JJ2011
Mar 24, 2011, 03:35 AM
Hello everyone. Just like the other article here posted by "Highschoolgirly", my mom is turning me into depression or I think she already have turned me and my other siblings into depression. Here is the story of her life.
First of all, she is (oh gosh, I don't even know where to start talking about her because everything about her life and also my father is negative)... she is drastically obese, uneducated, does not like to learn or read or try to use her brain in anyway, all she does is seat at home watches TV, cooks unhealthy food and expects us to eat it. My siblings and I live with my parents and we really try to eat healthy and watch our weights since the obesity runs in our gene too, so my siblings and I are very conscious about our life habits because we don't want to become like her. So she is always cooking unhealthy and if we don't eat it, she gets very upset. We are all adults ans spend time outside of the house most of the time and she is always mad at us. She thinks because we go out, we are trying to do something bad to her. Anyway, she is much younger than my father and they don't have anything to do with each other. My father is extremely selfish and he does his own things which he likes to go for a walk everyday, and play cards with his friends all day. My mom on the other hand is not interested to do any of the activities similar to my dad. And my dad totally avoids anything that my mom is interested to do which are going to restaurants, concerts and movies and traveling. Because of that I think my mom also gave up on life and is trying to eat her way to death. So anyhow, my biggest worry and issue and frustration here is that, I wish I could do something so my mom gets out of the house without requiring me and my siblings to take her out to eat, see the problem is that her whole happiness and the only time she goes out is when we take her out and all she likes to do when we go out is to go to restaurant... I honestly can not stand that and am so so worried for her, by the way she doesn't speak English and that makes her life more difficult too. I have tried so hard to make her go to class or read books at home or anything you can think of but she just does not like learning... she doesn't like to learn anything, she just veges out on the couch or in the kitchen eating and cooking, that's basically her life and oh , the rest of the time, she just talks to her families who are extremely superficial who just talk about how much money they have or who their kids got married to and tell her why we (me, my sister and brother aren't getting married because we're getting old now according to them) so the rest of the time of her day as soon as she sees me and specially my sister because she is older, she gets on our back so much for why we don't get married and why we don't bring her grand children, she thinks the only happiness in life is getting married and have kids. But we are OK with our life the way it is and we are all trying to establish our career and relationships and all she is doing is not helping and is just making all of us more nervous and anxious and depressed. My brother is fully depressed because of her, so is my sister and they're all trying to deal with that with their own way. My sister never comes home and is always working and then she goes to her boyfriend's house which she gets extremely mad at her and is always fighting with her and telling her bad words of why she is going out with him and not with another man with the same culture and religion as us and why she is not getting married. Also, she is such money hungry and she thinks the only things that make her happy in life is money and if we got married. When I tell her that she should try to loose weight and goes to the gym and at least for walk everyday and that would make her happier she completely disagree and says that "No, I'm not happy because of you and your siblings, if you got married, I would get happy but because of your life style I'm very depressed and sick" . Also, she is always sick and achy all over her body, at the age 55, she is just like a 90 year old person, she is deaf, she yells, she can't see well, she can't walk, but her expectations are so high, on a weekend day when we're all home, all she talks about to us is nagging and wanting things from us or doing things for her.. eg; she keeps saying: we have to do this, we have to fix this, this needs to be fixed, ahh what should we do with this, and calls my brothers name constantly, find us a better house, I don't like this house that we're living in right now, I'm not happy, or she says what kind of a life you are all having!! You should get married, bla bla bla bla and that goes on always, she never stops talking, imagine she talks like that 24/7..
Oh my god, people I don't know what to do with her, I mean I know I shouldn't be living with them or we shouldn't but its part of our stupid culture and habit that we have to live with them and if we don't, they would take it so personally and think that we are betraying them and are careless towards them and we are trying to destroy them. I can go on and on about her but I don't want to give you head ache more than this but this is a very severe case.
So, I wish there were some organizations that I could make her join, so she wouldn't be home all the time and make hers and our life so depressing. She is just sitting at home watching us going in and out of home like a dog and when she sees we are living to work she gets sad and if we go out for fun she gets mad at us and gives us dirty look and this is our case all the time. Every time we leave the house we have to take her negative energy or the guilt-feeling that she and my dad gives us with ourselves. My sister says that she feels exactly like me that every time she gets out of the house she feels terrible because she is just sitting by the door watching us leave and ask us so many question of where we're going when are we coming home and with whom we're going out. Basically she is making our life extremely miserable.
She was going to one of the adult day care center for a while and that was making her much happier but unfortuantely, they don't allow her to go there because they say that her medical doesn't pay for that service anymore, anyway, I wish that there was something for her outside of the house that I could find her to do that she actually would be interested in. the problem is that she doesn't even belieeve in volunteering work. She is such money hungry and does not like to work volunteering and also she is very over weight with limited physical ability and no English, so who would want to hire her or give her any sort of a job, but she has high expectations too and would not even baby sit for a low rate, she wants unreasonable incentive. Akkhhhhh.. I can't even say anything more my hands are about to freeze now typing this, I could go on and on and write till tomorrow about her and how she is affecting our lives but I don't want to bore you guys to the bone, I am just extremely helpless and hopeless regards to her. I don't know what to do anymore. The problem is that she does not like to do anything that involves learning and a little bit of physical activity as she says she can't walk, her legs and back hurt. I have gotten her gym membership with pool access, classes and all that so many times but every time she came up with so much excuse that she can't go, her legs hurt bla bla bla and didn't use it so much that I had to cancel her membership every time. I have done everything possible so she cooks and eat healthier but there is absolutely no way that she listens. Thank you
First of all, she is (oh gosh, I don't even know where to start talking about her because everything about her life and also my father is negative)... she is drastically obese, uneducated, does not like to learn or read or try to use her brain in anyway, all she does is seat at home watches TV, cooks unhealthy food and expects us to eat it. My siblings and I live with my parents and we really try to eat healthy and watch our weights since the obesity runs in our gene too, so my siblings and I are very conscious about our life habits because we don't want to become like her. So she is always cooking unhealthy and if we don't eat it, she gets very upset. We are all adults ans spend time outside of the house most of the time and she is always mad at us. She thinks because we go out, we are trying to do something bad to her. Anyway, she is much younger than my father and they don't have anything to do with each other. My father is extremely selfish and he does his own things which he likes to go for a walk everyday, and play cards with his friends all day. My mom on the other hand is not interested to do any of the activities similar to my dad. And my dad totally avoids anything that my mom is interested to do which are going to restaurants, concerts and movies and traveling. Because of that I think my mom also gave up on life and is trying to eat her way to death. So anyhow, my biggest worry and issue and frustration here is that, I wish I could do something so my mom gets out of the house without requiring me and my siblings to take her out to eat, see the problem is that her whole happiness and the only time she goes out is when we take her out and all she likes to do when we go out is to go to restaurant... I honestly can not stand that and am so so worried for her, by the way she doesn't speak English and that makes her life more difficult too. I have tried so hard to make her go to class or read books at home or anything you can think of but she just does not like learning... she doesn't like to learn anything, she just veges out on the couch or in the kitchen eating and cooking, that's basically her life and oh , the rest of the time, she just talks to her families who are extremely superficial who just talk about how much money they have or who their kids got married to and tell her why we (me, my sister and brother aren't getting married because we're getting old now according to them) so the rest of the time of her day as soon as she sees me and specially my sister because she is older, she gets on our back so much for why we don't get married and why we don't bring her grand children, she thinks the only happiness in life is getting married and have kids. But we are OK with our life the way it is and we are all trying to establish our career and relationships and all she is doing is not helping and is just making all of us more nervous and anxious and depressed. My brother is fully depressed because of her, so is my sister and they're all trying to deal with that with their own way. My sister never comes home and is always working and then she goes to her boyfriend's house which she gets extremely mad at her and is always fighting with her and telling her bad words of why she is going out with him and not with another man with the same culture and religion as us and why she is not getting married. Also, she is such money hungry and she thinks the only things that make her happy in life is money and if we got married. When I tell her that she should try to loose weight and goes to the gym and at least for walk everyday and that would make her happier she completely disagree and says that "No, I'm not happy because of you and your siblings, if you got married, I would get happy but because of your life style I'm very depressed and sick" . Also, she is always sick and achy all over her body, at the age 55, she is just like a 90 year old person, she is deaf, she yells, she can't see well, she can't walk, but her expectations are so high, on a weekend day when we're all home, all she talks about to us is nagging and wanting things from us or doing things for her.. eg; she keeps saying: we have to do this, we have to fix this, this needs to be fixed, ahh what should we do with this, and calls my brothers name constantly, find us a better house, I don't like this house that we're living in right now, I'm not happy, or she says what kind of a life you are all having!! You should get married, bla bla bla bla and that goes on always, she never stops talking, imagine she talks like that 24/7..
Oh my god, people I don't know what to do with her, I mean I know I shouldn't be living with them or we shouldn't but its part of our stupid culture and habit that we have to live with them and if we don't, they would take it so personally and think that we are betraying them and are careless towards them and we are trying to destroy them. I can go on and on about her but I don't want to give you head ache more than this but this is a very severe case.
So, I wish there were some organizations that I could make her join, so she wouldn't be home all the time and make hers and our life so depressing. She is just sitting at home watching us going in and out of home like a dog and when she sees we are living to work she gets sad and if we go out for fun she gets mad at us and gives us dirty look and this is our case all the time. Every time we leave the house we have to take her negative energy or the guilt-feeling that she and my dad gives us with ourselves. My sister says that she feels exactly like me that every time she gets out of the house she feels terrible because she is just sitting by the door watching us leave and ask us so many question of where we're going when are we coming home and with whom we're going out. Basically she is making our life extremely miserable.
She was going to one of the adult day care center for a while and that was making her much happier but unfortuantely, they don't allow her to go there because they say that her medical doesn't pay for that service anymore, anyway, I wish that there was something for her outside of the house that I could find her to do that she actually would be interested in. the problem is that she doesn't even belieeve in volunteering work. She is such money hungry and does not like to work volunteering and also she is very over weight with limited physical ability and no English, so who would want to hire her or give her any sort of a job, but she has high expectations too and would not even baby sit for a low rate, she wants unreasonable incentive. Akkhhhhh.. I can't even say anything more my hands are about to freeze now typing this, I could go on and on and write till tomorrow about her and how she is affecting our lives but I don't want to bore you guys to the bone, I am just extremely helpless and hopeless regards to her. I don't know what to do anymore. The problem is that she does not like to do anything that involves learning and a little bit of physical activity as she says she can't walk, her legs and back hurt. I have gotten her gym membership with pool access, classes and all that so many times but every time she came up with so much excuse that she can't go, her legs hurt bla bla bla and didn't use it so much that I had to cancel her membership every time. I have done everything possible so she cooks and eat healthier but there is absolutely no way that she listens. Thank you