PDA

View Full Version : What do I do if I feel my parent is unfit?


tragedyx
Apr 24, 2011, 01:25 PM
I'm seventeen with a 22 year old boyfriend. My mother is lazy, and has me do everything for her. We get into physical fights when we argue, and she is constantly yelling at me and putting me down, my house is constantly dirty, and she doesn't go to work, she sleeps all day, and I really think she is an unfit parent. My boyfriend takes true care of me; feeds me, makes sure my homework is finished, buys me clothes, and makes sure I go to school. I want to move out, and change my legal guardianship to my boyfriend or my boyfriends mother. My problem is, what do I do? Is she even being unfit? And how would I even change guardianship? (because I've been researching, and haven't found an answer, so assuming I can even change my legal guardian at my age.)

JudyKayTee
Apr 24, 2011, 01:29 PM
You don't need a legal guardian. You're an adult. Move out if that's what you want.

Why at 22 do you need anyone to take care of you - feed you, check on your homework, buy you clothes, make sure you go to school? You're an adult. These are things you should doing by and for yourself.

It doesn't matter if you mother is fit or unfit. Again, you're an adult.

Move out. She cannot legally stop you.

J_9
Apr 24, 2011, 01:31 PM
You don't need a legal guardian. You're an adult. Move out if that's what you want.

Why at 22 do you need anyone to take care of you - feed you, check on your homework, buy you clothes, make sure you go to school? You're an adult. These are things you should doing by and for yourself.

It doesn't matter if you mother is fit or unfit. Again, you're an adult.

Move out. She cannot legally stop you.

At 17? Most places you have to be 18.

JudyKayTee
Apr 24, 2011, 01:34 PM
HIKES! Great catch. I read that SHE is 22.

My advice is wrong, wrong, wrong. J9 is right.

The only way to move out and become emancipated is to prove you can live on your own. Of course, your Mother MIGHT consent to allowing you to leave.

And I'm sorry - totally misread the question.

J9, good catch!

J_9
Apr 24, 2011, 01:38 PM
In Michigan you must be 18 to move out legally.

JudyKayTee
Apr 24, 2011, 01:59 PM
She can be legally emancipated at 16 in Michigan - I'm not saying it makes sense. I'm just saying she could ask the Court to be emancipated.

Best bet is to wait until 18 and then do whatever it is she wants.

My feeling is if boyfriend (5 year age difference) attempts to get guardianship his request will not be granted and that relationship will be called into question.

cdad
Apr 24, 2011, 02:52 PM
What state are you in?

JudyKayTee
Apr 24, 2011, 03:00 PM
Michigan - it's to the right, in her "profile."

cdad
Apr 24, 2011, 03:09 PM
Michigan - it's to the right, in her "profile."

Lol. I never check profiles until I have to. :o

JudyKayTee
Apr 24, 2011, 03:18 PM
I apparently read the profile but not the question.

ScottGem
Apr 24, 2011, 04:29 PM
When will you turn 18? Proving your mother unfit is not going to be easy. Changing legal guardianship to your boyfriend will not be possible. You might get his mother to do so, but the likelihood of anything happening until you are 18 is slim.

So bide your time, pack your bags and on your 18th birthday move out.

joypulv
Apr 24, 2011, 05:51 PM
I have 4 little comments, not being there to see just how unfit she is:
It isn't your house unless you are paying the rent or mortgage.
It generally takes 2 to have physical fights.
You should not need anyone to tell you to do homework or go to school by the time you are about 13.
I hope you aren't expecting another adult to be responsible for you when you are an adult in less than a year.

JudyKayTee
Apr 25, 2011, 06:51 AM
Good advice, Joy. I'm working on why the boyfriend feeds her (plus the homework, of course). In my mother's house if I thought something was dirty, I cleaned it. I lived there, too.

Sounds to me like mother is not exactly approving of older boyfriend (OP is probably in high school, boyfriend is 22) and this is a way around asking if OP can leave to be with the boyfriend. It's called "looking for an excuse."

I'd love to hear the mother's side.

AK lawyer
Apr 25, 2011, 08:10 AM
... my mother is lazy,...


Classic.

As the saying goes, "the seed falls not far from the tree". :rolleyes: