rlt13
Mar 5, 2011, 04:59 PM
Threads merged
To start, I am a sophomore in high school and so is my ex. We have known each other since 6th grade and we started going out in the middle of freshman year. Her name is judy, and she finally ended it the day before valentine's day, which makes it a year and a week long relationship.
My breakup is slightly unique because I know exactly why we broke up and I saw it coming from a mile away. As early as September of last year, we started having more and more arguments because we used to hang 5 days a week, but she signed up for so many activities this school year that it was hard to meet just twice a week. The frequency of arguments got higher and higher and then she told me that she "wasnt in love with me anymore, she only loved me" and "she didnt see me as a boyfriend anymore." finally she ended it because she said that I was too controlling and she needed to feel free.
She is also EXTREMELY busy with after school activities, which means that getting back would be hard because she already has so much stuff that she loves to do, and she wouldn't need a boyfriend anymore. In fact, the main reason we got together was that she figured having a fun guy around would fill up her empty life.
We maintained friendly conversation over gmail in the immediate days following the breakup, and we were quite friendly for the most part. The next week was mid winter break, and she was out of town, so we didn't contact each other for about a week. When she finally got back, we struck up another conversation on gmail and she seemed genuinely interested in what I had done over break.
In fact, I asked her if she missed me, and she said that she didn't bring her phone with her because she knew I would call, and she said that missing somebody would be too distracting during her archery sectionals (she won 2nd place by the way!). If I am interpreting this right, it means that she did miss me, but tried to keep it from distracting her.
Anyway, I totally screwed up at the end of that conversation because she told me to get over the relationship, and I told her that she had NO IDEA how I feel and that its easy for her to say because SHE was the one who ended it. She got pissed and told me to leave her alone.
The next week school started again (that would be this week), and I see her multiple times in the hall, and we have a class together where we sit relatively close. I fought against all my temptation to talk to her, and I left her alone for about 5 days. Finally on Thursday I was getting a ride home with a senior who happened to drive both of us home because we live really close to each other.
I left her alone for most of the ride, until the end where I was subtly flirting with her. She went along with it for the most part andi asked her if she wanted to hang next week sometime. She said that she would need to find out which days she was free. On Friday, I rode the same car with her back home and I did the same thing, except I was playfully touching her now. This time she seemed really annoyed.
Last night she sent me a chat saying that to be completely honest, she wanted me to stop trying to get back with her because it wasn't working, she wanted me to stop touching her, and she didn't want to hang with me at all because she has other stuff to do with her life. She also said that she was just "playing along" because she didn't want to start drama in somebody's car. I got a little mad and asked if she just wanted me to never talk to her again in my life. She said "yeah, that sounds about right." and left.
Any tips on what to do right now? I looked up some other guides online and one idea I have is to cut contact with her for 50 days, which would lead up to spring break. My birthday is also in a month, so I am hoping that she would at least take the time to say happy birthday.
In fact, a week before the breakup was our one year anniversary. I celebrated at her house and we chatted each other on gmail that night. She told me that she really hopes we can hit 2 years because she said that it was better to try because otherwise should be beat herself up thinking about what could have worked. I won't go into more details but it was a pretty emotional conversation, and I could tell that even though we had problems, she still wanted to be together.
Just ONE week after that, I called her 4 or 5 times because I was SUPER excited to tell her about how my school did at the team chess championships. She responded back saying that her phone was off for 15 hrs to change the battery, and in that span of time she gets 4 or 5 calls? She also said that she needed to be left alone for ONCE in her life, which made me feel a little angry because I was just calling to tell her some good news
To start, I am a sophomore in high school and so is my ex. We have known each other since 6th grade and we started going out in the middle of freshman year. Her name is judy, and she finally ended it the day before valentine's day, which makes it a year and a week long relationship.
My breakup is slightly unique because I know exactly why we broke up and I saw it coming from a mile away. As early as September of last year, we started having more and more arguments because we used to hang 5 days a week, but she signed up for so many activities this school year that it was hard to meet just twice a week. The frequency of arguments got higher and higher and then she told me that she "wasnt in love with me anymore, she only loved me" and "she didnt see me as a boyfriend anymore." finally she ended it because she said that I was too controlling and she needed to feel free.
She is also EXTREMELY busy with after school activities, which means that getting back would be hard because she already has so much stuff that she loves to do, and she wouldn't need a boyfriend anymore. In fact, the main reason we got together was that she figured having a fun guy around would fill up her empty life.
We maintained friendly conversation over gmail in the immediate days following the breakup, and we were quite friendly for the most part. The next week was mid winter break, and she was out of town, so we didn't contact each other for about a week. When she finally got back, we struck up another conversation on gmail and she seemed genuinely interested in what I had done over break.
In fact, I asked her if she missed me, and she said that she didn't bring her phone with her because she knew I would call, and she said that missing somebody would be too distracting during her archery sectionals (she won 2nd place by the way!). If I am interpreting this right, it means that she did miss me, but tried to keep it from distracting her.
Anyway, I totally screwed up at the end of that conversation because she told me to get over the relationship, and I told her that she had NO IDEA how I feel and that its easy for her to say because SHE was the one who ended it. She got pissed and told me to leave her alone.
The next week school started again (that would be this week), and I see her multiple times in the hall, and we have a class together where we sit relatively close. I fought against all my temptation to talk to her, and I left her alone for about 5 days. Finally on Thursday I was getting a ride home with a senior who happened to drive both of us home because we live really close to each other.
I left her alone for most of the ride, until the end where I was subtly flirting with her. She went along with it for the most part andi asked her if she wanted to hang next week sometime. She said that she would need to find out which days she was free. On Friday, I rode the same car with her back home and I did the same thing, except I was playfully touching her now. This time she seemed really annoyed.
Last night she sent me a chat saying that to be completely honest, she wanted me to stop trying to get back with her because it wasn't working, she wanted me to stop touching her, and she didn't want to hang with me at all because she has other stuff to do with her life. She also said that she was just "playing along" because she didn't want to start drama in somebody's car. I got a little mad and asked if she just wanted me to never talk to her again in my life. She said "yeah, that sounds about right." and left.
Any tips on what to do right now? I looked up some other guides online and one idea I have is to cut contact with her for 50 days, which would lead up to spring break. My birthday is also in a month, so I am hoping that she would at least take the time to say happy birthday.
In fact, a week before the breakup was our one year anniversary. I celebrated at her house and we chatted each other on gmail that night. She told me that she really hopes we can hit 2 years because she said that it was better to try because otherwise should be beat herself up thinking about what could have worked. I won't go into more details but it was a pretty emotional conversation, and I could tell that even though we had problems, she still wanted to be together.
Just ONE week after that, I called her 4 or 5 times because I was SUPER excited to tell her about how my school did at the team chess championships. She responded back saying that her phone was off for 15 hrs to change the battery, and in that span of time she gets 4 or 5 calls? She also said that she needed to be left alone for ONCE in her life, which made me feel a little angry because I was just calling to tell her some good news