Arcadio2911
Dec 18, 2010, 01:12 PM
So I am a high school student and I have this friend and we've gotten really close and I told him I was bi and a couple other friends. At first I only told two friends and he was the last one of the group to know, when I told him he got very quite and mad. He didn't speak to me for a day or two and finally began being friendly again and I asked why he ignored me and he responded with "I was hurt that you told me last". I moved on and forgot about it. As the year progressed I told more and more people. I began to grow close with him. He started to talk about this girl he liked and I decided to help him but it never really seemed like he liked her too much.I was beginning to fall for him but I swore to myself that I would not make a move on him because he was "straight" although he checked guys out and said it was only because he wanted muscles like them.I would laugh and say okay. One day he told me he had the perfect April Fools prank on pretending that me and him were going out and we'd fool everyone, I asked are you sure because holding hands won't convience our friends and he said oh well maybe one kiss will convience them. I said I don't know and thought he would forget; the next day he asked again and I said I don't think it is a good idea they will make fun of you. He said it didn't matter so I went to a friends house and told her what was going on and how I felt, so she told him that I liked him and his response was " I couldn't do anything sexual with him but if we were to get married I know it would work out". I spent the next days sad and depressed but I didn't show him that side. He did Ask why I liked him and I said he was nice and kind. Days went by and my birthday was coming up. My friends like to use my phone and flirt with him and he'd flirt back saying naughty things like sucking his ****. I took it as a joke and went on until one day it pissed me off he kept doing that and I just went off on him and we got in this huge fight and he told me he can survive without me but I couldn't without him. I left angry and tried to forget. I felt horrible and so I apologized. He didn't answer me for days until the day before my birthday party he said I'm only accepting your apology because of your party and I don't want people to know we fought. During the party he made no contact because I was scared he might still be mad so I gave him his space. He left that night without a goodbye. The summer was coming to an end and school began. He hardly made eye contact or talked. Things got better and we began to talk again. We had to take an outdoor education trip for a week with out class. We went on out trip to Catalina Island. We both were in the same group and tent. When we set up to sleep he wanted our sleeping bags to face each other so we could talk at night. During the first night we talked and he caressed my face and I did the same to him. The next morning I kept saying to stop while I was ahead. I didn't want to hurt myself.The next night we talked again and I wanted to ask why do you lead me on but I didn't want to and so I left him with the "never mind" and he kept asking what I wanted to say and I said don't worry about it. He said I would have to tell him eventually and he was right. The next night we had an activity in the night to do, I was a little scared and so he held my hand and told me he was there. We sat in the grass in the pitch black and he held me close under his arm telling me it was going to be okay. After it was over I let go and we headed back to the tents. He asked if I was still scared and I said no I am good thank you.The day to leave the island had come. We got on the boat together and I bought him something to eat. He stood at the top of the boat. I was cold and he looked at me and said if I was cold. He offered to take off his shirt and give it to me. I looked at him with a face of laughter and he said " you know I love to be shirtless". On the boat we talked about traveling together, he said plane and I said boat. We planned out ways of traveling. I finally asked him why he lead me on and he said he was like a mirror and just reflected people's feelings back to him. If I was nice to him he would show the same kind of behavior towards me. He also mentioned he was sad I didn't speak to him during my party and that it really hurt him. When we got to shore, he came to my house and then left. The days went by and he'd come over and he'd sometimes talk about the girl he liked. One day I sprained my ankle and I couldn't drive us to a party so he drove. We both sat together at the party and whatever I didn't like to eat he'd eat. He said he hates to have food go to waste. Through out the car ride I fed him candy and we talked.Our friends in the back said we acted like a married couple. Even the girl he liked thought we were a married couple.A couple days later he was sad and I asked why and he said he had a problem on his croch. He asked for me to look at it. So I did and we called his doctor. He grew closer. I would pop some of his pimples for him sometimes. I told my best girl friend and she went to ask him what the hell was going on,he said he felt akward and weird and didn't know what to do at the momment and that he didn't like me. She showed me the text messages. I cried and I didn't want to know anymore. Days went by and things got better.We still act like a married couple but I don't let him lead me on. I still love him and I don't know what to do. I am nice to him and he still does things like if I was his boyfriend. When I go somewhere he always ask were I am going because he must always know. When I got my haircut from my friend he directed him how to cut my hair so it would be how "we wanted it". We go out to dinner in groups and we share food and I teach him how to properly eat and he shows me what he thinks I will like to eat. I don't know what to think; is he bi, gay? Does he like me back? Or he is just being friendly? He is also muslim and sometimes I think his religion is what stops him from coming out. Everyone thinks he is gay and should just come out but I don't know and it is just hurting me to just stand here like a fool. What do you think I should do?