Besides the fact that I had been in a relationship for a very long time that I let really break me, or so I still think. I'm not really at the point yet where I see my growth or what I've learned, still, I know I'll get there.

MY question is this:

What makes a person a worthy person of existing?

I am the type of person that doesn't let anyone I know, hell, even someone I don't know, fee down on themselves or bad about themselves. I'm realistic and also plagued with bipolar (I know my illness has a LOT to do with my self-esteem too). I just can't seem to apply the things I say to others to myself.

When I'm manic of course I think no one can touch me or hold a candle to who I am, That I NEVER have told anyone till now. Yes, it is a normal sympton, but no ne wants to say that about themselves, well, not me, at least.

I have a hard time holding a job, I don't make very much money, my BF really has been supporting me for the last 5 years. I work but the times when I can't he's been awesome. I feel like I know I love people and I love helping other people, it's just I have a hard time knowing what it is I should do with my life, right now. I don't a really calling to something, I did go to school and majored in Psyc.(not surprising, I'm sure:-)) wanted to be a therapist, but I can't even get it together to go back to school and get that lovely PHD. I see all the people around me and they have careers, or jobs they can handle and they evolve over time into doing new things... I just feel like I'm not evolving.

There are things about myself that I like, but how to really love myself no matter what is going on?

Thanks for any helpful tips!

One of the things I've always remembered was this: of the 5 million or so sperm released, only one sperm (YOU) survived and managed to penetrate the egg successfully, not only that but you lasted the whole term without hiccups. We tend to take this process for granted but this is why it is called the miracle of life because it really is. Now that's got to say something about how special you are doesn't it? You yourself are a miracle, don't take that for granted. If you need any more reasons, you know where to find me.

Well it sounds like you've got the love and support from your boyfriend and that's great for you! Now it seems like you need to just figure things out for yourself. You've got that psyh degree and honestly, there's no rush for the PHD. Take it one day at a time, school will always be there. Take up a hobby, maybe exercise more! Take care of your body and free up that mind girl!! Yoga helps! Come home to your favorite place in the house, turn on some relaxing music, light some candles, start a bath. You've got to get it together! Love yourself and show your man how thankful you are that he's in your life! It's normal not to take your own advice, yet we seem to feel like we're experts when we talk to our friends. You can start by being a counselor for school kids, or at community centers. Some place that doesn't require a PHD just yet. Good luck to you and leave the stress behind!