View Full Version : Am I a victim of my husbands verbal abuse
raychelann
Oct 24, 2010, 09:20 PM
My husband and I have been married for over 7 yrs.I am 38 and he is 28. I have been married 1 other time for 10 yrs. I was raised in a very stable close family. My husbands parents are divorced and his mother was very mentally abusive with him when he was young, We have a 7 yr old daughter together. I know I am not the easiest person to live with but in the past year I have found myself letting A LOT of things "roll of my back" that I would not have back then. Example would be every night (he works midnights) I am the one to get him up for work. He can set his alarm but will sleep through it so I stay awake to make sure he is up. He NEVER wakes up in a good mood. He acts mad to have to be going to work, He has gotten mad at me thrown things, broke things and when our daughter wanted to lay in bed with me and not him he stated that "i guess you don't love me:. He has (a hand full of times) told our daughter I am a *****, or that he was leaving. He has never left for anylonger than a few hrs, I feel as a parent that (I have 2 daughters by my 1st marriage) I don't think our child should hear or see us argue, I can put on a smile and go on and he cant! He has a short temper and somenights if I will wake him up and act like I am asleep until he leaves to avoid confrontation, Please help! I need suggestions. Thank you
YeloDasy
Oct 24, 2010, 09:55 PM
If you feel that he is treating you less than you deserve, then I think you have a right to have a voice about it. What do YOU want, and what do YOU want to do?
metroidprime
Oct 25, 2010, 12:56 AM
Maybe he should get a better job and not be such a dooch just because he gets a little pissed
jelly1bean
Oct 27, 2010, 02:20 PM
Verbal, Emotional, and Mental abuse are very serious. The can take a great toll on you and effect you not just a the time they are "lashed out" but for days, weeks, months and years later. I know, and I feel for you as I am sure others do that have been through it. The childhood saying about "sticks and stones" must not have been through verbal, emotional, and mental abuse. No one deserves that. You really need to get away from that situation. If not just for yourself but for your children. They don't need to be a witness to that. You really need to get out that situation, before the abuse turns from you to them.
Homegirl 50
Oct 27, 2010, 07:00 PM
When you put up with disrespect you are teaching your daughters that this is normal and acceptable.
You have a choice in this. You can suggest counseling and stick it out or you can leave.
Marriage is sacred but I don't think anyone ought to stay in an abusive one or one where you are are being disrespectful.
How does he feel about counseling? He sounds like an angry person. It might help to find out why this is so.
talaniman
Oct 29, 2010, 10:36 AM
Maybe you have fallen into a bad habit of accepting bad behavior but you better tell him exactly what your feeling and why, because he may not be able to see that his actions are stupid, and unacceptable to you. Talk honestly, and if he doesn't change, put him and the alarm clock, on the porch.