View Full Version : Is this normal or abnormal?
ladybug4637
Mar 12, 2011, 07:56 PM
I am the age of 20, who choose not to go on dates, movies, hang with friends, have a boyfriend or girlfriend nor go shopping to see the latest fashion in stores. Instead, I spend most of my time cooped up in the room and on my computer talking to my family and classmates from Facebook. I never talk to them on the phone nor meet up with them face to face somewhere. My mom thinks I am losing it and that I am starting to burn out. She has also said, "that I am afraid to go to college and that this is my time to blossom into the real." I mean, I am not afraid to go to college nor be around amongs people. I just like to be in my room (to me that's my comfort zone).
I know it's my fault for not having friends. My reason why for not having friends. Is because, I can't trust people and I have insecurity towards everyone I meet. At one time in my life, when I was in the 9th grade and I had a very close friend. She double-crossed me and lyed to me and not just her but other people that I claimed as a friend did the same thing but worse. Every since then, I don't trust people nor do I want to affiliate with anybody. Because, I hate dealing with drama and bs. Is this normal or abnormal? Please somebody tell me if I am mental case or I am losing my mind?
tickle
Mar 13, 2011, 03:53 AM
Isolating yourself from the real world is abnormal. Everyone has to deal with the insecurities of life, it is part of the learning process and we don't stop learning until we die. You are doing yourself enormous harm by not wanting to cope with day to day activities. Your mom is correc.
Tick
Eileen G
Mar 13, 2011, 03:55 AM
Feeling safe and secure in your comfort zone, and spending a lot of time on-line is normal. Refusing to go out is a bit more worrying.
However, refusing to make friends because you refuse to trust anyone is not good. Yes, of course some people will lie to you. But some will tell you the honest truth (sometimes even if you don't want to hear it) and many people are capable of amazing generosity and love. You'll never know what you are missing if you don't take a chance and get out there.
Go and meet people in person. You don't have to tell them your deepest darkest secrets. Just talk to them about the cool games you've played, or the amazing clip you found on YouTube, or stuff like that. Real friendship takes time to grow.
mandybaldwin
Mar 13, 2011, 01:38 PM
Don't be hard on yourslelf your not a mental case. Yes I think its abnormal to go from one way of being to the complete opposite it sounds more like depresson. My suggestion is to talk to your doctor call a crisis line maybe even go to a mental health treatment program to help you get out of the Facebook addiction and how to have fun again. Appretiate everything you have. This one friend doesn't make up the rest of the world. The best advise I ever got out of the program, it may sound a little offensive at first but the more you say it the better you will get it, what other people think about you is none of your business. Its not meant to make you upset just blunt. Its harder to be that different of a person then to be you. Go for a walk for even 10 min a day in the morning go get the mail and walk to the end of the street or something it helps to get outside.
KBC
Mar 24, 2011, 03:02 PM
I am the age of 20, who choose not to go on dates, movies, hang with friends, have a boyfriend or girlfriend nor go shopping to see the latest fashion in stores. Instead, I spend most of my time cooped up in the room and on my computer talking to my family and classmates from facebook. I never talk to them on the phone nor meet up with them face to face somewhere. My mom thinks I am losing it and that I am starting to burn out. She has also said, "that I am afraid to go to college and that this is my time to blossom into the real." I mean, I am not afraid to go to college nor be around amongs people. I just like to be in my room (to me that's my comfort zone).
I know it's my fault for not having friends. My reason why for not having friends. Is because, I can't trust people and I have insecurity towards everyone I meet. At one time in my life, when I was in the 9th grade and I had a very close friend. She double-crossed me and lyed to me and not just her but other people that I claimed as a friend did the same thing but worse. Every since then, I don't trust people nor do I want to affiliate with anybody. Because, I hate dealing with drama and bs. Is this normal or abnormal? Please somebody tell me if I am mental case or I am losing my mind?
You are not dealing with the problem from the emotional pain from the trust issue.Facing this would bring you back to reality, let you see what you are missing from isolating yourself from the world,, Who suffers when you do this,you or the world you are upset with?
No,you will not always get the advice you are looking for,nor will every person you meet tell you the truth, it's a reality that people lie,cheat and steal.. human nature.
That doesn't mean YOU have to leave the world to run itself without your input,you are worth something to this planet, and to go to collage,get a degree,work,be productive,participate in the economy other than online, all these things are still available to you,you just need to find some balance in life, some time inside,some out.. human contact is also human nature, go and get some, you won't regret it!
Ken