I am approaching the 4th week with no contact with my daughter.
Since January, my contact with my daughter has been limited.
Just a quick recap of my family (I come from a very dysfunctional family. My father is an alcoholic, my sister who is 10yr elder to me has always abused me throughout my childhood, my parents are fearful of her and has to do what she wants them to. My sister now is a police officer. My ex husband knowing my sad family story approached my sister and then the following drama takes place where my sister totally misused her power).
The problems started when I made an allegation of abuse against the father of one of my ex-husband’s friends.
Since then I have been accused of being suicidal, being a risk to my daughter's life, been held in custody on a charge of tress pass / violation of a trespass order that had not been served on me, had a court appearance and subsequent compulsory attendance at defensive driving school.
I have been accused of assaulting my parents. I have been accused of lying and coaching my daughter to lie.
I have been medically proved to be sane.
In the past Plunket have said I was doing an “adequate� job as a mother.
I have affidavits from friends and flatmates as to my character.
I have a witness who verifies that no assault took place on one of the occasions mentioned by my mother’s lawyer, sadly there is no witness to the other part of her accusation.
I have been subject to supervised access to my daughter. This access has been supervised by my parents. They were appointed by the court. During supervision they have left me and my daughter unsupervised, have gone to friend’s houses and my father has even returned to the house on several occasions drunk (excellent supervision when you consider they were appointed because I was labelled a risk to my life and my daughter’s! ).
My father has recently (in one of his rare sober moments) been verbally abusive and threatening to a friend of mine who I asked to attend during supervised visits to monitor my parents and myself during the visit. This has been witnessed by others and affidavits have been attested to. (I didn’t wish to have another accusation levelled at me, hence having a permanent witness around).
I have tried to provide alternative supervision, both from my friends, my ex-husband’s associates and my family, none of which have been deemed to be suitable.
I have a friend who has been contacted by my parents and was told by them that they wished to withdraw the protection order, subsequently they have decided not to. This has also been the case previously when they spoke to me about the same.
I have witnessed my daughter being distressed, sad, lonely and being called a liar and she has told me she has been slapped and threatened.
I have seen her arrive at my house dirty, exhausted, wearing dirty clothes, injured (I brought her to a doctor for treatment for bruising down her right side), I have seen her ill and be forced to attend parties that start late and finish late, way beyond what would be a reasonable bed time.
At this juncture the only constant factor that has remained has been my lack of access to my daughter .
My life has changed dramatically. I have been arrested and I am now subject to supervised access to my daughter. I presume I have a police record too. I can cope with being called a liar, being called crazy, being arrested and being accused of anything else that my family / ex- husband want to accuse me of. What I find most difficult is not being able to see my daughter.
To this end I have tried to inform anyone who may get dragged into this ugly mess that I am more than happy to comply with any direction, ruling, supervision or any other term they may wish now or at any time in the future to impose upon my daughter’s relationship with me. Should they wish to attach any additional labels to me, that too will be fine.
It has been 4 weeks since I last saw my daughter. I genuinely feel that, although a team of professionals are acting on ny daugther’s behalf, none of them have had to see their child brought to their house on a supervised visit, hungry, unkempt, injured or ill. If they had perhaps this would colour their view on the excellent care that is afforded to my daughter elsewhere.
Therefore, as I stated already I am happy to comply with whatever the courts and their officers, in their wisdom, deem to be a suitable end to me having access to my daughter, however limited that may be. At least for those few hours my daughter will be with her mother and will be well cared for.
Any help from anyone at all will be hugely appreciated. {E-mail removed}

You need a good lawyer to help you with this convoluted problem.

Yes, you need an attorney or someone to advocate for you. You need to assemble all the proofs of false allegations, document everything, then go to court and request that custody be restored, and the harassment stopped.

Thanks for your time for reading and replying. I do have a lawyer.

Any advise what are the things that I can do? I can't believe that I just have to sit and wait for the court hearing!! I want to win this so that these people can never harass me and my little one after this again, so that I can raise her without any disruptions from here on... My sister is playing in the background very safe and has got my ex-husband and my parents in the front... She needs to be stopped... Any suggestions please I will be very thankful.

Kind Regards

What does your attorney tell you?

Like I said, you document everything. But you also need patience with the court system.

Thanks Scott,
As I was mentioning I have so many cases put against me.. I have huge folders of writing both on my computer and in hard copies...
My attorney basically said that he is shocked! He is scratching his head since, everything is so abnormal... parents put a protection order against me but still come for supervised visits etc... The hardest part is my daughter coming home and telling me during those few hours supervised visits that she is being abused... If I try to approach police etc... this all can come back on me as it seems I might be trying to take revenge etc and that I am crazy etc... It is hard to know that she is suffering and not being able to do anything and been months court did not even bother to give any date and till date there is no update on when they will give one!! So, my lawyer says that I just need to keep strong and wait. The child lawyer talks down to me and my lawyer is surprised how rude and unprofessional she is. I can't aproach her!

Because my sister takes my ex and old parents as a group to speak false negative about me to child lawyer etc... I have been defamed so badly that it is even more shocking that when child lawyer or social workers come they not only have a preconceived mind but also have that "we know you and we are not interested to hear you" kind of attitude... "We are in rush, don't have much time and very negative"! These are the people who will be making reports for the judge too!

First, when posting a follow-up question or info, please use the Answer options at the bottom of the page rather than the Comments. Also please keep all discussion of this to one thread.

When I say document, you need proof. You need to prove how the accusations are false and how the characterizations don't fit. You can't just call the other liars. You have to say they said this about me, but here are the facts. And they have to be concrete facts.