View Full Version : Am I just using him to make myself feel secure and not lonely?
colleen17
Oct 1, 2010, 02:12 PM
Okay so since the very beginning I have had doubts and have just kept him around to see what happens.most of the reason I had doubts is because I care too much about what other people think so I felt embarrassed to be in any kind of relationship with him so I kept it behind closed doors... but I have been working and going to school so I don't hang out with any of those friends anymore. I call him all the time... and I feel like he has helped me grow as a person and I feel I have done the same for him. I just have so many mixed feelings and I don't know if its just because I think about everything to the craziest extent. Now, about 7 months later I still have those doubts but I feel like we have a strong relationship now. I am 19 years old a sophomore in college. Someone help.
talaniman
Oct 2, 2010, 01:12 PM
I do not understand having doubts, and having a strong relationship. Does he know of your doubts? What are they about? What are you intentions? Do you have a balanced life, besides him??
Do you have fun without him?
colleen17
Oct 4, 2010, 10:20 AM
Yea I told him I have doubts, I just talk to him about how I'm not sure... I think its because I care too much about what other people think. If I am happy it shouldn't matter. I have a pretty balanced life I work go to school and have a strong relationship with my mom and sister. My intentions are to be happy and to make someone else happy.. umm I don't have many friends right now as I have moved on from the negativity I have found being friends with people for the wrong reason.. but he has been growing as a person and I feel I am finally letting myself fall for him...
I have a hard time expressing my thoughts... if you haven't noticed.
talaniman
Oct 4, 2010, 10:41 AM
Yes I have noticed, and I think what your really looking for is reassurance that your not making a fool of yourself with this fellow. As long as your honest with yourself, and him (in that order), you will never be a fool, and can deal with whatever life throws at you.
Why? Because you know everything is a risk, but you have the courage to take that risk.
Why? Because its worth it to you. As long as it is you should enjoy it, when it becomes a burden, you don't enjoy it, and its no longer worth it, then you leave, and explore other options, and opportunities.
He has the same options that you do, so it must be worth it to him also. Have some faith, and confidence you will do what's right for yourself, you have so far.
colleen17
Oct 4, 2010, 02:38 PM
That really helped me. I think I am willing to give him a fighting chance. I feel I have messed with his head so far but if I stay honest and let myself be happy I think ill be okey letting myself be with him.