Fathers Day back in June of 2009 my sons father and my new boyfriend got into a texting argument about the fact that my sons father didn't want or have the time to spend with our son on Fathers Day - That led to my sons father freaking out and trying to go after my boyfriend when he came to drop off my son early that afternoon - Nothing happened as far as a fight goes because I took as much control of the situation as I could and fought my sons father from going into my house with the bat . That day he finally left and has not came to see my son at all anymore . It's not Nov 2011 and my son still hasn't seen his father - I have tried countless times to somehow get in contact with my sons father to come and see my son because my son asks for him all the time and wants to know why daddy doesn't want to see him . I have also been to child support court on about 4 diff occasions - somehow he got served for court the first time I went and the court said that it was OK that he didn't show up after being served . Well since then he has jumped from place to place hiding from me and there's no way I can find him . My question is - is there a certin amount of time that he can run and hide from us before considering it child abandonment ? My son did nothing wrong and doesn't understand why - being only 4 years old now ! I also don't know what to do - if I could get some kind of an answer to what it is I should do I would really appreciate it . **** email deleted *** FC

Child abandonment is a state law, and in most cases means that a child is left alone, like at walmart and you drive away, not just not visiting the child.

In some states it also means non payment of court ordered child support. In those cases, they can issue an arrest warrant for them for non payment of support,

But it has nothing to do with how long he has not seen the child.

In the civil meaning, it may be used to ask the courts to change the level of custody or reduce the other partners visitation rights.

So what are you wanting for this, you currently don't see or even know where he is,

First, you have custody, and your ex-husband has visitation rights. He has not abandoned the child by not exercising his visitation rights. If he does not pay his child support obligations, you can take him to court. That is the legal situation. On a personal level, you might solve this problem by not having your boyfriend at the house when your ex-husband picks up the child and returns the child. This is insulting and disrespectful to him, and you probably know that. If you want him to act responsibly, you might start by doing so yourself. Meanwhile, your selfishness in only thinking of yourself is damaging the child emotionally. I have seen this countless times in my 25 years as an attorney.