
Recently (4 days ago) me and my boyfriend of over two and half years broke up. We are both 20 and we met on facebook( we live in the same town and have mutal friends so it wasn't creepy or anything when we first met). Anyway there are several reasons we broke up:
-My family hate him and wishes to never see his face again because they believe that his family has taken advantage of me because they asked me to register two cars in my name because apparently they had too many tickets in their names to register them(or so they say). Anyway one of the cars was in a accident which I didn't even know it was being driven( it wasn't supposed to be driven)and if anyone was hurt I could have been held legally liable( no one was hurt thank god). Anyway my parents were pissed to hear about this and were mad I even registered two cars in my name in the first place and his parents just blew this incident off as nothing( they said they would have protected me if anything had happened but nothing did so I shoudn't have flipped out like I did). I felt as if I had to registered these two cars because my boyfriend does a lot for me and in a way convinced me to do so. I regret this the most and we would probably still be together if he had not asked this of me.
-His family has relations to very well known gang members which I did know about but was never a huge deal to me because me and him were never involved in it. Well a few days ago my mother googled his fathers name and found this blog about a bunch of illegal activity and how his dad was invloved and I was even mentioned in the blog for registering a car( My name wasn't used but she knew it was me). The blog has about a paragraph maybe a paragraph and a half about his dad and the rest about the gang. My mom flipped out basically saying that his family was bad and that even though my boyfriend wasn't he would always be around it and involved in it regardless of our relationship and forced me to break up with him because she felt I was in a bad position.
-My boyfriend bought me my second car because he said that my first one was unsafe which was nice of him because I got a free car out of it... little did I know it had so many problems which stressed me out(Im a student and can't afford to fix or buy a new car) anyway after about a year the car got in an accident and we both decided that the repair cost were to high so he told me I could make payments on his old 2004 BMW which when I got this car had all the lights on it and even when he fixed most of the stuff it still wasn't road worthy. I paid $350 a month for this car and it needed new ball joints($450), powers stering pump($1200)as well as the summer tires put on($250). My boyfriend did agree to pay for all of this but at the time was switching jobs and was broke so he told me I could fix it myself or stop complaining( I can't afford to fix it and make payments).
-He didn't like my friend which did make me feel a little upset. At the beginnning of our relationship he hung out with them once or twice but after that he didn't want me going out with them to clubs or anything.
-At the beginning of our relationship I was treated like a princess( we went on two vacations both of which he paid for cause he owned his own company at the time) He would take me out on dates and everything but towards the end of our relationship he would never take me out( I would even offer to pay) and never wanted to go anywhere just stay at home and watch TV and do nothing which did bother me.
- I also paid and lent him a lot of money (what I consider a lot of money cause I am a student and have to pay for some of my fees which are expensive) I lent hime 600 for his truck which I never got back. I bought him very expensive birthday presents ranging from $400 to $800 dollars (on my last birthday he said he was too broke to buy me a birthday present but had purchased a seedo two months ago and the birthday before that I didn't get any presents only a surprise party which I really didn't want because all of my friends were out of town so it was basically his friends. We went away on a trip I paid for the cabin rental($270) plus another $300 in expenses. I also would constantly buy us takeout dinner( we both work late) or bring food from my work so like $22 4 or 5 days a wee which adds up. I know a relationship is not based on money but this did bug me a little but I thought because he had been so great to me in the relationship at the beginning I should be good back.
-Before we broke up we rarely saw each other I worked night from 4 -12, 1, or 2 and he worked days from 6 to 4 so we literally maybe saw each other once a week but we would leave notes or talk on the phone etc.
I still love my boyfriend so much and even though all of this has happened I still have the urge to be with him. I miss him and am very upset that I let my mother end it on her terms and not my own. I feel like I've made the wrong choice and I completely shocked him when I told him we needed to break up and he even offered to move out if it would save our relationship. Its so hard because I feel like from the start we were doomed he never graduated high school( has a grade 9 education same with his parents but they own restaurants and bars adnd are starting some TV shows) and I am in post secondary right now which sometimes he thinks is a joke which also bugs me. He also wants to get married young like 22 or 23 and have children where as I would like to have a career and then settle down at 25 or 26. I know this is a lot of information and most of it sounds bad but my boyfriend was the only perosn I felt like I could depend on. I could vent to him, I could call him when my car was broke down, he would basically have given me the world. I also started sleeping at his house every single night so now sleeping in my own bed is really hard. I really need advice on the right thing to do. I'm scared to be alone and by myself and I'm scared that what if he is the one and I will never find someone like him again and what if I don't want to. I don't want him to move on. Anyway any advice or input would be greatly helpful. Thanks
-My family hate him and wishes to never see his face again because they believe that his family has taken advantage of me because they asked me to register two cars in my name because apparently they had too many tickets in their names to register them(or so they say). Anyway one of the cars was in a accident which I didn't even know it was being driven( it wasn't supposed to be driven)and if anyone was hurt I could have been held legally liable( no one was hurt thank god). Anyway my parents were pissed to hear about this and were mad I even registered two cars in my name in the first place and his parents just blew this incident off as nothing( they said they would have protected me if anything had happened but nothing did so I shoudn't have flipped out like I did). I felt as if I had to registered these two cars because my boyfriend does a lot for me and in a way convinced me to do so. I regret this the most and we would probably still be together if he had not asked this of me.
-His family has relations to very well known gang members which I did know about but was never a huge deal to me because me and him were never involved in it. Well a few days ago my mother googled his fathers name and found this blog about a bunch of illegal activity and how his dad was invloved and I was even mentioned in the blog for registering a car( My name wasn't used but she knew it was me). The blog has about a paragraph maybe a paragraph and a half about his dad and the rest about the gang. My mom flipped out basically saying that his family was bad and that even though my boyfriend wasn't he would always be around it and involved in it regardless of our relationship and forced me to break up with him because she felt I was in a bad position.
-My boyfriend bought me my second car because he said that my first one was unsafe which was nice of him because I got a free car out of it... little did I know it had so many problems which stressed me out(Im a student and can't afford to fix or buy a new car) anyway after about a year the car got in an accident and we both decided that the repair cost were to high so he told me I could make payments on his old 2004 BMW which when I got this car had all the lights on it and even when he fixed most of the stuff it still wasn't road worthy. I paid $350 a month for this car and it needed new ball joints($450), powers stering pump($1200)as well as the summer tires put on($250). My boyfriend did agree to pay for all of this but at the time was switching jobs and was broke so he told me I could fix it myself or stop complaining( I can't afford to fix it and make payments).
-He didn't like my friend which did make me feel a little upset. At the beginnning of our relationship he hung out with them once or twice but after that he didn't want me going out with them to clubs or anything.
-At the beginning of our relationship I was treated like a princess( we went on two vacations both of which he paid for cause he owned his own company at the time) He would take me out on dates and everything but towards the end of our relationship he would never take me out( I would even offer to pay) and never wanted to go anywhere just stay at home and watch TV and do nothing which did bother me.
- I also paid and lent him a lot of money (what I consider a lot of money cause I am a student and have to pay for some of my fees which are expensive) I lent hime 600 for his truck which I never got back. I bought him very expensive birthday presents ranging from $400 to $800 dollars (on my last birthday he said he was too broke to buy me a birthday present but had purchased a seedo two months ago and the birthday before that I didn't get any presents only a surprise party which I really didn't want because all of my friends were out of town so it was basically his friends. We went away on a trip I paid for the cabin rental($270) plus another $300 in expenses. I also would constantly buy us takeout dinner( we both work late) or bring food from my work so like $22 4 or 5 days a wee which adds up. I know a relationship is not based on money but this did bug me a little but I thought because he had been so great to me in the relationship at the beginning I should be good back.
-Before we broke up we rarely saw each other I worked night from 4 -12, 1, or 2 and he worked days from 6 to 4 so we literally maybe saw each other once a week but we would leave notes or talk on the phone etc.
I still love my boyfriend so much and even though all of this has happened I still have the urge to be with him. I miss him and am very upset that I let my mother end it on her terms and not my own. I feel like I've made the wrong choice and I completely shocked him when I told him we needed to break up and he even offered to move out if it would save our relationship. Its so hard because I feel like from the start we were doomed he never graduated high school( has a grade 9 education same with his parents but they own restaurants and bars adnd are starting some TV shows) and I am in post secondary right now which sometimes he thinks is a joke which also bugs me. He also wants to get married young like 22 or 23 and have children where as I would like to have a career and then settle down at 25 or 26. I know this is a lot of information and most of it sounds bad but my boyfriend was the only perosn I felt like I could depend on. I could vent to him, I could call him when my car was broke down, he would basically have given me the world. I also started sleeping at his house every single night so now sleeping in my own bed is really hard. I really need advice on the right thing to do. I'm scared to be alone and by myself and I'm scared that what if he is the one and I will never find someone like him again and what if I don't want to. I don't want him to move on. Anyway any advice or input would be greatly helpful. Thanks