I don't know what to do. Have a guy I love to death, we've been dating for 2 year.s For 1 1/2 years it's been a rough. After 6 months of dating, his grandmother's neighbor came in while the family was putting her into assisted living, and changed the will, giving himself 1.5 million in cash, 320 acres of land and a house - was all suppose to go to my guy. This neighbor did it in a way to cover his tracks. His grandmother was 93, with dementia, and he brought in a lawyer to do this, of course it was in Arkansas. Laws about this are horrible there.

It was hard for me to watch without getting involved. After lawyers, and everything spent to save at least the family farm, he got his family land back. It eats my guy up though, because this neighbor got everything - including the money.

To make a long story short, it's been hard on our relationship but I've stood by "V" (my guy), through thick or thin. It literally broke him, not only financially but mentally, he can't get over it. Wants revenge. I don't blame him, but he needs to let go.

It's been terrible hard on us. I took him to Seattle, for his birthday last month, my family all lives there. We had a wonderful time, wonderful... but for the past 1 1/2 years,
He leaves me about every 2 months, it's like clockwork, I noticed it since she died.

V did something strange at christmas. He can't get back into working - since we've been back from Seattle. He has no motivation. He knows I wanted a ring for xmas.
I didn't get it. Christmas day he made me a big tool box, and told me it was a jewelry
Box, which there is no way it would fit in my bedroom. I told him 3 days before christmas, he would need to start contributing to us, since he moved back the first part of November. I could tell he was upset, but kept saying, I am sorry, I have been taking advantage of you. I told him we should have discussed this before we got wrapped up in you moving in. He told me he'd never ever leave me again. He wanted a bill of everything he owed me. I painted both his houses as well, one to get ready to sell so on.

Christmas day, he seemed preoccupied, and I was upset he wouldn't sit down with me before all the company arrived, I had 35 people at my home, the rest of the day. I had made breakfast, then went to church.

I was dissapointed about my gift, but tried my hardest not to show it. It didn't help. I was just hurt. The next day, said to me I am sorry I am such a dissapointment, and started in on me, started yelling at me, I clam up and don't say a word, but I hung up, won't let anyone yell at me. He called back and said he had a $7500 ring for me in a hateful way, I hung up again, I couldn't bear to hear it this way. It was so horrible.
My heart was broken.

Next thing I get is a text, that he left the ring at my home, on top of this huge tool box, jewelry box. He left a 3 1/2 page letter on it too, telling me to take the ring back to the jewelry store, and get the money out of it. He doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore. I was devastated. It was a 7500.00 leo diamond princes cut wedding engagement band. I haven't had a ring for 30 some years, and have been divorced for 9 years now. I am sick with hurt. My holidays are ruined. My son just came home from the war, he got wounded, and my family and children are all upset about this too, of course everything I say, everything is always my fault.

Because of how he gave me the ring - I gave him until midnight to rectify the situation. He has left me so many times... leaving me to never return, I can't take it anymore. I wrote him a letter back telling him I'm not his whipping post anymore. I don't know what to do.

Holidays feel ruined, and I am just tired of life right now, how do I pick up the pieces?
My dreams are shattered for a wedding ring - I talked to the jewelry company, and he bought the ring 2 weeks before christmas, even put a rush on ordering it, and was planning to give it to me for christmas. I went over to his house, and gave it back to him, with all the warrentees, he said he was going to put it on eBay, but he would still be making payments on it. It is beautiful. I said I couldn't accept the ring, because it wasn't given to me out of love. Told him he has till midnight to rectify the situation.

I don't know if I did the right things, or handled it the right way. But I know this, it wasn't right how he gave it to me, and it wasn't given out of love.

this guy has problems and issues that you can't do anything about,and nothing is going to change unless you get off this emotional rollercoaster your on.

take love out of the equation here,and what's left? A guy who's messed up and keeps leaving.

do you really want to be married to him,because if he does not sort his head out now its going to keep happening.

crap happens to everyone,you suck it up and deal, adults don't run away,well, they should'nt,not from the man/women they profess to love.

you need headspace and a clear view to take in the bigger picture,he needs councilling.

I read all of your other threads,you're a smart women,and you have been seriously burnt.

protect your mental and emotional health,this relationship is becoming toxic,and no diamond no matter how beautiful or how presented can match in value a relationship that has mutual understanding and respect.

You are not my favorite person in all this either. You demand a ring, you don't like his handmade gift, you give midnight ultimatums. I'm guessing that he felt that the time wasn't right to present the ring, and that's HIS prerogative. It has to feel right, when he's the one who has to fork over the dough. You can certainly say you want to get married or else you are out of there, but deciding what and when and in front of all your family on Christmas, that's too much.
All the other baggage is just noise in this relationship. Time to each find someone else.