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View Full Version : My boyfriend denies cheating on me but I believe it's true!


brklynrikkan
Feb 26, 2011, 08:02 AM
we've been together for three years been through it all!! And our situations have brought us closer together when I ask him to chane he does and same for me. He even has the date we gotten together tattooed on his arm, in which was during a break we took and I was shocked he did it. We decided to get back together in January on a school trip we took and from then on things been going up SINCE I seen the girl write on his Facebook wall that she loves him and every time their together she gets the butterflies , I confronted him about it he got really mad because he told me to trust him and that this girl is stupid because they don't talk! From then on I looked on her wall and she writes about him daily since January . I feel so used because if I knew this was going to happen I would've never taken him back. Tuesday he officially broke up with me due to my lack of trust for him but I only believe that this was excuse. He told me that he called his cousin and told the girl to stop talking to him but I called his cousin and he said that he never called . Then some female that was friends with him a while back tells me that he told her about him and this girl getting together in late January. I HONESTLY don't know who to believe. He told me he deleted his Facebook in which was a lie because last night he told he that he doesn't want to be with me anymore because I broke a promise and got on Facebook and he updadted his status saying that he has sum way better =) and she likes it! But how did he do that if he deleted his Facebook!. hummm... this too was a lie ! He's been treating me lie **** lately.. ie breaking up with me over a text not wanting to talk.. saying that he doesn't even want to talk to me anymore.. when I text he says he's busy.. I believe he's honestly done with me and used the Facebook to create an excuse to be with her because he has yet to delete her comment or delete her as friend or even block her . NOT TO MENTION his mom called me this girls name and seemed like she said that she's sauls girlfriend so if all this is true.. I've been going to his house thinking that everything is okay when his family knew he was cheating on me ! I really love him a lot but I'm not dumb!! And I honestly believe I need to leave him for good . I cry for himeveryday and pray that god shoes me a sign to leave for good but what we had was great ! I love him with my whole heart and I know that he will fix things for me but I feel like giving up on it I've cired wayyy too much and he's just been heartless... I just want to see who he'll choose

JudyKayTee
Feb 26, 2011, 08:39 AM
No way for us to know who he will choose. It sounds like your jealousy and insecurity are driving him away.

You can't make anybody do anything they don't want to do - and that includes who he texts, talks to, anything else. He's either willing to stop contact with the other person or he's not.

If you honestly believe you need to leave him for good, then that's what you have to do. I honestly don't think God (or anybody else) is going to send you a sign.

I don't know what you mean by "he will fix things for me" - it sounds like he isn't willing to stop contacting this person (for whatever reason). What "things" is he going to fix for you?

He's heartless - your words - and you're upset all the time. Why stay in this relationship?

I think you need to stand back and take a closer look at yourself, him, the relationship.

adviceishere
Feb 26, 2011, 08:53 AM
I on the other hand will give you a sign LOL LEAVE HIM!! Your making a fool of yourself, your ringing and texting him all the time and I don't know how many people I keep telling this too, get off Facebook!! Its no good, too much snooping around and not enough living life. Move on... this is all way to intense.. he's an idiot and your completely obsessed! You want to see who he will choose? Don't you feel cheap saying that? Cut all contact, block him on Facebook if your not going to cancel your account, and you will start to feel better soon, get out in the open air and find things to do... don't worry it WILL blow over

Cat1864
Feb 26, 2011, 09:09 AM
If he got together with the other girl when you were not a couple, then he did not cheat. IF the relationship continued after he got back together with you, then that is another matter. However, I have to wonder at that point which one of you is the 'other' woman.

He is not responsible for what someone else writes. He is responsible for his own actions or lack of them.

You don't trust him. You don't believe him. Unless you are willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, there is nothing he can say or do to change how you feel. You have to make that change yourself. However, that doesn't mean you should ignore warning signs especially when they are as large as these are.

You have been given a sign. He broke up with you. Whatever his reasons, he made it clear your relationship is over. He has made a choice. It isn't the one you wanted, but I think it is the best one for both of you. It is now your turn to to accept it is over and let go.

Give yourself permission to heal and let him and ALL of the hurt go. You do not want to carry the anger, frustration and doubts into another relationship. Which is what will happen if you don't allow yourself to heal.

Get involved in your life and leave him to his. Keep yourself busy both mentally and physically. Give yourself ways to heal. Go out with your friends. Meet new people and make new friends. You are going to hit downward spirals as move forward. Give yourself ways to even them out. It can be exercising, volunteering, throwing yourself into a school project, joining a club, getting out with friends, etc.-anything that helps you redirect your thoughts and get you back on track.

As much as you can, use No Contact. No Contact is a method for ending the confusion and false hope that trying to stay friends or in communication can foster. No Contact is having no communications of any type with your ex. You don't initiate contact and you don't accept contact. You defriend and get rid of all phone numbers and email addresses. Do not ask friends for updates on how he is doing and ask them not to tell you.

Take care of yourself and heal. In the future you will find a better relationship.

vanheart
Feb 27, 2011, 04:14 PM
"he doesnt even want to talk to me anymore"

Then don't talk to him anymore.

"i just want to see who he'll choose"

He's already made that decision. Its not you.

Time to get the Tats removed. Along with him.

" I believe he's honestly done with me"

Then truly believe it & move on. Hes no longer worth your time.

talktome1
May 30, 2011, 11:22 AM
Don't be silly girl... follow your instinct. A guy makes up his mind and that it... its not you! Go out have fun, show to him that you better off without him... Dont sulk yourself for nothing. If you think he cheated and lied to you.. thats it! Its us who made CHOICES... we can't force the person to love us... Calm down... cheer up! Don't be obssesed and be snooping around on his Facebook... He already decided... at the end of the day... we get into the relationship facing the risk, but the CHOICES is ours to hold on... ba happy or be sad. Have a nice day!