I've been with my boyfriend for just over 4 months now.. We have had sex many times and I lost my virginity to him but I just can't seem to have an orgasam??
I've had a couple of operations down below to help me have sex and children in the future, could that be part of the problem..
What he does does feel good but not enough to give me an orgasam, but I do enjoy having sex with him.

Is there something wrong with me?

Can you orgasm when you masturbate?

I understand you are 19 years old? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dogs/help-583317-2.html

I don't get the same "pleasurable" feeling when I masturbate.
Yes I am.

Considering your last post to me in the dog forum, which was removed, I have to ask why you're asking for more advice. It's not like you listen anyway, so I have to wonder why you're even asking for advice you won't follow, and will instead tell someone to f off when they've given you the most accurate advice they can. It shows your maturity. Maturity and sex go hand in hand.

I'll give you another chance. Let's see if you've learned anything.

Having an orgasm means learning about your body, talking to your partner, and exploring yourself, and him. So talk to him. Tell him what you like, what you don't like, what you'd like to try and what's taboo for you.

Most women don't orgasm during sex. Our bodies just don't co-operate. Everything is in the wrong place. Orgasm is usually achieved through foreplay were women are concerned.

Bottom line, learn to please yourself so you can tell him what you like. Communicate. That's what being in a relationship is all about.

As for the dog forum, I was sick of everyone assuming they were right and when I told them they were wrong the world came to an end... and it is a urine infection by the way, I took him to the vet. It has nothing to do with the dog "being forgotten about". And my maturity is actually fine thank you, you people don't know my dog, you all talk about dogs in general I obviously know my dog. If everyone just listened to what I said and stopped bringing up things that weren't relevant this wouldn't of happened.

Anyway... I don't like to please myself because as I said I don't get the same sensation as I do when I'm having sex so I just get bored of it..

I do love having sex with my boyfriend but it usually just ends up with him having a "happy ending" and I get tired of waiting for mine.

You should in fact normally get more or better feelings when you are masterbating, And you can not even know what to tell him to do, or how to, if you can't please yourself.

And you should be reaching your peak often in the foreplay where he is bringing you to that point before the actual sex starts.

I just find having sex is a lot more pleasurable then foreplay. And I do tell him what to do during foreplay but it doesn't do it for me as much as sex

As for the dog forum, I was sick of everyone assuming they were right and when I told them they were wrong the world came to an end... and it is a urine infection by the way, I took him to the vet. It has nothing to do with the dog "being forgotten about". And my maturity is actually fine thank you, you people don't know my dog, you all talk about dogs in general I obviously know my dog. If everyone just listened to what I said and stopped bringing up things that weren't relevant this wouldn't of happened.


Just want to point out that we said it could be a urinary tract infection from the very beginning, so in fact, we do know your dog, and we were right. Just fyi. :)

Now to get to this question.


I just find having sex is a lot more pleasurable then foreplay. And I do tell him what to do during foreplay but it doesn't do it for me as much as sex

Have you ever had an orgasm? Not during sex, but just when you're masturbating? When you masturbate what do you do? Do you use toys, the shower, your fingers..

If you can't get yourself to orgasm then it's unlikely that he'll figure it out. Guys really have no idea how a woman's body works. They need directions. If you don't know where you're going on your own body, you won't be able to tell him what to do.

Have you thought about getting a sex toy together, reading up on the female orgasm, experimenting a bit?

I've never had an orgasm.. but I've also had an operation twice down there and I had to use masturbation to "stretch" that area so I'm also wondering if it's a psychological thing, like I am associating maturbation with pain and maybe that is why I get more pleasure out of sex?
We've tried different positions but depending on the position it starts to hurt my stomach

I've never had an orgasm.. but I've also had an operation
twice down there and I had to use masturbation to "stretch" that area so I'm also wondering if it's a psychological thing, like I am associating maturbation with pain and maybe that is why I get more pleasure out of sex?
We've tried different positions but depending on the position it starts to hurt my stomach

It very well could be that this is psychological. Once you've experience pain it's hard to put that aside and concentrate on pleasure. I'm sure that the pain is always on your mind, enough so that you can't relax and go with the moment.

I don't think that different positions are going to help. Like I said, the majority of women don't orgasm during sex. If you can't get yourself to orgasm then it's very unlikely that sex will.

I would consider talking to a sex therapist mainly because of the things you've been through. I'd also talk to your doctor to see if any of the operations you've had could be contributing to this.

For a woman orgasm is all about our mind set. If you're not in the right mind set, it won't happen. Your mind is already on something other then pleasure.

Talk to a sex therapist. I wish we could help, but seeing as this is an issue that may be psychological, there's very little we can do.

I question why a adult, presumably familiar with her body, would refer to ANY operation in this way: "I've never had an orgasm.. but ive also had an operation twice down there and i had to use masturbation to "stretch" that area ..." Sex begins to hurt her "stomach"?

Down there? No more specific than that?

I do agree that a therapist is the person to give advice.

Also, concerning the dog that pees, WG's advice was "And again, please rule out urinary problems." Guess OP didn't bother to read that particular post.

(Why do people who don't like the advice, don't want to hear the advice, come back with another question?)

I asked a different question that has absolutely nothing to do with the other one... So grow up and get over it.
I'm asking for advice because it is ruining my relationship. If you don't want to read it or help then don't.

I did rule out that post and YES HE AS AN INFECTION. READ BELOW >>

As for the dog forum, I was sick of everyone assuming they were right and when I told them they were wrong the world came to an end... and it is a urine infection by the way, I took him to the vet. It has nothing to do with the dog "being forgotten about". And my maturity is actually fine thank you, you people don't know my dog, you all talk about dogs in general I obviously know my dog. If everyone just listened to what I said and stopped bringing up things that weren't relevant this wouldn't of happened.