View Full Version : 2year old waking up frequently! I'm at the end of my rope! Help please!
Kristinec
Feb 9, 2011, 08:57 AM
My 2 year old was sleeping through the night, bit has started waking up anywhere between 1:30 am and 5:00am and crying for mommy. I comfort her, ask what's wrong(says she's doesn't know), won't let daddy help, tells me to sit in the rocking chair beside her bed. This morning at 4:40 I sat there for 20 minutes then left. She starts screaming again, screamed for nearly 25 minutes tried to puke on me to get her way. I am exhausted so I finally took her to my bed(something I swore I'd never do), she fell asleep. I am at my wits end with this, any suggestions are VERY very welcome! Thanks I'm advance!
JudyKayTee
Feb 9, 2011, 09:06 AM
Your daughter is running your household. Have you read this?
I would speak to a Physician, make sure there are no physical problems involved and ask him/her how to cope.
Now that she's been in your bed once that will be your next problem.
My sister had a ritual when her daughter did this - she came in, set a timer for 10 minutes, stayed, then left. If the screaming continued for more than 30 minutes she came back and set the timer for 5 minutes. After that she did not come back.
Eventually her daughter got the message and began to sleep through the night - or, if she woke up, didn't scream for my sister.
But, again, first my sister made certain it wasn't a case of night time terror or something else. The Physician told her it was part of the terrible twos.
Child sleep: Put preschool bedtime problems to rest - MayoClinic.com (http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/child-sleep/CC00020)
suzisu
Feb 9, 2011, 09:11 AM
Bringing her into your bed is a big 'no' once you start its hard to stop! Staying beside her is also a no, I know people who have to stay with their 8 year olds!
Do not let her crying get to you. Unless there is an obvious reason for crying, Put her back down and tell her its time to go to sleep. Do not cuddle or kiss her, just put her down and walk away. Then if it continues go back in and put her down again, saying goodnight. Do this once more after this just go in and put her down saying nothing. Do not cuddle her or let her cling to you. Do not let her crying get to you ( that is the hardest part! ) It is very tiring and you will be tempted to think it is not worth it, but after a few nights of this you should see a change, the child may still wake and cry a little but she will not demand that mom sits with her as she will realise that does not work. It might take about 3 or 4 nights (I have had it working sooner and also longer!) but I think it is better in the end for the family!
If you want to put a stop to it happening, be sure you do not cuddle her or speak except to tell her bed' or 'sleep' etc. She is looking for comfort and unless something is wrong, there is no reason why you should give in.
If you try this and after a week or more it is not working, ask here again!
Kristinec
Feb 9, 2011, 01:19 PM
Thanks for your responses. I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's so hard letting her cry at night for 30 minutes(or more). I feel like I'm ignoring her or sending the message that I don't care about whatever the reason is that she's crying. I will try the timer idea and letting her cry until she eventually falls asleep. She just keeps sc reaming though, I've tried cry it out with her a little before and she will go for an hour(I check every 25 min). She's generally quite cooperative during the day(she is 2 so does have the odd tantrum), so this is a bit shocking. I will also make a doctor appointment. Thanks again. Kids are just so tough sometimes!
Wondergirl
Feb 9, 2011, 01:25 PM
Kids are just so tough sometimes!
Wait until she turns 11.
jenniepepsi
Feb 9, 2011, 01:40 PM
There is NOTHING wrong with your child sleeping with you. It is called co sleeping and many familys do it, including mine, and my child coslept with me until 5-6 years old, and she had NO trouble moving into her own room.
HOWEVER, if it is not what YOU want, and it is not what works for your family, there is also Nothing wrong with your child sleeping on her own. You need to enforce it. It will be hard. You will have nights of no sleep, listening to her cry. Tough it out. Once you get through the hard weeks, it will be much easier.
Good luck hon. Look up some books on 'cry it out' or even the 'ferber method'
JudyKayTee
Feb 9, 2011, 01:42 PM
there is NOTHING wrong with your child sleeping with you. it is called co sleeping and many familys do it, including mine, and my child coslept with me untill 5-6 yaers old, and she had NO trouble moving into her own room.
HOWEVER, if it is not what YOU want, and it is not what works for your family, there is also NOTHIGN wrong with your child sleeping on her own. you need to enforce it. it will be hard. you will have nights of no sleep, listening to her cry. tough it out. once you get thru the hard weeks, it will be much easier.
good luck hon. look up some books on 'cry it out' or even the 'ferber method'
I would be concerned about the lack of intimacy with my husband.
jenniepepsi
Feb 9, 2011, 01:50 PM
I absolutely agree judy :P that's why it doesn't work for everyone. With me and ayla, its been just us most of her life, except for the 3 years I was married. And even then she slept with us most of the time :P
DoulaLC
Feb 9, 2011, 04:24 PM
Since it is only recent it is likely more to due with her stage of development. She is two, wanting to be comforted in the middle of the night when she wakes up alone is perfectly normal. Sometimes just the reassurance that you are nearby can do the trick and allow her to settle back down.
Be sure she gets adequate rest during the day (being over tired will make it worse), and that she winds down with a consistent bedtime routine each night. Try the timer, but do not be afraid to let her be with you if need be. Different things work for different babies/toddlers and households.
More than likely you will find that it passes before long and she is back into a routine again... only to mix it up for you again at a later time... :)
suzisu
Feb 11, 2011, 02:04 AM
Another thought you could also try putting on some soft gentle music to calm her
jenniepepsi
Feb 11, 2011, 07:17 AM
That is a great idea suzisu, my 7 year old still has light classical music playing in her room with a nightlight and she has no truoble sleeping