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jrhill1
Oct 17, 2010, 11:13 AM
Heyy guys, thanks in advance for any help. I'm just stuck in a real rut. My ex boyfriend ended probably three months ago, and we were together for three and half years. I did the breaking up, and when I realized I had made a mistake, he wouldn't take me bak because I hurt him so bad. The reason we broke up is because he told me he had voices in his head and had conversation with them, oh and he was being told t hurt me. Besides that he treated me so well, and I just can't get over that. The first month was the easiest because I still lived in the same town. He knew I was leaving and we were going to do long distance. Another reason we didn't get back together because he didn't want our relationship to be sour when I left. I moved across the country. To date I'm having a really hard time with it. Everything reminds me of him and how I want him back. Every night I dream about him and it's us fighting about getting back together. I think my dreams are making it worse, if I didn't have his image in my mind every day it my help. I have taken steps to try and get over him such has deleted him from everything. I can not see him, because I don't want to know what he is doing. I know he had a rebound a week after we broke up with the girl I can not stand. Is there any advice about making this easier? I lost my everything to him, and he was my everything. I know I shouldn't be with him as well my parents couldn't stand him, my friends no one. I just wish it wasn't this hard.

dhuber
Oct 17, 2010, 11:23 AM
I am concerned about these "voices". Voices can be a sign of serious psychiatric problems - especially when he is answering them or thinks the are telling him to do things. These can be a sign of serious disorders such as schizophrenia. I don't know how old you are but these can start in the late teens or early 20's and get worse.

As far as what others think of him,although it would be nice they are not the ones dating him. However it will be a long road if everybody doesn't like him so decide if you are ready for this forever.

It sounds like you guys have moved on especially him. Never let anyone be your world. Find other things to do and think about other people that would help this process. You can't move on if you are stuck in the pity party. Don't let him put you on a roller coaster ride. A long distance relationship is hard for even trusting relationships. It doesn't sound like there is enough trust here for that. Move on

Homegirl 50
Oct 17, 2010, 11:29 AM
Sounds like this guy has some psychological issues and I do hope he is getting professional help.
It will take time for these feelings to fade. It will get easier with time.
I wish you well.

talaniman
Oct 17, 2010, 12:59 PM
It may seem very hard after 3 months to be over someone you shared so much with for so long, but if you hang in there another 3 months it will get better. I think its more where you are at, and the pressure of regrouping, and rebuilding a life that you enjoy, with friends and activities, that make you happy, and look forward to, That's at the heart of your feelings of missing having someone to lean on, during uncertain times.

Just keep building and working on yourself. It will get better.

beachloverjohn
Oct 17, 2010, 02:56 PM
I would be very concerned to be with someone that hears voices that tell him to hurt me. That is enough of a reason to get him out of your head. Now you need to listen to the other things his voices are saying. They are saying " It's over between us, I am not going back with you because i won't give you a second chance to hurt me, and you live to far away, and I am over you so leave me alone" Sounds like good advice to me.

You should also listen to the little voices in YOUR head. They are saying, "move on, this guy is not for you"