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damiancurzytek
Jan 3, 2007, 05:56 PM
I am with this girl for 2 months. I Love her. I mean I really do. I love her for being sweet and kind to me but I'm not sure if she feels the same about me... She told me she loves me but I'm her first boyfriend and she is really shy. She is really shy to kiss me, and she tries to finish the kiss very quickly. We were talking about this. She told me that she is afraid to do anything wrong. But love is about being confident and being comfortable with that other person... She is shy to ask me to go out with her somewhere or even start holding me. She said she will try to be less shy but its weeks and weeks now... what shall I do? I did talk to her. I can't force her to be less shy but I would expect my girlfriend to show me she loves me.

Please Help

Damo

missb
Jan 3, 2007, 08:17 PM
Maybe you should give her some time to feel comfortable enough to just let go and be herself especially since you're her first boyfriend. But don't rush things.

JoeCanada76
Jan 3, 2007, 08:25 PM
It defiantly takes time. Patience and Love. So if you truly love her, then what you will do is ease up, give her some room to breath and just go with the flow. Everybody goes at a different pace and what you need to show is your Patience with this girl and care for her. As the above said. Do not rush things.

Joe

lburkins
Jan 3, 2007, 10:55 PM
I am with this girl for 2 months. i Love her. i mean i really do. I love her for being sweet and kind to me but im not sure if she feels the same about me... She told me she loves me but im her first boyfriend and she is really shy. She is really shy to kiss me, and she tries to finish the kiss very quickly. we were talking about this. she told me that she is afraid to do anything wrong. But love is about being confident and being comfortable with that other person.... She is shy to ask me to go out with her somewhere or even start holding me. she said she will try to be less shy but its weeks and weeks now... what shall i do? i did talk to her. i can't force her to be less shy but i would expect my girlfriend to show me she loves me.

Please Help

Damo
Take thing slow it will all fall in place.You have to take in count that you all have been dating for 2months. Just give it a little time. It will all workout. Don't put a lot of pressure on the relationship. Just relax and let things be as they may. When you are in a hurry things never go right. Just chill and continue to talk to her about your feelings.

chuff
Jan 3, 2007, 11:35 PM
I am with this girl for 2 months. i Love her. i mean i really do. I love her for being sweet and kind to me but im not sure if she feels the same about me...

This is not a knock on either of you but your infatuated with each other. Love takes longer than two months. Not saying it can’t be love but don’t confuse reality with fantasy.


She told me she loves me but im her first boyfriend and she is really shy.

So appreciate and admire that you have a girl who doesn’t see the need to act like a complete fool to get attention. Play to and tell her the strengths of being shy.


She is really shy to kiss me, and she tries to finish the kiss very quickly. we were talking about this. she told me that she is afraid to do anything wrong.

So she’s thinking about how this affects you. She’s afraid of rejection, which ironically may play into why she’s shy. So tell her that she can’t do wrong and then back it up by your actions.


But love is about being confident and being comfortable with that other person....

Which your clearly not.

Yeah you didn’t expect that answer did you. Your complaining about her but shyness and criticizing her confidence level but your not being a man and showing her the confidence it takes for her to feel secure around you. Your giving her either through words or actions self doubt. You already appear to be pushing her into something instead of reassuring her. Show her you’ve got confidence in her if you want some back. Show her you’re a man and quit whining about all this and reinforce all the good things she does. Build her confidence, don’t complain that she doesn’t have it.


She is shy to ask me to go out with her somewhere or even start holding me. she said she will try to be less shy but its weeks and weeks now...

Are you kidding me? Are you one of those people I see in the mall desperate for attention that can’t do anything for themselves and is constantly attached to the other person. Be a man and do things with her and don’t always expect her to hang on you all the time. Create attraction in her by showing her that you appreciate her and are able to be with her without all these demands.


what shall i do? i did talk to her. i can't force her to be less shy but i would expect my girlfriend to show me she loves me.

Please Help

Damo

I would expect you to act like a man and not set up stupid rules for someone who has problems or resists interacting in social situations.

Look I’m not trying to be a hard on you because I believe you have the best intentions or want the best intentions from your girlfriend. But she’s shy for a reason. It may be just her personality or it may be she has a huge fear of rejection so she holds back. If it’s her personality than you appreciate and honor that. You have no right to change that so that you feel better. If she’s shy because of rejection and you really care for her than you take the time to help