Hello, I live in NY and I have a 7 year old daughter. Her father has never been very interested in being a Dad, he has been in and out of her life since she was born. He held her for an hour when she was six weeks old, then disappeared. He came back for about 6 months when she turned 2, but walked away when I filed for support. Then he came around again when she turned 6, but could not hold it together long enough to keep a visitation schedule. He disappeared again about 2 weeks before her 7th birthday. She was and still is devastated and she is now in thereapy for her feelings of abandonment and "unlove". What should I do legally? Is there a way that I can prove that he is unfit and take away his rights to her? I just don't want her to hurt anymore.

The sticky note on this forum about abandonment and termination of rights is a good resource for this question. The short answer is no. From your description, he hasn't done anything that is a danger to her so he isn't unfit. You can't force someone to be a good parent, and you can't terminate their rights because they aren't doing what you would like.

What you CAN do is file for child support if you haven't already and if your visitation schedule is informal, file for sole custody to protect your rights. Unless you protect her, he can continue to waltz in and out of her life at will. If you legalize your custody, he will at least have to get a visitation order to do so.