I didn't meet him until my early 20's, but spent some time with him and kept in touch for the next 20 years. I am sure we would have been much closer, but his wife, who was 34 years younger than him, and only 5 years older than me, did everything in her power to make that difficult, and I never truly understood why. He was a retired commercial airline pilot, and operated a couple businesses, had a couple houses, etc. i.e. he was quite well-off financially, but not incredibly wealthy. I made it clear I wasn't after his money, I've done just fine myself in life. She just seems weirdly posessive and insecure. In his final 2 or 3 years he would only call me when she wasn't home, and if I called him when she was, he acted distant and short with me. When he died it took her 3 weeks to inform me, depriving me of the chance to attend the funeral. When I looked at his obituary online she had written it to say he "had no children". Well... that really made me mad. It also makes me think that if he had of left anything for me, she obviously wouldn't go out of her way to make sure I received it. I guess I don't understand how that process works? His health was failing quite significantly for his last year, and if he had of initially left me any money, she probably could have changed that during that time... but? How would I go about seeing his will without traveling across the country to do so? If he had of left me anything would I have received it by now? Would it be her responsibility to make sure I received it? The obituary is what had made me suspicious about this. There is no point even asking her about it, and I hope to avoid ever having to talk to her again. I never expected anything from him, but if he did leave me anything... after how she treated me, I really don't want her to get away with that too.

If he has a will it would be a public document available through the probate court. I suggest calling the court in the county where he lived and ask how to get a copy. Do a Google search using the name of the county plus "probate court" and you should be able to get contact information.

It is the responsibility of the executor of the estate to make sure that all heirs are notified. If she did not do that then either (a) she was not the exceutor, or (b) you are not named in the will, or (c) something nefarious is going on. Another possibility is that he died without a will, and in that case his estate would be split between his wife and any children.