Well it happened today. Max was put to sleep. His spinal column had collapsed and he was unable to use his hind legs at all. The vet said he was in excruciating pain, and even if he had the surgery to repair what was damaged, he may never be able to walk again, and at 12 years of age she was doubtful he would recover from it at all.

I got Max when he was 5 weeks old. He was my first rescue, my first Am Staff. I was 16 and in a heap of trouble in my life. As was he. He was the product of a puppymill/BYB. He was being fed raw beef at 4 weeks of age and infested with worms and other parasites. When I was on the scene when animal control stepped in and took the dogs from the home.Max kept me grounded. He was the first dog I had that I was totally responsible for. I worked to get his vet needs met, to keep him fed, to keep him healthy. When he was hit by a car at 8 months, it was my bank account that was drained to save him. I stayed with him at that vets office from the moment they would allow me in, until the moment they forced me out the door.

I was never resentful. I loved having him in my life, and he kept me out of trouble. I took him to obedience classes and enjoyed spending hours at the library reading up on his breed. I contacted other Am Staff enthusiasts and read and learned every thing I could about the breed. He was the SOLE reason I decided in going into rescue for the bully breeds. I'm 27 and have had many dogs grace my door way, either as a permanent home or temporary homes as a salvation from being euthanized just because of their breed. I kept them safe and sound until we could find them their forever homes. I loved each and everyone in their own unique way.

Max paved the way for me to open my heart to something other then teen age rebellion. He made me realize unconditional love. He was my boy, my best friend, the strong back I could cry on when things weren't going my way. I can't believe he is gone. My hands are shaking ad my eyes are tearing up. I've answered these types of threads a hundred times over. I know I did the right thing, but it doesn't make this loss any easier. My heart is broken, and Max took a piece with him when he went.

Oh Bella, I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I am glad Max is at peace now. Your story is beautiful and it sounds like the two of you had a great friend in one another.

Because of you, Max's memory will live on. You will remember all of the amazing times you had together and all of the support he gave you. You will remember what he taught you about life and about yourself. What he did for you will remain with you forever.

Stay strong, cry when you need to cry, laugh, and most importantly remember. *e-hug*

Thank you SOuthy. That means a lot to me. <3

My dear sweet Bella, I am so very sorry. I usually find the words to comfort strangers when this happens to them, but it's not easy when it's someone I know and love.

You've told me so much about Max, even though I never got to meet him. I know how much you love him (I won't say loved, because that love is still there, and always will be).

There aren't any words that can take away the pain. I could tell you that Max had a great life, and he was a very lucky dog to have found you. I could tell you that 12 years of wonderful is better then a lifetime of nothing special. I could tell you all of that, and it's all true, but it won't take away the pain you're feeling now.

I'm crying with you, sending you all my love, hugs, and comfort. I wish I could be there with you right now to hug you in person.


If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this -- the last battle -- can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn't want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We've been so close -- we two -- these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.

Author Unknown

Sounds like you two had some great times :)
Bear Hugs Bella
http://i356.photobucket.com/albums/oo8/lorimusgrave/hugs/Bear_Hugs.jpg

Bella, I so sorry to hear about Max's passing.

You tell yourself that you know they won't be with us forever, but it always feels like they should be. I guess they are in memories and spirit. Treasure each memory of him you have.

It may be too soon to think about, but you might want to make a book about him so that E will be able to remember him as she gets older.

{{{{{{Bella and E}}}}}}

George Carlin said it best. Life is a series of dogs.

It's really a shame that their lives are so short, but when you think about everything they do in their short time on earth, well, they fit 80 plus years of happiness into 12.

So very sorry Bella... the memories will be bittersweet. He helped make you who you are today and a truer friendship could not be found.

Know that many are thinking of you and Max...

Thank you guys. Alty that was beautiful. I'm bawling.

I love the picture of him and the cat. If that was Indy with the cat, all you'd see is the tail, coming out of Indy's mouth. ;)

What a beautiful boy. You can see his soul through his eyes. :)

I love the picture of him and the cat. If that was Indy with the cat, all you'd see is the tail, coming out of Indy's mouth. ;)

What a beautiful boy. You can see his soul through his eyes. :)

I totally agree with Alty. :)

I totally agree with Alty. :)

About seeing his soul in his eyes, or that the cat would be dinner with another dog? ;)

About seeing his soul in his eyes, or that the cat would be dinner with another dog? ;)

Well... Chloe would be wondering why the cat wasn't playing. Rissa would have been peeved that the cat was ignoring her.:rolleyes:

I agree with seeing his soul in his eyes. :)

What a sweet baby... :) He was fortunate to have you looking after him Bella, as you were to have him in your life.

You're right Doula. You guys are very kind. Thanks for helping me through this.

Bella, you shared Max with us. Thank you for that.

Bella I feel your pain in your words. It is always hard to lose a loved one. I am so happy Max had you to show him all humans are not bad. You improved his life so much! Cherish your memories, your photos and try to keep something special that was his. It will be painful to see it in the beginning but later on you will be happy you have it.
Max is waiting for you on the rainbow bridge, he is in no more pain and is playing with the other animals waiting for their human friends.

The Rainbow Bridge (http://www.indigo.org/rainbowbridge_ver2.html)

Owen sends puppy kisses to you as well.


Susan and Owen

I'm sorry for your loss bella, you an E are in my thoughts.

I'm so sorry for your loss Bella. I'm not good at words, but you and E are in my thoughts as well.

I'm so sorry to hear that honey, remember he will always be in your heart and you made his life wonderful.
Our thoughts are with you

Binx and ryu

Oh Bella, I'm so sorry for your loss, you two have something great.

I'm sorry to learn about this Bella. I'm sure that Max had a great time with you for those 12 years. Unfortunately, there's an end to practically everything, but there where he is, I'm sure that he'll be able to do the craziest thing he ever wanted to do :p

But most importantly, be with you forever :)

RIP Max

{{{{Bella}}}}

EDIT: And RIP to your fish too.

Thank you everyone.

I want to share something that Shazzy has done for me. I can't express how grateful I am for this. It's the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me! I love it and I truly do love you too Shazzy.

WOW-the drawing and the real pictures you posted a while back are so beautiful.

What a beautiful boy Max is.

Shazzy-you're so talented!

Shazzy, you are the bomb. That's totally Max! You captured his soul.

She really did. My mom says it's beautiful and thank you from all of us Shazzy!

Is this where I post a shameless plug for Shazzy? I think so.

No, I won't advertise, as it's against the rules, but I'll work around that. ;)

Shazzy is available to do drawings, painting, etc, for a small fee (I say small because I know the work that's involved in what she does, and she doesn't charge enough for her talent). As you can see, she's well worth the cost.

Can't post her website, that would be pushing the rules, but hey, just putting that out there. :)

Ben, I totally did it legit, so please don't ban me. :o

It is always heart breaking to lose a pet, especially the ones you grew up with. But just remember all the joy he brought to your life and all the doors he opened for you. This will be the dog you will never forget, and therefore he will be immortal. I know how good it feels to just let it all out and mourn for your loss, but take everything that he taught you and use it for good.

Max was lucky to find you, but more importantly, you were lucky to find him. Animals choose their owners, and Max chose you. That should be something you should feel honored with :)

Don't cry for too long.. I'm sure Max would come over to you and do something to make you crack a smile and laugh.

We should all take lessons from our dogs.. Never live with regret and every day is just as good as the next.

The world has lost a great dog. RIP Max

She really did. My mom says it's beautiful and thank you from all of us Shazzy!

:) I'm so glad you like it. Love you Bella, sending hugs.

Bella I am soooooo sorry for your loss! I still think about the dogs I have lost every day, the littlest things remind me of them. Just think, he is in a pain free and happier place.

Whenever I've had to put down an animal, this poem has been my go to...

When tomorrow starts without me And I'm not there to see

The sun will rise and find your eyes, All filled with tears for me.

I wish so much you wouldn't cry The way you did today


Remembering how I'd lay my head In your lap that special way.


I know how much you love me, As much as I love you,


And each time that you think of me, I know you'll miss me too.


But when tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand,


That an Angel came and called my name, And petted me with her hand.


She said my place was ready, In Heaven far above.


And that I'd have to leave behind, All those I dearly love.

But, as I turned to heel away, A tear fell from my eye.


For all my life I never thought, That I would have to die.

I had so much to live for, So many sits and downs to do,


That it seemed almost impossible, That I was leaving you.

I thought about our lives together, I know you must be sad.

I thought of all the love we shared, And all the fun we had.


Remember how I'd nudge your hand, And poke you with my nose.


The squirrel I would gladly chase, The bad guy "I'd bark and hold".

If I could relive yesterday, Just even for a little while,


I'd wag my tail and kiss you, Just so I could see you smile.

But, then I fully realised, That this could never be;


For emptiness and memories, Will take the place of me.

And when I thought of treats and toys I might miss come tomorrow,


I thought of you and when I did My dog-heart filled with sorrow.


But then I walked through Heaven's Gate And felt so much at home;


As God looked down and smiled at me From His heavenly throne.

He said, This is eternity, And now we welcome you.


Today your life on earth is past, But here it starts anew.


I promise no tomorrow But today will always last;


For you see, each day's the same day There's no longing for the past.

Now you have been so faithful, So trusting, loyal and true.

Though there were times you did things, You knew you shouldn't do.

But good dogs are forgiven, And now at last you're free.

So won't you sit here by my side, And wait right here with me?


So when tomorrow starts without me, Don't think we're far apart.


For every time you think of me, I'm right there, in your heart.



... And since I was laways reading poems after Tosha and Chip died... well I have a lot of favorites :)

--If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.