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Aneeqah
Oct 27, 2010, 03:53 PM
From the begnning my mother used to love my younger sister as she used to help her financially and in her house hold works I never got time to do all that as I was always busy with my studies now it's 5years I amhappily married and my sister got married last year .2 months ago I had a huge fight with my mother for I feel she taunt me and even cursed me saying that all days won't be same she is never happy if I gift her something is she jealous of my happinesss what should I do ?I am 4 month pregnant and will have my 2 child shall I ignore her ,stop talking to her or...

Enigma1999
Oct 27, 2010, 04:08 PM
From the begnning my mother used to love my younger sister as she used to help her financially and in her house hold works I never got time to do all that as I was always busy with my studies now it's 5years I amhappily married and my sister got married last year .2 months ago I had a huge fight with my mother for I feel she taunt me and even cursed me saying that all days won't be same she is never happy if I gift her something is she jealous of my happinesss what should I do ?I am 4 month pregnant and will have my 2 child shall I ignore her ,stop talking to her or ...........


I don't think that it's common, as my Mother wants to see me succeed in life and is happy for me.

Are you sure that this isn't something that you concocted in your head?

I just can't imagine a Mother or Father for that matter being jealous of their children's happiness.

I'm not saying that it has never happened before, I just can't imagine it.

I really do think that you should ask her if that's how she feels, not tell her how she feels, ask her.

Make sure when you are asking that you use words like, "I feel, I'm concerned, Is this how you feel, or how do you feel" not words like," you are, you're always".

I do think that you need to talk to her about it. When you two are alone. No husband, Father, or Sister around. Also speak to her in a calm manner.

Some times things can be taken the wrong way between parents towards other siblings.

Does that make sense?

Enigma1999
Oct 27, 2010, 04:09 PM
Also, keep in mind that you are pregnant, and pregnancy can make women very emotional.

Aneeqah
Oct 28, 2010, 06:13 AM
Thanks dear for your answer but I don't think it's helpful as at present I can't have a personal talk with her when I will go to my home country I will try to talk to her which I will do most probably in month of July I visit my home country once in a year.she is least bother she never calls me I have called her twice in last 2 months shall I stop calling her or...

Enigma1999
Oct 28, 2010, 07:59 AM
Thanks dear for your answer but I don't think it's helpful as at present I can't have a personal talk with her when I will go to my home country I will try to talk to her which I will do most probably in month of July I visit my home country once in a year.she is least bother she never calls me I have called her twice in last 2 months shall I stop calling her or.......

I'm sorry I wasn't much help to you...

Perhaps someone will read your post and give you a better answer.

If you have tied to open up to her and she is not excepting, then you have done what you can... for now.

I wish you luck.

Devorameira
Oct 28, 2010, 08:20 AM
It’s really hard to know for sure what’s going on with her, but I don’t think it’s all that uncommon for a parent to have some little negative feelings toward their children, but most parents overshadow those feelings with positive loving ones. All human beings (including mothers) are prone to feelings of jealousy, envy and resentment.

Most mothers do want the best for their children, but she may feel regret for opportunities she’s missed or goals she didn’t reach. She may be feeling bad about how her own life has turned out and is taking it out on you.

I’m sure it’s really painful to have your mother acting with hatefulness and spite toward you, but this isn’t about you. It is about your mother and her own feelings of unhappiness.

If your mother is truly unable to be happy for you, you will be better off if you don’t share too many positive details of your life with her. Don't shut her out of your life, but stick to more neutral topics when you do talk to her. I hope one day that she’ll realize what she’s been doing.

Good luck!

Aneeqah
Oct 28, 2010, 12:18 PM
Thanks devorameira I think you are right she is also a human being and thanks again Ur answer helped be a lot mentally I won't cut off with her as she had helped me in my needs... but I am upset when ever I think about her.let me say you one thing... do you know how she used to punish me... with red chili power in my both eyes... I never said this to any one not even my husband for he may not respect her... say me why might she used to do that it hurts me when ever I remember that and moreover I have a 4 year daughter I can not even think of giving such punishment to my daughter. How can I erase all that from my mind?