I don't usually post questions up on sites like these, just sort of browse them. But I've had something floating on my mind for such a long time now, kept putting it off and keeping any form of feelings to myself. I figure letting some of those built up emotions out on a thread in a website might help keep my emotions from escaping.

I used to attend classes with a girl who I had befriended 6 years ago. We use to be really good friends for the first 3 years and then we just drifted apart and went our separate ways. Not because of any issues between us, just to fact that time itself has an effect on you to loose friendships as well as gain them. Before we went our separate ways, I had built up a 'crush' for her and even opened up to her to let her know how I felt, although what I didn't realize at the time was she was already taken. I was too late.


Since then, we have attended different post secondary schools and we haven't spoken to each other for 2-3 years now yet my feelings for her just keep growing. I'm starting to find it difficult to focus at times because she seems to haunt my thoughts. I want to rid myself of any feelings towards her and at first I figured time would cure me of this but it has only proven to be my rival.

I can't stop thinking about her and I would just love to re-open up and let her know again that I like her but you can't just go up to someone you haven't spoken to for so long and tell them you still have feelings towards them. I've little interest in other girls for none of them are her. I don't want to admit I love her for love is a strong word but having these feelings for such a looong time has got me wondering.

I've been able to avoid letting my emotions out and kept them locked up, but this chest is getting full and I don't want anyone to see me so vulnerable. Figured online suggestion would be perfect for me. Suggestions?

Well, Your situation is so perfect to express your feelings towards her, and I believe that she also aware of your feelings. The only thing you have to do is just express your each n every thought about her if she says yes' you've got jackpot. If says 'no' or just ignored you at least it will help you to forget about her and you can concentrate on your goals of life peacefully. I believe peace of mind helps in growing your observation ability.

Valentine's Day is approaching.. how about one of those little dinky cards kids give each other, that come in a package of many for very cheap. They are pretty tiny and they are not intimate. Include a brief note about how you really do think about her a lot, and it would be so wonderful to see her and catch up. Actually ask about a day to get together, maybe a Saturday afternoon in a coffee shop. How could that possibly go wrong, even if she does say she can't, or she does see you but has someone else?

Here's a story I heard second hand: a guy was in love with a girl who had someone else. He moved away but called her once a year for YEARS. She always had someone else. Finally he gave up and didn't call her. She called him to ask why, and said she had broken up and wanted to see him.

I would reach out an make contact with her. Maybe just talk on the phone at first, ask her to lunch or a movie. But remember distance makes the heart grow fonder, 2-3 years is a lot of time. She may have changed, and you may be "loving" this idealized version of a girl you once knew. But regardless, good luck when you finally reconnect, I hope it's lovely.

I love a good happy ending!

So many times we remember people we were fond of and old crushes. Its pretty natural to wonder, especially if you catch glimpses of them from time to time. That always triggers old feelings and hopes again.

But I can also tell you that we feed those feelings a lot, and they seem to grow, often without any contact and provocations from the target of that crush. Also be aware when there is a lull in our lives we tend to go back in time and feed that flame.

All that to say this, keep it real when you drop into someone's life after so long being out of contact, because while you were feeding your curiosity, and hopes, no telling how they have changed, or what they have, and are going through, or where they are in life.

I know sounds kind of negative, but that's what keeping it real is about, not having false hope, or unrealistic expectations. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. You never know, unless you are willing to take a risk, which I would do if I were young single and free.

Not too much going on in your social life, huh??

We tend to look back, and wonder more when there is nothing happening to keep us focused on now, so we look back, with fondness, and feed the memories, curiosity, and hope of what if. It grows into an itch you have to scratch.

Whatever you decide, don't get too carried away with it, go in with open eyes and mind, but protect your own heart. She will be a stranger, even if the chemistry is still there.