I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 year, but I feel he still loves his ex. When we first started going out he used to talk about her quite a lot so I told him about this and how I felt and he stopped, but a couple of month ago he wanted me to look for her on Facebook. I confront him about this, and he tried to say he wanted her to see what he's got.

I didn't understand how she would even know so then he changed the story to he wanted to see how she was getting on. When I confronted him again about this, he tried to say there was nothing wrong with this but, I think different. If he didn't still care about her why would he look for her.

All this as made me really upset, and it as made me really self conscious, as I'm thinking about this all the time. Please help as I don't know if I'm in the wrong, or if he is.

His behavior does make one wonder, and I can understand the insecurity he may be bring to you, so tell him what you are going through and read him the riot act that you don't like the way his words, or actions make you feel.

I think after 3 years you can iron this out by having a calm rational conversation, because a partner should make a partner feel bad without seeing there side and at least explaining, and reassuring where they are coming from.

So talk, don't confront, find out what the deal is with showing his ex up. Must have been some break up.

Well,I smell a rat-and his changing his story is a red flag.

Serious talk-and if he can't understand why you're concerned ,consider if he really is boyfriend material.

It sounds like he is not completely over his ex girlfriend, so you have two clear choices. You can either break up with him because he won't have the same level of commitment to you and you to him, or you can wait and hope that his feelings for her will die off at some point. I personally wouldn't wait.

Good luck,
Javi