Was just wondering if a guy is dating someone that's really pretty and smart but won't have sex with her is it because he is cheating? He is secretly gay? Or is it because of his insecurities of him being on the small side or just plain laziness due to smoking weed everyday?

Possibly. Depends on how much he smokes.

Have you asked him? Communication will often clarify or even resolve the issue.

A lot of factors come into play here.

Was there sex at one point but it has stopped?
Is the weed smoking a newer habit?
Has the couple talked about what's going on?

If there's a desire for sex, then sure the couple is at a level of communication where bringing up the issue isn't a big deal. If it can't be discussed, then there shouldn't be any sex.

They have been dating for 12 months and had only sex about 4 times an they do commincate but he doesn't like to talk about it. He says he is lazy. He smokes a lot everyday.

He smokes it everyday. When he gets up in the morning and at night after work. And sometimes during the day.

If those are the factors, then she needs to decide if his libido, lifestyle, and communication habits are of the caliber that she prefers in a partner.

He seems to be pretty comfortable with how he is, and likely won't change. So now it's up to her to decide if that's what she wants. If she isn't happy, she should split and find a partner with the same vision as her.

does smoking weed make a man nit want ti have sex? Hello clair:

Nahhh... I just burned a big one and I'm as horny as ever.

excon

But do you think that the weed is affecting his libido? He is overweight and likes to sleep a lot doesn't do much and if he didn't have to go to work he would probably play xbox all day. But no sex drive when it come to his girlfriend

Then he must be gay or there is someone else

The weed could be affecting his libido. His personality might just be that of a gamer, a smoker, and not much of a horn dog. He might not be attracted to his girlfriend.

It's hard to say what his deal is. What's easy to say is that if his style is unpalatable to his girlfriend, she should be walking away.

Then he must be gay or there is someone elseHello again, clair:

Maybe he's gay or maybe there's somebody else, or maybe he's just not in to you... Look. I don't know what the reason is, but it ISN'T pot. If you look around this board, it's filled with women who's men won't screw them, and men who's women won't screw them...

Also, what it ISN'T filled with, is women who think they're so damn sexy, that the ONLY reason their man could refuse them, is if he were stoned...

excon

Hello again, clair:

Maybe he's gay or maybe there's somebody else, or maybe he's just not in to you... Look. I don't know what the reason is, but it ISN'T pot. If you look around this board, it's filled with women who's men won't screw them, and men who's women won't screw them...

Also, what it ISN'T filled with, is women who think they're so damn sexy, that the ONLY reason their man could refuse them, is if he were stoned....

excon
The pot doesn't take away libido, but it DOES create a nice excuse and escape.

I've known plenty of guys who used weed as their excuse to not get down. But you're right, the reason wasn't the weed-it was just the easy way out.

Well one thing is for sure he can be lucky to be dating the girl he is with because he doesn't deserve her. She is an 8 when it comes to looks and he is about a 4. So its got nothing to do with attraction. He is just very lazy when it comes to doing things in general and she is an idiot for sticking around and going out of her way for someone who doesn't appreciate her.

Hello again, clair:

I'm convinced.

excon

But then why prolong the relationship? Its not like girls are linning up to date him he is almost 40 and lives with his parents. If anything she can do 10 times better but doesn't want to because she cares for him and never gives up trying. Thanks for all the advice so far

Why is SHE prolonging the relationship? That's the real question.

If he's self-proclaimed lazy, that would explain his reasons.

how old is everyone involved here??

how old is everyone involved here??

Wow, strike one for me. This whole time I thought we were on a different board. My bad.

He is 35 and she is 26

Comment on Synnen's post
Quote:

Originally Posted by Synnen View Post
How old is everyone involved here?
He is 35 and she is 26

So... you're the girlfriend the weed smoker is your boyfriend? In reference to this (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-sexuality/boyfriend-over-year-wont-have-sex-me-kiss-me-573710.html) thread you posted. The players are remarkably similar.

She's really pretty and smart and could do 10 times better than him plus there's no sex BUT she stays and posts two threads on their problems?

Why does she stay?

He is an overweight pot smoking gamer who is too lazy to have sex with a pretty willing female?

First ,if she puts up with this she is not smart.

Second , I am inclined to think he has more problems than smoking pot and being lazy.

I was grew up in the sixties and seventies and if smoking pot had that much affect on dampening the libido , the population would be cut down by 75%.
In some cases maybe it can when it is used almost constantly , but not as a rule.

As Judy asked... why does she want this loser?

Not sure, I guess because she really cares for him and is scared of being alone.

Not sure, i guess because she really cares for him and is scared of being alone.

A smart pretty girl is alone only if she wants to be.

Not sure, i guess because she really cares for him and is scared of being alone.

A smart girl moves on and finds a guy that doesn't have the baggage this one has. There are a lot of them that don't have this baggage and might even respect a smart girl even more.

A smart girl will find someone else... not all guys go after only Models that don't have the common sense to come in out of the rain. They know a smart girl can have meaningful conversations with them.

And a smart girl will know when its time to abandon a sinking ship.

I don't know about pretty and able to do 10 times better than this guy but I do have an opinion about her "smart-ness."

She works 2 jobs and busy with her MBA she isn't a supermodel but she is pretty. She just doesn't want to go through another breakup and she is doing all she can to make it work with him. But maybe it is ust time to give up and move on.

I don't think there's a question that it's time for her to move on.