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messier
Jun 26, 2011, 08:26 AM
HI. IS THERE ANY WAY I CAN DISCREETLY HAVE A FEMALE FRIEND TO TELL MY FOLKS THAT SHE IS 100% OVER HER EX. For the past while I have been exchanging calls and texts with a pretty female coworker at my previous bank job. I have recently switched branches. We are technically "friends" but with some flirting going on.

I have my own apartment in Manhattan but one day while my folks were visiting last week my dad picked my cell phone and it was my friend's ex. I had called my female friend and her ex picked up. They broke up 3 years ago but is still close with her family. MY friend explained that her ex is still close and visits her family an is the jealous type. He obviously was upset that he heard a man's voice on the line. SHE assures me that the relationship is over.

My folks are old school and immediately implored me to stop speaking to this girl. I do have feelings for her and was looking forward to introducing her to my family. MY gut feeling is that her EX was just blowing off some steam. SHE has been over her EX for AWHILE. How can I encourage her to tell my folks that she is over her EX? Do you have any suggestions? I just felt her introduction to my family got off on a wrong foot. PLEASE RESPOND,THANKS

talaniman
Jun 26, 2011, 02:31 PM
I should guess that you don't be in a hurry to introduce them, since she is technically friends with some flirting. Wait until things are more concrete between you, and why should she have to explain her personal business to your old fashion parents any way?

Take this as a warning of how they will misinterpret YOUR business also, and be cautious as to how, and what you present to them. I suspect nothing you, or anyone else says to them will ever change their minds, or their feelings. Respect that, and don't try to.

HurtScorpio
Jul 6, 2011, 10:34 AM
It just seems odd to me that if she has been over her ex for awhile -3 years -why is her ex picking up her phone? Are you sure she is being honest w/you and not just telling you he is the jealous type when in reality they are still together? I would hold off on the parental introduction before I had more information because the situation does not sound serious between the two of you and it does not sound completely clear so be careful.

danielle429
Jul 14, 2011, 10:16 AM
Im sorry but I think your dad answering your phone is invasion of privacy, so to be truthfully honest them getting off on the wrong foot,was because of your dad, your parents seem to be a little overly protective more than just old school, I wouldn't that much energy into the situation as it probably will blow over. Once they finally meet and greet with her it may take time but as long as she seems to have the right intentions I think they'll let it go.

Asking her to explain herself to them maybe a bit much, she is trying to build a relationship with you first and foremost and she might think that you are already allowing your family 2 cents into something that has absolutely nothing to do with them, your opinion on the situation between her and her ex is what is truly important,so don't press the issue with her you can ask and see how it goes but if she feels the need to not offer them an explanation that is her free will and you need to understand those are your parents not hers..
Blessings in love and light

BK201
Jul 14, 2011, 11:59 AM
You can just tell your situation to her. It is up to her to decide if she has anything to explain to your folks. I don't think she has to explain herself to anyone since you both are friends.
But then again, tell her the situation, may be she will decide to help you. The answer is, talk to her openly.