My ex texted me about a family member of her's... why would she do this?

She wants to piqué your curiosity (i.e. push your envelope) and get you to respond?

Even after she's told me it's over?

Yes, especially after she told you it's over. The dumper makes up different "rules" from the "rules" for the dumpee. The dumper thinks he or she can stay in touch with the dumpee; it's an ego thing and a control thing.

Ignore the message and don't contact her, don't respond. You will be playing her little game if you respond and will end up with a messed-up head.

So it doesn't really mean she wants me back?

Yes, especially after she told you it's over. The dumper has different rules from the dumpee. The dumper thinks he or she can stay in touch with the dumpee; it's an ego thing and a control thing.

Ignore the message and don't contact her, don't respond. You will be playing her little game if you respond and will end up with a messed-up head.

No it doesn't mean she wants you back.

No, she doesn't want you back.

Can I expect her to do it again? It's been 2 weeks?

It's been 2 weeks since we broke up

I'm sure, especially if you don't reply this first time, that she will contact you again (probably more than once), hoping against hope that you will play her game. DO NOT respond!!

She has no interest in getting back together. She wants to keep control.

Trust me. I know what I'm talking about.

People over the age of 30 do this?

People over the age of 75 do this.

She is bored, and needs attention. Guess she found someone to give her some, so she may, or may not need some in the future. Ignore her.

Age doesn't matter when it comes to playing games.

Why would my X tell me she couldn't handle knowing I was with another woman

Now she's saying she couldn't handle knowing I'm with another woman... does this nut want me back?

NO, she doesn't want you back.

This is all part of the control thing. Read a book. Watch TV. Run around the block.

DO NOT REPLY!!


It's just her way of trying to get you to play her game. If you reply, you are dead meat, a total fool. She doesn't give a hoot about you.

She's driving me out of my mind Thank you Wondergirl she wanted this break up why doesn't she just let me be?

Letting you be would be no fun at all! She has to make herself feel good by torturing you. Ignore her.

Would someone who says they are indifferent to me send 3 emails to tell me?

That would depend on the content.

More details please.

Is this the girl from your previous thread?

My and my GF broke up it got nasty... after all the BS I sent a letter saying I was sorry for my behavior... I didn't hate any hatred... and I wished her well... I told her she didn't have to respond... infact I asked her not to Because I wanted her to know I was sincere... she sent me at text saying "Thanks for the letter I don't hate you ever"... That was at 6pm I didn't respond... I felt there was no need to... at 11pm she sent me an email saying "Thanks for the letter I don't hate you" again I didn't want to respond. I felt the letter was enough. Then the next day I get this long email telling me she's over me enough to be friends and that she was sort of indifferent to me... couldn't she have just said that in her first contact?

When someone emphasises certain feelings towards you in such a manner, not only are they not indifferent, but they are actually giving you a lot of attention.

Yes

This thread has been merged with his other ones, for the full background


My Ex has been calling me the past few nights, a few times in a row. I haven't answered only because I have the phone on silent so as not to wake a family member I'm taking care of. She only calls at night, why?

Well if you don't answer you'll never no
Do you have children together?
She might not want to disturb you working or take your attention away from who your looking after.
How long was you together and how long have you been separated if you don't mind me asking

We have know children, we were together almost 3 years, when I text and ask her what's up she says it's no big deal... but 3 nights in a row? Leaving no message calling a few times a night? We broke up in May

Was you living together?

No

She could just miss you and want to talk

She obviously wants to talk.

If you are ready for that relationship to be over, then you need to ignore her calls and not return them. No Contact means No Contact.

How long have you been broken up and why did you break up?

I agree with Southamerica-ignore her calls-and don't call her back.

You are in the friend zone, so she can talk to you without being your girl friend. Something to do until she finds other interests, and keeps you confused and wondering if you still have a chance to get her back.

This also keeps you from forgetting her, and getting over her, so you don't chase someone else, because you will be waiting for her to take you back. Its all about her getting the attention she needs while she heals herself, and attracts the attention of someone else. Then she will no longer have time to keep you docile, in the friend zone.

Keep ignoring her, and being unavailable to be her emotional tampon, as by now you are seeing the confusion she causes your thoughts just by calling, and getting no answer.

Just think how nutty you would be if you actually talked to her when she calls. She wants you to be busy wondering what's on her mind, and she is also wondering if you have moved on. Its an ego boost for her that you have not, and that's what she really wants to know.

Threads merged.



My X of over 2 years broke up with me over 2 months ago. She recently called me and told me she hasn't had an orgasm since we were together and that no other man has compared to me in bed. I'm not rich and live 4 hours away from her, could she be lying? And if so why?

She could be messing with you or maybe she wants a booty call. I'd tell her to get lost.

Why even worry about what she means?

And why take her calls?

She's your ex-leave her in the past.