View Full Version : It hurts the most
frosty91
Jan 24, 2011, 11:02 PM
My girlfriend of 5 months tells me she loves me everyday but while she says she loves me. She can't seem to get over her ex. Who has absolutely treated her like she was a piece of meat and I can't seem to understand why she can't get over him but now when we talk on the phone she tells me she loves me but she says she still loves her ex. She says she doesn't want to hurt me because she cares for me. She's told her friends that she would break up with me. But then she found out that her ex was just trying to get back with her just so he could get a piece and then he was going to break up with her for another girl. Okay I thought we were good now as she told me she was done with him. The next day she tells me again that she still loves him but she loves me also and she knows it wouldn't work with him and that she just wants to have a break but she doesn't want to stop talking to me while were on the break because she can't go a day without talking to me I just want to know what should I do because this has been so stressful and she has hurt me while trying to not hurt me I don't know what to do can someone please help me
questions3110
Jan 24, 2011, 11:16 PM
It's tough to hear that the person you love loves someone else but if I was in your situation I would let her go. She obviously isn't over her ex and she isn't ready for a serious relationship with you. If you are OK with her loving someone else and possibly breaking YOUR heart then stay but if that's not what you want move on. You will find someone that will love you and only you
joypulv
Jan 25, 2011, 02:07 AM
Yes she CAN go a day without talking to you, if you put a stop to it. Tell her that you have to go cold turkey out of pain and that she can contact you when she is really and truly done with him - and she gets ONE chance at that or it's over forever.
She's been honest with you so far despite all her waffling, so at least your suffering isn't based on lies.
As for 'love' of someone who treats her like dirt? That isn't love; love is 2 way. It's 'why do you hurt me, why don't you love me, I can't let go until you stop.' She needs to learn that on her own, and as long as she has you as a crutch, it will drag on and on.
talaniman
Jan 25, 2011, 06:15 AM
Her words say love but her actions hurt. The two don't match, and who is suffering. Please consider she is still stuck on her ex, and would go back if she thought he was serious.
Remove yourself from her because she is using you to get over her ex, and/or make him jealous.
You never let someone put you through this kind of mistreatment, because they have to be with someone, and you just seem to be it.
What usually happens when she IS over him, she will be strong enough to explore on her own, without you. Save yourself the pain.
answerme_tender
Jan 25, 2011, 08:28 AM
I totally agree with above postings. You need to let her get over her ex-boyfriend.
Her telling you she "love you" is just BS. You don't love someone and yet willing to dump him to go be with your ex for a quick night stand situation!! She is one of these individuals who like to say the words, but really has no idea the TRUE Meaning of them!! Beware of people like this, they may also like to use the word "sorry" a lot without really meaning that one too!!
Listen, no one wants to go around with " USE ME" posted on their forehead. But if you let this girl continue to be wishy washy with you, then you might want to get those words made into a stamp!!
You deserve better, move on. You never know what girl your missing out on because your wasting your time with this one!!
Take care
frosty91
Jan 25, 2011, 10:54 PM
Thanks everybody for the words of wisdom I really appreciate it I've took everyone's advice and decided that if I wasn't going to be here top priorty and instead be the "second option" its just not worth my time and effort I mean I've never done anything wrong to deserve this sort of treatment but as everyone tells me my excessive kindness is my downfall I just let people walk over me sort of speak. Thank you everyone for the great advice it really helped out a lot when I needed it the most thank you all