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cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 05:57 PM
Is it normal that my Girlfriends ex keeps texting her when they just say there friends? I believe my girlfriend when she says there is nothing going on, but I get the feeling he wants something.. Should I be worried about him texting her every day and her texting back everyday? Is this normal?

pocahantas
Jan 10, 2011, 06:09 PM
Its not normal for him to be texting her EVERYDAY!!

You should make yourself clear that it makes you uncomfortable and she should ask him to stop texting and she should stop replying.

Keeping in touch with her ex would only be normal if they had kids in common and need to discuss the children's needs etc.

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 06:20 PM
They don't have any kids togther.. She said she would delete his number and said I could look through her phone, but I've never wanted to look through it, and I've said don't delete it because of me.

I was just wondering if it was normal that they should text everyday? And I mean every day

dynocompe
Jan 10, 2011, 06:34 PM
Not normal and I would not accept it if it was me. I wouldn't ask her to stop. I would just say I am not interested in this relationship if you have not cut your ties with your ex. I have been in your shoes before, she is keeping her ex close by as back up. Doesn't want him out on his own. Its not right. Ex's only make good friends after they have been broken up for a very long time with no contact IMO

mystific
Jan 10, 2011, 06:36 PM
Circumstances vary on 'normal'.

How long have you and your girlfriend been going out for? And how long was she with her ex?

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 06:42 PM
We are just fairly new in relationship terms.. and she wasn't going with her ex for that long as I know of. She says there just friends, but I feel he wants more and they text all the time. If she wasn't interetsed would she not just ignore him?

Or at least only text every once in awhile? I don't even text my friends every day.. they text everyday

mystific
Jan 10, 2011, 06:52 PM
Mmmm without sounding like a complete devils advocate, but are you by chance the rebound? You aren't the toy to torment the ex to realise what he's missing?

Ask her to leave her phone at home one day and you both go out together. See how tied she is to her phone and how interested she is in you. If she's swears up and down that she needs her phone and then she replies to his text while out..

Make sure you're a long way from home.. and make her walk back :eek:

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 06:59 PM
Narr she isn't like that lol.. we can both go without using our phone or needing to see who's texted.. I believe her when she says she's not interested in him. I just don't personaly think its right he should be texting every day and her texting back

kirsty546
Jan 10, 2011, 07:11 PM
It is not normal, if they are over they are over! Unless they have kids together there should be no contact whatsoever between them! Its wrong!

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 07:19 PM
Even if she say there are just good friends?

mystific
Jan 10, 2011, 07:34 PM
Narr she isn't like that lol.. we can both go without using our phone or needing to see who's texted.. I believe her when she says she's not interested in him. I just don't personaly think its right he should be texting every day and her texting back

Sorry, it takes two to tango. If she didn't reply, he wouldn't have a 'conversation' going.

If it doesn't mean 'anything' to her.. have his number blocked, don't reply, change your phone number.

Sorry.. still doesn't sit right I'm afraid.

slapshot_oi
Jan 10, 2011, 08:25 PM
First thing I see, she is manipulative. By saying "I will delete his number if you want me to" and "go ahead, look through my phone", you look like the bad guy if you agree to any of that, which is why you let it continue.

It's evident that she has some sorting out to do--and yes, it's possible she's on the rebound like mystific pointed out--and being in a relationship probably isn't the best thing for her at this moment. I think you should tell her this.

Just Dahlia
Jan 10, 2011, 08:37 PM
It doesn't seem right to me, but maybe she is addicted to texting:confused:

I do know that when some one texts me I don't want to be rude and always text back, but she is saying that he is her best friend? Than why did they break up?

Isn't one of our goals in life to be married/dating your best friend?
I'm certainly striving for that:D

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 08:47 PM
There not best friends, just close friends or something like that. So I take it by people comments I'm not wrong in thinking its something to be concerned about then? Maybe I should say something again about it.

Enigma1999
Jan 10, 2011, 08:47 PM
K. A couple of things here I would like to point out. First, I agree with mystific with the whole rebound.

Secondly, I'm going to take a different approach here. I for one am pretty much friends with all of my ex's who I talk to on a regular basis. NOW, do I want them back? No. Do I want to sleep with them? No. Well, some of them. Lol No, seriously though, I am friends with them. Therefore, I'm not against the whole "they're over, so why should they talk" sort of thing.

However, if you two are hanging out together or having a conversation, and she is non stop texting, then yes, that's rude. Even if it were her girlfriends, that's rude.

If you feel so uneasy about it, then TELL HER. If she knows how you feel and continues, well there you have it. Your answer that is...

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 08:59 PM
She doesn't reply to him if she's with me. Yeah I briefly spoke it about it once but said it was fine. Clearly it wasn't fine for me lol. I was just wondering if I was wrong in thinking this and should I say something again or leave it be.

She's been cheated on and beaten up by ex boyfriends so she knows what its like to be cheated on so I don't think she would cheat on me. I was just concered more on the guys behalf texting her non stop and her replying.

I think she can text him if there friends but not all the time. If its something that bothers me she should also respect my feelings right?

Enigma1999
Jan 10, 2011, 09:19 PM
Absolutely she should respect your feelings if it does bother you. There is nothing wrong in how you are feeling. I for one am not a jealous person, so if my boyfriend texts his ex, so be it. If he wants to be with her then see you!

Look, people are going to do what they want to do and there is NOTHING you or I can do about it. What you can do, is give her the benefit of the doubt, put your trust in her, and stop stressing.

Believe her. Go ahead. Try it. She might surprise you.

cmyweb
Jan 10, 2011, 09:47 PM
Thanks. Im a big beliver in everything happens for a reason and at the end of the road you'll always get to where you should be. I trust her that she wouldn't cheat on me I know that much. I just find it uncomfortable with her ex texting.

I'll tell her how I feel again and see what we can do as a mature couple. We all should always talk to our partners about our feelings.. I just wanted to get some feed back before I said something in case it was me just being silly x Thanks again

Just Dahlia
Jan 10, 2011, 10:47 PM
Your not being silly and just to let you know... you don't have to use the 'comment' thingy. Just reply like we have been doing:)

Please let us know what happens, good or bad. I think you will do the right thing and get to the bottom of this.:D

talaniman
Jan 10, 2011, 10:59 PM
How old are you both?

kaka67
Jan 11, 2011, 01:52 AM
She doesnt reply to him if shes with me...............
i think she can text him if there friends but not all the time.


You seem to be contradicting yourself.

One minute she's texting him all the time and him her.

Next you say she doesn't text him when she's with you.

Then how do you know they she texts him all the time? Doesn't make sense to me... maybe I missed something... :confused:

Collegeguy_24
Jan 14, 2011, 11:35 AM
Dude, I learned from personal experience, it is a bad thing.

My EX, when we were together, would text her ex back and forth, but she said she loved me and wanted a future with me, so I let it go.

But what happened in the end? She left me for him.

DO NOT allow her to text her ex, tell her it makes you uncomfortable, and that you want it to end. She is with you and not him, if she can't accept that, then dump her and move on. Because if you allow this to continue, then the probability of her leaving you just gets greater and greater.

dynocompe
Jan 15, 2011, 02:30 AM
Tell her your trust her, but not him, and there texting makes you feel very uncomfortable and you do not like having that feeling. You may only want him as friends, but I think he is after more, and this is just not going to lead to a good situation. So please respect my feelings on this.