Im am 27 years old. A little over a year ago me and my girlfriend of 4 years broke up. I shortly, like 2 weeks later, started seeing a friend from the best(old co-worker). At the time I thought it was a good idea maybe some help to get over my ex keep my mind busy and help me move on. As the year went on I found myself not adjusting, I couldn't commit to her comepletely and she knew that. I spend most of my free time with her have brought her around my family but couldn't commit because I felt like I wasn't completely over my ex. So I come to find out in that year early on she had slept with some that she has slept with before. Then while on vacation kissed someone. But again I wasn't giving her the comitment she wanted so I kind of let it slide. When that stuff came out she knew it kind of her me and her so she told me she wanted to change being that person. Again, still not fully committed I give her crap about the things she had done and said we should stop talking. Come to find out that in the couple day stretch of us not talking she had slept with someone but she says during it and had to stop caus she started crying. She's 28, now she was dating someone for 7 years and was engaged to him and broke it off earlier in the year we started seeing each other. They owned a house together that she has since sold while we were seeing each other. I really do believe she is a good person with a huge heart but I just can't make sense of the things she has done. Is she acting out for her and the fiancée break up? I really don't know, am I being a sucker for even still talking to her? Did I build this person by never committing? Can she be trusted in a real relationship?

Can you be trusted, maybe not to cheat, but get you head wrapped around the true facts?

You have two people who have rebounded to each other trying to replace a long termed failed relationship, but neither of you has had a proper healing, and you both have carried the baggage of your past failure to the new relationship.

Its no longer a matter of trust, she cheats, and you cheated by never being fully committed to the relationship.

I think you leave each other alone, completely, and rebuild your life around yourself, and not around having another person, now you have two failed relationships to get beyond, and that will take a long time to heal from.

While its not unusual to latch onto someone else, its best to move on when you know your heart just ain't in it. The sooner you realize this the better.

I agree with Tal---you both need to leave each other alone.

You are just using each other anyway, so why even act like you are in a relationship. You are both still trying to get over other people. Neither one of you have tried to really heal from your break ups, and learn what you each want as individuals in a real relationship. So you tolerate each other so you don't have to face being alone!!

Don't you think its finally time to learn to be on your own, to see what you want, and how to obtain that. To start fresh!! Take care

All I am going to say is this smells like rebound. Read your own post and its clear as can be on both your sides. Simple solution. Take time to heal for yourself or you can never move on successfully.

I now resent her for the things she has done. Can she be trusted? After doing something that she come to find that hurt me and then doing it again[did I push her to that by pushing her away]? Can I move on from all this? I had this girl on a big pedastool before dating her. She has a huge heart and a sweet girl but question her honesty and loyalty.

I know realize I started dating her too soon but this was a girl I always had a thing for. I always thought this was the type of girl you could marry. Do I let her go? Can she be trusted did I push her to her decisions?

Of course you let her go, because she is now doing her thing without you, and doing it her way without any lip service from you. Actually, you let her go because you really do need to find your own thing to do, that doesn't involve a girl friend. How about just friends with no strings attached or any romantic intentions. Learn to be single, and have a good time.

You need to move on. You didn't push her to make her choices. She is her own person and she made those choices on her own. It doesn't matter if she is a good girl or not. Now is not the time for either of you. You almost seem like your trying to force something just because. You yourself even stated you didn't fully commit. So take time for you and only you. There are a lot of good girls out there. Not just that one.