View Full Version : What does this mean?
swtlilsoni
Oct 15, 2010, 09:54 AM
My ex accused me of doing something I did not do. When I tried to prove to him it wasn't me, he said "I don't care that much, you don't have to go through all this effort to prove some point to me". I then said that I don't want him to hate me for something I didn't do. He said "I don't hate you, I just don't care anymore. There has been too much of a coincidence for me to forget about it and have no doubt left, and you and I just have to live with that. I'm sorry if this isn't your fault but it just doesn't matter to me anymore"
What does that mean? Because if someone tries to prove their innocence to me, and I say I don't care, that usually means I'm not mad anymore, or I don't hold it against them, or I don't think anything bad of them anymore (aka the incident doesn't matter). But it could also mean that he does think badly of me because of the incident, and he doesn't care whether I really did it or not, he is just going to think I did. And it doesn't matter whether that is right or not.
Eileen G
Oct 15, 2010, 10:00 AM
To be honest, it sounds as if the relationship is over. He thinks you might have done something, but doesn't really care enough about it to worry if you can prove you did or didn't do it.
He said "I don't hate you, I just don't care anymore." I think that sums it up.
The relationship is over, move on.
rebeccahstrean
Oct 15, 2010, 10:02 AM
Well you can't have it eat you up inside. If he doesn't want to see the proof then so be it. You just have to except that and go on with your life. You can't please everyone. And if he doesn't believe you but not telling yout that then that's his problem. You can't have any relationship with out trust and that's what it seems to me that it is. He doesn't want to see that it wasn't you cause he doesn't trust you. Or sometimes guys will just get mad at you and just stay that way for no reason. So your going to have to decide on what you want to do. Like try again, or just leave it alone and be like whatever and when he's ready you can prove it to him. Guys are complicated,. they need their space and when they're ready weather is to late or not they will tell you.
swtlilsoni
Oct 15, 2010, 10:24 AM
Eileen,
I know that the relationship is over, that's why he is my ex. But when you say "he doesn't care enough about it to worry whether you did it or not", do you mean he is cool with me and he doesn't care if I did it (he will stay cool with me either way). Or do you mean he is mad at me, but he doesn't care to find out whether I did it or not, he is just going to stay mad either way.
Rebecca,
When you said he doesn't trust me, do you mean he doesn't want to see the proof because he doesn't believe I have any? That kind of makes sense. And it is true guys are complicated, it's hard to understand how they feel..
Eileen G
Oct 15, 2010, 10:34 AM
You need to ask him, reading minds is very difficult. But it sounds as if the relationship has petered out, and he is indifferent to what you do. From what you've reported him as saying, he doesn't sound mad, just ready to end the whole relationship.
talaniman
Oct 15, 2010, 07:46 PM
He is telling you he doesn't care if it was true or not and isn't it time to leave this ex alone? What's it going to take to realize whether you prove anything or not, he doesn't care what you do?
Look, it sounds like your ex doesn't even want to be friends with you, nor want anything to do with you. Take the hint. You are ignoring the obvious.