View Full Version : Its my fault he's sad but I want him to see I have changed
help180507
May 1, 2011, 03:07 AM
I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years in may and we had a beautiful daughter together in December 2009, you could ask anyone who knows us we really was the happiest couple.. But I'm march 2010 I became depressed and started becoming snappy and off with him, I never meant to take it out on him, it's just unfortunate we tend to take it out on the person closest to us. He's taken so much off me the past year and it wasn't till he told me he couldn't take anymore, that he needed time away from mr that I reaized my ways had to carry on! I had to go to the doctors for help and I now have, but he's still hurting even with seeing my mood improving. I understand feeling won't just disappear but he knows he wants to stay with me and make it work and I keep telling him he's right to feel how he does but we need to look forward now and work through it together, what can I do to help him see all I want is for us to move forward and be happy because I really feel I can do that now, please help, I can't live without him
amicon
May 1, 2011, 04:29 AM
Have you suggested couple's therapy?
redhed35
May 1, 2011, 04:39 AM
Were you diagnosed with post natal depression?
If so, perhaps presenting him with facts not emotions may help.
If you were not, sitting down and discussing the why, how and where it went went wrong will help.
While you were going through your depression he was going through it too,i.e,watching and dealing with the situation on a daily basis, you have gotten the help now he needs it too, even just to talk it out with his doctor too gain insight and understanding on his own thoughts and feelings.
A baby is huge deal in a couples life, it takes time to adjust to being parents and still being a couple.
I wish
May 1, 2011, 08:27 AM
The first step is to continue improving on yourself. Once you've become more confident and more secure about yourself, then you'll be in a better position to continue to a healthy relationship with you.
As for what you can do for him, you can continue to show him that you've been making progress. With progress, there's hope for a brighter future.
Putting in a lot of effort is one thing, but the key is to constantly improve yourself and show him that progress.
aConfused1
May 3, 2011, 06:18 PM
I don't want to seem to be coming down on you - because I'm not - during your troubling times.
But, I feel that you're not giving all of us all the information that you could.
Clarity, transparency - it's the only way to improvement.
What are you afraid to talk about?