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View Full Version : Did I do the right thing?


Maximus77
May 17, 2011, 01:32 PM
I dated my ex-girlfriend for 2 years. I can honestly say that it was the best 2 years of my life. For me, everything was great. So much so, that I was even thinking about getting engaged to her. We talked about marriage, at first she was OK with it. But when she later saw that I was serious about it, I guess she started getting cold feet which I wasn't aware of at the time. She asked me to take a course at a business school so I can get a better career which I agreed to do. Everything was fine when all of a sudden she decided to break off the relationship. I was crushed and totally confused. We never argued, I treated her like a queen and was the perfect gentleman to her. Her mom even slapped her for leaving me (yeah, her mom loved me that much!). I later found out that, since I was her first boyfriend and that she couldn't compare me to anyone else to know if I was the right one for her, she wasn't ready to settle down and wanted to date other people. She actually started dating one of my close friends which was like a double betrayal for me. That relationship went sour. Later, she started asking my friends about me and we later contacted each other. It appeared that she wanted to come back to me but never actually said the words. She kept saying that I was always a good friend to her and always treated her better than anyone. But I told her that she already knew how much I loved her and that I had nothing more to prove to her. I also said that I didn't need to her to be just my friend because I have plenty. So I asked her straight up if we were just friends or were we going to have a future together? She told me that she couldn't answer that question. So, without saying another word, I walked away. She tried to stop me and telling me that I'm her only friend but I kept walking and ignoring her and I left. That was the hardiest thing that I ever had to do because I was still so in love with her. Her best friend later told me that she knew that sooner or later my ex was going to regret leaving me because she still cared for me... I was her first love. Some time later, I started a new relationship with someone else and when the news got to my ex, she became furious, upset as well as sad and depressed. I'm still with my current girlfriend and she's great. I have absolutely no issues with her at all. But I find it odd that I don't love her with the same intensity like I did with my ex. Is it because I'm afraid of getting hurt again? Did I do the right thing by leaving my ex behind or am I still in love with her?

ken007nielsen
May 17, 2011, 04:14 PM
First things first, yes you did the right thing leaving her. She didn't want you, and had you stayed she would have used you.

It's an old chapter in a book read by many, just ignore her and enjoy your current girlfriend.

liongal
May 19, 2011, 12:54 PM
There is unfinished business between you and your ex g/f, you wanteed t go all the way, however she was unsure and needed to explore life; others a bit more before deciding. No one can blame her for that. You on the other hand done the right thing also by moving on.

However, it's clear there is unfinishedd business between both of you hence her reaction to your new g/f and you wondering why you still think about her.

Had you been single, it would have been simple to re engage with your ex. However not so simple as you have connected with someone else now.

My advice, what ever you do, consider the feelings of your current g/f and be mega honest with yourself about your ex. Is she the same girl you wanted to marry. Just be honest and take of the rose coloured glasses. :o)

God Bless and Good Luck.