Ex girl friend has my son who I have only seen once in 11 years, her husband wishes to adopt my son, and I am willing to sign off parental rights. Is there a way to do this without thousands spent on attorneys. Her husband is the only father he has ever known. I know we have to appear before a judge, but can anyone suggest any other alternatives?

No. Why do you think this will cost thousands of dollars?

I assume you haven't been supporting this child - ?

ANY question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area.

It is best to have an attorney to make sure the paperwork is prepared properly. If you are willing to relinquish your rights, then this should not be expensive. Have you or her even tried shopping around?

Frankly, if you haven't been supporting the child for all this time, paying for the lawyer would be a nice gift.

... Is there a way to do this without thousands spent on attorneys[?] ...

In theory he could do this himself, but it would there are pitfalls he should beware of. I have represented clients in step-parent adoptions many times, and, especially when consent by the biological father is available, it never cost anything near "thousands".

If you mean this may court 3 to 5 thousand, maybe, but not always, But then the savings you will have on child support should make you happy to help pay the fee

This is just my experience and I don't know where OP resides BUT the Judge makes the rights, duties, responsibilities of the parent who is "signing off" very, very clear. I've seen more than a few step-parent adoptions where the non-custodial parent is giving up all rights and does not have legal representation. The Judge makes sure everyone understands - and then makes sure they understand a second time.