I am only young but I am pregs. I live at my boyfreinds with him and his family because my mum doesn't want me there. I still contact my mum and everything but I want to know if it is right to keep the baby and live like this ?

How old are you? Can you live where you are indefinitely? What about school and having a normal life?

I'm 16 and in australia. I go to school and have a normal life I guess its just getting complicated cause of this thing

How far along are you? Does your mum want you to get an abortion or give the baby away?

I have no idea. My boyf knnows. I was crying too much to hear the nurse doctor person. And my mum doesn't care as long as I can still go to school.

Do you and your boyfriend want to keep the baby? Have you talked about it at all, or is this very new information about the baby?

What do his parents say?

DAnna, is there something we can help you with? I'm really not too sure what your question is.

Um we haven't really talked about it because I get to scared and just burst out in tears. And its like 3 weeks old news. And his parents say that they will stand by us no matter what our choice is.

And I just want to know if it is right to be pregs and have the baby or is abortion the right choice.

At the moment I kind of want to keep it. I don't know what to do :/

Having the baby, having an abortion, or giving it up for adoption is your decision. I'm sure you understand that we can't make that decision for you.

This is something that you will have to sit down and talk with your boyfriend, his parents AND your parents about.

You are very young, how will you afford this baby?

Yeah I know we just need help with it though. And we will talk to them when we are ready cause I'm still trying to understand it and I think my boyfriend is too. And money won't be a problem me and him both have trustfunds we can use.

Are there any counselling services in your area, I'm in ireland and we have a number of them for example CURA, they help pregnant women with providing information on every aspect of pregnancy and choices available.

Have a look in your area for a similar service.

This is a huge step in your life, your going to need help to figure this all out and come to terms with what is happening.

DAnna, we really can't make this decision for you, but we can help you by letting you know what options you have.

You've had 3 weeks to absorb this, how do you fell about becoming a mom? How will you feel if you have to raise the baby on your own? Chances are you and your boyfriend won't stay together, young relationships rarely last forever. So, are you prepared to be a single mom?

Do you want to finish school? Do you dream of one day having a career? Have you thought about how you're going to achieve that if you have a baby? What happens when the trustfunds run out?

Those are all things to think about if you decide to keep the baby.

You also have the option of adoption. Is this something you're considering?

Of course abortion is also an option. How do you feel about abortion? How does your boyfriend feel? Have you talked to a doctor about the procedure?

You really should discuss all these options, not only with your boyfriend, his parents and yours, but with your doctor.

In the end the choice is yours and yours alone. It's your body.

I have no idea haven't thought about it, I'm still freaking out by the fact of it. I wouldn't trust myself with it, I can do it on my own,BUT I know that someone will always be there. Im not going to be a single mom ever. I need to finish year 12 to get into my course. I have basically stopped thinking about the future cause I no that even if I have this baby I can still be a dancer :). Umm not sure about the what will happen when it does. Don't think it will cuase I have a job that contributes to it as well :) and idont know about adoption cause if I have it I will want it. And I really really don't want to have an abortion that's cruel and mean but if I have to I will. Thanks :)

DAnna, over the next few days gather up ALL the information you can find,go online, ask your doctor, find out.. and then you can make an informed educated decision, when you have that done its easier to form a plan and at the very least you will know what road your going to take.

Is it normal to be scared as fudge and like cry heaps at night cause you can't handle it ?

is it normal to be scared as fudge and like cry heaps at night cause you can't handle it ?

Yep!

For most women anyway, even those who plan a pregnancy.

Get all the information you can, it will take some of the fear out of it,the unknown is scary.

If you have an older women to talk too, someone you trust and has your best interest at heart,it will really help.

OK thanks. This is the most scaryest thing ever. Please tell me I'm doing the right thing atm

What are you doing?

Wondergirl.. What do you mean?

ok thanks. this is the most scaryest thing ever. please tell me im doing the right thing atm

Danna, I'm going to be a bit tough. You're not going to like what I have to say, but this is part of being a grown up, so you need to hear it.

Yes, you're young, but you made the decision to have sex, even though you knew pregnancy was a possibility. Now you are pregnant. You made an adult choice, and now you have to be adult enough to make a decision about the consequences of that choice.

No one here can tell you you're doing the right thing. You have to decide what you're going to do.

It's time to be a grownup. That's what's expected when you play grownup games.

You need to find the resources available in order to make a decision about this. You need to decide what you're going to do. You need to stop feeling helpless and be mature about this, because you're going to be a mother. You are going to be responsible for another human being. One way or another you're going to have to learn to be an adult. Adults have to make tough decisions every day.

Yeah, I no it is my deision to root my boyfriend and everything I'm and trying my best I just don't know what do do, well I do now... I want to keep it but will it be OK ?
Thank you though (:

yeah, i no it is my deision to root my bf and everything im and trying my best i just dont know what do do, well i do now... i want to keep it but will it be ok ?
thank you tho (:

We really don't know if it will be okay.

If you go by statistics, you're going to have a hard time being 16 and raising a child. It's not only a matter of having the money to do it, it's the fact that you're still a child yourself.

Statistically speaking you and your boyfriend won't last. I know you think you will, I know you said you'd never be a single mom, but chances are you will be. If he leaves it's up to you as a mother to this child, to take care of the child.

It's not going to be easy. You'll be giving up your childhood. No partying, no being a teen. You'll be a mother, and you'll have to put the baby first at all times.

Your life is going to change drastically. You will be responsible for another human being. You can't be a child anymore, even though you are one. You have to grow up and you have to do it quickly. Being a parent isn't easy even under the best of circumstances.

I'm trying my best. Ahh k maybe talking to randoms about this isn't the right thing to do because I am getting more and more scared :/ but me and elijah will last as long as we can. Are you a parent?

I have two kids.

I know you're scared. I know I'd be terrified if I was 16 and pregnant.

I also know you're trying your best.

I can't tell you what to do, because I never want you to regret whatever decision you make. I can tell you what I would do if I was in your shoes, but that's me, not you. I'm afraid that if I say what I'd do, you'll do it thinking it's the right thing, and it may not be the right thing for you.

This isn't an easy decision. No matter which option you choose it's going to impact your life.

I can offer an ear. I can offer advice. I can be here to help, but I really can't tell you what to do.

I don't have much more that I can add here. But I wanted to say DAnna, that you really only have 3 options here: Adoption, abortion or you keep the baby. We can't make these decisions for you. You have options, but they are YOURS and YOURS alone to make. Nobody can tell you what to do with your body.

You aren't the first girl put in this situation, and you certainly won't be the last. Just make sure you learn your lesson this first time around.

My situation was quite similar to yours, while I wasn't a teen, I was in my very early 20's. I knew for me, I wanted to keep my baby. I knew I was going be raising my daughter on my own, but it was a sacrifice I was willing to make. Let me tell you, single or not, raising a kid is HARD work. It's a 24/7 job. It never stops. So when spring break comes, and you want to party, but are too tired, broke and don't have a sitter, don't expect too many people to be sitting at home with you folding baby blankets. I am not joking when I say becoming a young mother is a sacrifice.

What ever you decide is the right decision for you. Talk to your boyfriend, see how he feels, and make the decision for you.

The child can be a blessing, it will be hard, but while if you were asking about it before you were pregnant, I would say no. But no is not really a choice now,

First how about calling it what it is a child or baby, not "it" Lets start giving the child its own part of your life.
There are, depending on where you live, support groups, teen mothers shelters if needed and more. There is also welfare that will help with doctor viisits, medical costs for the baby, and food and things for the child. Time to start growing up quick and finding out.

Many schools ( sad to have to) have couselors in the schools that will help you with many of these programs.

Altenweg... can you please tell me what you would do? I'm not going to make any decisions tell we decide what's right.

Aurora_Bell... OK thanks

Fr_Chuck... sorry but the baby is an it to me atm. And I am growing up and mature to take responsiblilty and find the things out I'm doing it now. And I'm keeping school out of this.

Do you know how far along you are?

I don't but elijah does. Whys that

Why does Elijah know, but you don't?

Do his or your parents talk about the baby with you?

Because I was crying and **** when we got told so I wasn't really listening. And kind of not really. Why?

A pregnancy is nine months long. Did you get pregnant a month ago, or three months ago? You need to know how far along you are. If you decide to have the baby, you have to start taking special (prenatal) vitamins, for instance.

That's right, you will need to get ready to do your prenatal care. It's very important to know these things.

Also, if you decide to have the baby, you will have to let the school know you are pregnant.

k. Ill find out when he gets back.

Where is he? When will he be back?

Altenweg... can you please tell me what you would do? im not gonna make any desicions tell we decide whats right.

Aurora_Bell... ok thanks

Fr_Chuck... sorry but the baby is an it to me atm. and i am growing up and mature to take responsiblilty and find the things out im doing it now. and im keeping school out of this.

Okay, I'll tell you what I'd do, but that doesn't mean it's the option for you.

I would either give the child up for adoption, or have an abortion. Why? Because at 16 I know I couldn't have properly raised a child.

I had my first child when I was 27. I was married, had a house, a career, and tons of support, and it was still really hard. I can't imagine doing it at 16 with no support from my parents (you said your mom doesn't care) and no way to support myself and a child.

Adoption would be my first choice, but I understand how hard it would be to give up a child once you've carried it for 9 months. So, at 16, I'd most likely opt for an abortion. Not that it would be an easy choice, which is why I keep saying it's up to you.

No matter which option you choose, it's not going to be easy. None of the options are ideal at 16.

Honey, when is your due date? If you don't know, could you please ask Elijah?

I am a nurse. I deliver babies. It is VERY important that you take very good care of yourself right now, and that means prenatal vitamins and OB doctor's visits.

Elijah is at training and he will be back at 5.

Yeah. I get what your saying and everything thanks. But I'm going to wait till Tuesday and ask the doctor and nurse what they think will be good. And ill talk to elijah.

No idea and yeah I'm going to talk to him about it later. Ill tell you once I know.
What's OB?

Cricket training. And yeah he is why wouldn't he be? And OK thanks

What kind of training? Isn't he in school?

OB = baby doctor (obstetrician)

An OB is a pregnancy doctor. A baby doctor is a pediatrician. ;)

Oook thanks :)

DAnna, you really need to start making some decisions. If you decide on abortion there is only a short limited time you can have one. After a certain length in your pregnancy an abortion cannot be performed. I don't know about Australia, but here in the US you can't have an abortion if you are past 13 weeks pregnant.

I no I'm under 10 weeks I no that. But OK.

I'm 16 and getting an abortion. I would like to know if anyone knows what it is like and if I should be scared and freaking out or not?

I know. DAnna123, this IS something you will NEVER forget, but don't let someone else's opinions decide for you what you and your parents think is right. Hopefully your doctor recommended whom you should go to. Your feelings are to be expected and not to make lightly of the act itself, it will all be over very quickly. I'm old enough to be your grandmother, but I don't think the procedure would have changed very much over the years. You may be given a light sedative and afterward, something for pain. You will be sleepy or asleep for several hours and that seems to help with the emotional part of it. You may feel (like)cramps for 1 to 3 days. After your sedative wears off, I don't think there are any physical restrictions necessary. Your question certainly reminded me of something I will always wonder about for the rest of my life. I wish you the best. Do not freak out.

JustV

Thank you JustV. Yeah I have got the place to get abortion and everything storted. I no about the pain. Just wannna know what its like to like do it and ****. Thanks and I think I have already started :/

Decided on abortion :)

Make sure you receive counselling, and take care of yourself, bring someone with you for support.

I wish you the best for your future.

K thanks. But why consilling ?

k thanks. but why consilling ?

Your making a life changing decision, I would have suggested counselling for any of your options.

In a good clinic there will be someone available to talk to you about your decision, they will go though a few tests,blood tests, a scan to determine how far along you are and the type of precedure they will do,it's a lot to take in,even for a grown adult women with lots of support,from your posts I know you don't really have that, a counsellor will help guide you through the emotions your going to feel.