All threads merged here.

I'm scared I love boys but I find myself looking at a girls or their boobs and get shocked that I am and turn away does that mean I'm lesbian? I only think boys are hot but some times I think girls are better looking then me and so I stare at them jealously but I can imagine be in a relationship with them. I'm not against lesbians I think they are equal I just find it disgusting to see myself a one. I heart beats fast when a hot guy walks by but since I'm so scared. I know for a fact I don't want to kiss or date a girl. My mind plays tricks on me making me believe that I like girls but I don't can someone help me I'm desperately scared I do t want to be one

I'm attracted to my own boobs does that mean I'm gay? I like touching them and looking at them

You don't sound like a lesbian to me. The biggest factor is that you like boys and have no interest in kissing girls.

It's perfectly normal to look at other women and see how they look, and what you like and don't like about them.

I suspect that you may not have had breasts yourself for that long, so you are naturally curious about them.

Are guys gay because they like masturbating?

Short answer no :)

Some of my friends started to ignore me and so I started to think bad about myself. I started to feel bad about my 170 weight.. my best friend says I don't look my weight.anyway to get to the point. I thought people thought I was weird that Im ugly and fat. That I won't get a hot skinny guy because I'm fat. Ect. And that all my friends hate me. And because I think this some of my friends walk away. It's getting really hard not to think badly about myself since ibeen bullied all my life. I need help I don't want to cry about this anymore

Bullying how?

Thanks your comment helped me feel better

People called me stupid because I have a learning disablity and they called me fat and worthless and during my middle school years everyone discluded me from everything so when I started high school I didn't know what's was cool or not.

I lost my voice because I'm so scared what people might say and my new best Friend questions me why Don't talk sometimes.

So how did you deal with and how are you dealing with the bullying? (Please use the Answers box, not the box, not the Comments box. You'll get more room to type.)

Well I learned not to give up who I am as a person that's how I got through with it but now that some people are ignoring me in this different school I get this fear that the bullying will happen all over again even if I have wonderful friends and that I'm happy in that school.I'm guessing that fear on top of how I feel about myself is what giving me problems between the people around me.

It sounds like you are trying to be very brave. How do you act toward others? How are your grades in school?

I'm nice to others

You know how it feels when someone doesn't treat you in a nice way, don't you.

Have you ever talked with a teacher or another adult about any of this?

I'm a girl.
I have fan-girls.
I watch girls walking around me all the time.
And sometimes I even want to hug them tightly.
But am I a lesbian?
No.
I had boyfriendS before. And I love boys.
Don't worry. It's normal to have feelings like yours, but that doesn't make you lesbian or anything.

Being fat isn't a crime. But it's not exactly healthy either. And by this I mean I think you should lose weights. Not because of those people. But for yourself.
If you have any talent, don't be afraid to show it.
If you have something to say, speak up.
People only bully those who they think do not have either the pride or the strength to stand up for themselves. So you should keep your head up high (not too high though =.. =, you might get bullied for that too)
I study in this luxury school where everyone is rich and wears fashionable clothes etc, and every move you makes is observed by a lot of people, but that doesn't matter, because to me, I believe this:
"Be who you are and do what you want. Because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"

Yes I have

My friends say I don't look my wieght at all but I'll lose someweight so I can feel better about myself. And thank you so much for the tips! =). I feel better now thanks

I'm overweight and I constatly get this worry that a hot skinny guy won't fall for me because around my area the guys get the tall skinny popular girls. I'm neither popular tall or skinny.I cry a about this often... I'm also very shy and I don't talk much but extreamly loving and caring. When I get shy or don't know people well I talk and ask general questions like hi what's new it's sunny today. I think guys would want a girl who outgowing and talks. I'm scared that a guy won't love me.

It's all about confidence really. As you get older, guys will be less shallow but for now, no matter how you look, when you don't trust yourself, people (not only guys) feel it.

It shows in the way you walk, talk and the way you act around others. Try to overcome your shyness if you want people to notice you. Don't be scared around people, remember No one is better than you.

No biggie, glad I could help

There are all types of preferences out there. Some guys prefer heavier women, some skinny minnies. Some people put too much emphasis on looks and not enough on the person. Panhead is right - it's just shallow.

In your post, I noticed that you said you're worried that a "hot skinny guy" won't fall for you. Maybe you need to look beyond the exterior too.

Sounds to me like you don't love yourself, or think very highly of yourself. If you have a problem with being overweight, why don't you do something about it? You deserve to be happy with yourself and you will never find someone to love you if you can't first love yourself.

It isn't all about looks. I can't speak for all the guys in the world, but I love confident, driven women who know they NEVER need a guy to validate themselves worth. I think the key to your goals are to boost your own self confidence first.

Your still young, and I can remember how important being accepted meant. Actually when you are looking for a potential partner it shouldn't depend on his looks. Take a closer look at how he presents himself, Im not talking clothes, does he appear to have confidence in himself without being cocky. Does he seem to be laughing and having fun with friends, without having to drink and be stupid. Integrity is a life long value that you should be looking for it will always be there, even under wrinkles and grey hair!!

Its time for you to recognize your own worth, stop depending on what others standard are, the only ones that count are yours at the end of day. Stop sitting back, watching and wishing for something that is never going to just come to you like magic. You are going to have you do something about it YOURSELF! If you feel that your overweight, then get a workout buddy, if you feel your shy, take a class that will help you be able to speak in public atmospheres. Ask a school counselor for advice on how you can get started, you have to take those first foot steps yourself!!

If the guys you're after only care about looks, then they are not the right guys for you. Plain and simple. Relationships based solely on looks are only fueled by lust anyway. That all fades after a while.

Like others have said: Build up your confidence. Look beyond looks. Get out, make friends and have fun. If you do those few things a great guy will come along.

All teenage girls question their sexual preference at one point or another. No, I don't think you're a lesbian, I think you might just be curious, looking at other girls bodies is just curiosity.. subconsciously you're actually comparing yourself to them which is the "jealousy" you mentioned.. there's nothing wrong with that. If your preference is men and you have no intention on kissing/dating a girl then you're not gay.

I cry a lot about things so I like having friends I could tell how I feel. And since I been bullied before I have this constant fear of losing friends for little things so I say sorry a lot. My friends tell me not to say sorry a lot but I don't think they understand why I get nervous breakdowns and say sorry. I have this best friend who I talk to when I feeling down who always listens to me and I tell her the truth about how Im feeling about things. One day I found out the guy I love to death is Muslim and since I am christian I can never be with him. I told my friend this and she help me feel better but then all of a sudden she started to feel bad about it and stopped talking to me and getting mad at me. I kept telling her to not feel bad because I don't feel bad anymore. The once we settled things we started talking about that guy I like and she began to talk about the guy she liked too. Then I told her that I won't feel bad if I don't get the guy. And then she stopped texting me. I said my sorries again and when and cried soooo much. I don't think this behavior is normal. I wouldn't be like this if it wasn't for the bulling and loneliness I thought she would do the same things she did when I told her about the guy. Then Im afraid I overreacted and shell leave me. I need help soooooon this just happened today dec 7... she doesn't forgive things like this easily. I wish there was someone out there that can give me sweet caring words that can cheer me up and calm me down as well as a solution to this problem. Also I need help with dealing with my broken heart for this guy. Thanks =)

Different looks are attractive to different people. One day you'll find someone who likes you exactly the way you look. You might also find after a while of not finding someone attractive, they become attractive to you as you get to know them better. It's like their personality shines out and they become irresistible. I'm sure this will happen to you at some point, or someone else will get to know you and it'll happen to them!

To make this more likely though you need to work on yourself esteem. If you're genuinely overweight and it makes you miserable then try a sensible diet or a bit of exercise. You don't have to be extreme about it. Also you'll find if you treat yourself well and with respect then others will too. So when you do get interest from a boy, make sure he's not a total tool cos you'll end up getting hurt and that'll in turn damage yourself esteem. Also sleeping around or kissing a lot of people isn't a good idea. I've done the latter and they weren't my proudest moments. In fact, myself esteem plummeted, as I just felt like an object. Sometimes less is more.

Do things you enjoy with friends, dress a bit nicer than normal for no reason sometimes and you'll feel your confidence rising. You don't have to believe you're beautiful, but if you give off an air of confidence you'll in turn become more confident. After that you can try a bit of flirting which believe me works absolute wonders for yourself esteem, just don't take it too far if you're not really interested in them.

Oh and never undervalue kindness. I think it's the most important thing in the world, and if you have that, you WILL be loved.

By looking at my questions do I seem depressed? I cry everyday about something or another. Then for the rest of the day I'm bubbly and happy till something else makes me cry. I can't tell anyone my true feelings
I try to tell my mom she get mad at me and say I am a drama queen and unreasonable which makes me feel worse.
I feel like I hopeless sometimes... Im scared to be depresses I don't want to be.

First a friend is a friend no matter what your views are. If you like this guy and you can't get passed the fact he's of a different religion then you have to tell yourself to accept the fact that you can't date him because of that. There is nothing saying that you can't date him but it is your belief that Christians and Muslims shouldn't mix so just respect his religion a common term you might know of is love thy neighbor, as for your friend you can say sorry for any offence that you might have said to her and that you would like to continue this relationship because it means something to you should do this TO HER FACE. As for the constant sorry start by relaxing and if you honestly believe what you think then don't apologize but just make sure its not offending any one you say it to which is probably why your friend isn't answering you. Think before you answer or express your beliefs openly but know a true friend is someone who you can confine within and not have to worry about offending them..

Best of luck with the situation

In Addition to your nervous breakdowns you should go and see a doctor or shrink and talk to them.. it might be scary to u but it might help you in the long run

Again best of luck

Omg I'm so happy my friend help me realize that I don't have to talk much to be cool and that I don't need to worry about being me. Thanks guys for all the tips. Everyone's tips helped by the tooooooons!

No.. You don't sound like a lesbian. I mean I like to see girls too and I don't have the slightest interest to date,kiss or be in a relationship with one considering I'm one. I like to see what they have like their face, breast and other feature. It's OK to look even if you are a lesbian that is you're decision to make. So, don't worry cause you're not a lesbian.

That is normal it is just your hormones

It's hard to say what could be causing this. How old are you?

What type of things are making you cry, how old are you ?

Do you often look for attention ( thus your moms opinion of a drama queen) What would make your mom have that opinion

Friends/lonelyness/ I cry all the time about my weight stuff like that

Try talking to your mother again,only this time ask her for ideas and tips you can use.

Pick a time when things are quite around the house,then just say,mum I have this problem with my friends,what do you think?

As for your weight,are you over weight? Even if your not exercise will make you feel better,rope in a friend to go for a walk with you or your mum.

If school is the problem talk to a teacher or guidance councillor,that's what their there for.

Talking about it will help.

I agree with redhead.

Emotions can be overwhelming sometimes and keeping them to oneself and trying to deal with it internally can be very hard and unhealthy. Go through the correct channels and let those able to help you do so.

Keeping things bottled up usually makes the situation look or feel worse then it is. Your mother may not seem helpful but maybe it's the approach you've taken. You are in control of your life, if it's the weight issue then go for a walk/run, exercise, watch your eating habits, seek help from those in similar situations.

This goes for anything. If you feel lonely then participate in local social events, get out and live and have fun. I reliaze I don't know where you live so its hard for me to say what to do, but keeping yourself shacked away with your issues are ismply making them worse.

Good Luck!

My best best friend keeps putting her self down because the guy she has a crush on and loves just started dating someoneles. It's during finals so I'm afraid with all the emotion she is having she would fail. I hug her and try to make her laugh but I don't know if there is something else I should do or am I doing the wrong thing. I don't know if I'm showing the right amount sympathy. I think she is jealous because I just went through the same thing recently (I can't have him because of his religion though) and even with this I am always jolly and happy during the day. I cry at home but she doesn't know about that. But anyway is there anything I can do to help her?

Thanks for the help!! I really appreciate =) it but What if school hw is keeping me from exercising? I get no time for myself should I talk to a councillor about that too?

Thanks for all the help this makes me feel better! I try it.. the thing is I never get any time to exercise because of school. And I ask my mom about a diet plan,she just yells at me and say now is not the time but I feel I need one because I cry about it

Maybe I'll talk it out with her this christmas

Thanks for the ideas =)

Friends loneliness.. my mom saying stuff... not having time for my self( to exersise) because of school... school stress

It's been hard because myself esteem went down because the amount of bulling I went through and not having time to excersise because of school but I will try to work on it again to get it up like it was before thanks

Awww thanks for the help!! Most of this self esteem being low is because of the amount of bullying I went through but its not happening anymore but I'll try my hardest to work on my confidence! Thanks so much!

Talk to your mum or councillor let it all out,they can help you come up with a routine and a plan to help you feel better.

Ok thanks I'll do that

Be that same size or around there I look exactly like my mom when she was my age now.

Well honestly you can't do anything else. Just be with her, show interest to her problems, laugh with her and be serious if she needs it. Just stay being her friend. She must deal with this problem herself and she needs time to do so. You cannot make it quicker or anything. You can only make her feel loved.

Thanks she is better now because she found another guy to like lol

I have a best friend she is making bad decisions that would get her into trouble.. If I hang out with her would people think I'm the same? I don't want to leave her side though... I was going to stay her friend but not do what she's doing and just do what I think is right. I don't want to leave her because she has done so much for me and helped me come outside my shell she also is fun to be with and is extremely funny. The side of her that I know is the nice kind wonderful caring friend. She is truly what I wished for as a friend and I don't want to leave her just because of this. I think I should help her... I told her that its not the right thing to do and its not safe. Is that all I can do. I don't want cause any problems with our friendship.

Part of being mature and growing up is to know when to stand "with" a friend, and when to stand up for your values and morals.

If they are doing things that you know is wrong, and you are hanging out with them, yes, some will wonder what you are doing also.

I have the same problem, I am freaking out, I like to hug girls a lot and kiss the on the cheeks, I like to be really close to my girl friends but at the same time I love guys, without them I don't live... I have no idea if I want to be in a relationship with a woman I can imagine it though but I don't think I would ever kiss one, even though I did when I was small and once for an accident, I don't know what to do, its freaking my life out, I just like to stare though I always do that, and I was always a little tomboy whhen I was small
Im really scared
*** help

What if no one knows about it?

That is going to be something very difficult you will have to figure out on your own. If she does unsafe things, yes, people might assume you are doing the same thing. If you guys are still having fun together doing things you are comfortable with doing, I might not say goodbye just yet. She is trying to figure out who she is as a person and may make some mistakes along the way.

I don't talk much.. I don't watch things that other people do and I don't do Facebook (I want one so that I can have a better social life) I feel alone... I feel like crying when my friend is talking to someone else about a show that I never get to see. My friend says I'm always depressed. I feel like no one likes me... people laugh at me and stare at me like I'm a weirdo. I did nothing wrong. I feel like crying sitting in my desk worrying how people view me. I not popular. No one talks to me except my friends. I keep worrying my best friend won't like me because I get sad a lot. I'm not popular in school, they don't like me when I've been nice to them. I don't know what to do to stop this feeling of sadness for a while it was gone then it came back. I don't have anyone to talk to all day until lunch with my friend. Except now I keep worrying that my best friend like this other girl more than me because she acts like me without the sad depressed part. She is also considered weird by others. I leave her out because she makes me want to cry when I'm with her and my best friend probably things I'm just being a bully. I been bullied by the tons and I wouldn't do it to anyone especially to her.I'm confused with life I need help

Have you ever spoken to your school counsellor or your parents about how you feel?

Everyone goes through a period in their lives where it seems their on a stage and everyone is looking at them, and not for all the right reasons.

Being bullied can have long lasting effects on your emotional and mental help, dealing with your feelings now will give you a good foundation for dealing with problems and issues that crop up later in life.

We all need help from time to time, talking about it and getting the tools to deal with negative feelings will really help.

Try and make an appointment today.

Let's tackle some of this one by one.
1- You want to do Facebook but haven't. Start! I didn't want to either but am glad now I did.
2- Of course there are shows you never get to see, because there are too many for each of us to see all of them, and I don't get HBO and expensive cable either, and don't go to the movies, and can't talk about every show everyone I know has seen. You have to drop this idea that you have to be part of every single conversation.
3- Being popular isn't all it's cracked up to be, and only a few people get to be popular, right?
4- No one talks to you except your friends?? Friends are what matter. TREASURE them, even if you only have ONE. More precious than diamonds and gold.
5- Most important: let your best friend be friends with others too. Jealousy will kill a friendship in two seconds if you let it. You feel sad around her because you are jealous. It's OK to tell her that you hope she is still your friend, and give her a hug, and say you will try not to be jealous.

Being bullied when you were younger does make it really really tough now, and I do feel for you. Depression is very real. Ask the school nurse if there is any counselor you can see. The sooner you get help with it the better. It will help you understand how hurt and anger turn to depression, and how it's those emotions held in.

Thanks for the tips... Im not allowed to get a fb but that's OK.. plus I have told my friend everything... have told my friend about my depression but I'm worried that she's anoyed with it.. Even if she says it doesn't and I'm a awesome friend. I guess I just got jelous because I thought she liked and had more fun with Conversations then with our random talk.

I have but my parents yell and me saying it's silly.. I guess it is but knowing that Doesn't help the fact that it hurts... councilor I have for the bullying part but not for this the truth is I'm scared of her for some reason

Thanks so much for the help and kind words

Some people can seem so busy that from the outside looking in it looks like their the last person you think you could talk too, the counsellor is trained to know how to spot and tackle the problems your having, give it a go, all you need to a pinch of courage to get the ball rolling.

Your friend probably did not know what to say, she may have been a little frightened by what you said, once she has time to process she may be the friend you hope she is.

As for your parents, tackle that one again, maybe the parent you feel closest too, or an aunt or grandparent.

An older generation can sometimes surprise you, you never know who will help you and have your back unless they know.

Even though a girl has a low self esteem will a guy still fall in love with her

Is this a general question?
If so,yes,some guys will.

Yes guys can fall for a girl with low self esteem, but your personal issues may get in the way and cause problems, unless you talk to someone that can guide you in the right directions for yourself. You have to be in love with yourself first, and be doing good things for yourself, before you can share love with another, and really enjoy it.

Got someone to help you with your confidence, and self esteem??

I have my friend but my worries overide her help and I feel bad for it she doesn't know how to help me anymore and I'm afraid this self esteem problem will ruin our friendship, I don't want to lose her as a friend!!

I would suggest to first find out what your worries are, and why you worry about it, instead of finding ways to resolve those worries and keep them in perspective.

One thing I can say from reading your posts, are a lack of balance and guidance, as in having a mentor, or someone you look up to, that's more experienced, and accomplished in ways you admire. You also have to have physical outlets to direct your energies outward, and not inward, and you would be surprised at the change that would make on your thinking, as happy, busy people have little time to worry about things that can be resolved with a plan, and some actions.

Once you get that balance and direction, you will learn about yourself, and build a life that you enjoy, and grow, and be to busy to worry about the things you cannot control, and develop some rather good habits, and coping strategies, that will lead to skills you will use forever.

The sooner you start down such a path, the sooner you start seeing things get better.