I've been very good friends with a guy for about ten years now. We messed around for the first time about 3 years ago. A bunch of our friends were hanging out at his place and drinking, and several of us spent the night. I asked if I could sleep in his bed (as opposed to fight over the couch), and he said OK. We talked for about a half hour before he made a move. The next morning, nothing seemed awkward, I gave him a big hug and left. This took place a few days after he, another friend and I had a conversation about sex and I had mentioned it had been awhile for me. At first, I felt that there was no way this could be anything more, because he was such a good friend. But I soon started to think I did really have feelings for him. Not long after this night, I moved about six hours away for school, so we didn't didn't see or talk to each other as often, but I feel we did become better friends. Every time I called, he sounded super excited and every time I came home he always invited me out to whatever he was doing. Before, I would generally just see him out with everyone, but at this point I would usually call him first. I see him pretty much every time I go home.
We messed around again about three months ago. I invited him to go to a wedding with me, because I was tired of going to weddings stag and I knew he would make a great date. He was my prom date in high school (nothing happened) but we had the best time out of anyone in our group. It was a family wedding, so he had to deal with my whole family, but he fit right in no problem. He was incredibly charming. He knew how much I wanted to dance, so he danced with me for over an hour making a total fool of himself. He even dragged my mom out on the dance floor and twirled her around a few times. At the end of the night, again kind of drunk, my mom drove us all home and I asked him to spend the night at my sisters. He kissed me in the car in front of my whole family. We went back to my sisters, and just ended up making out the whole night. The next morning, we cuddled a little, and I drove him home before heading back to school. This time I really knew that I had feelings for him.
We have never talked about either of these nights. Still, nothing has changed with our friendship. It's never awkward, he's always excited to see me, and always makes time for me. We're even planning a trip together to go visit another friend. We flirt, but we've always flirted. I want to pursue something more, my sisters want me to marry him, and I've had friends tell me they thought I've always had a crush on him. I don't know, however, if he feels the same. It's kind of hard to decipher the traditional "he likes you" cues because we do live so far away and I don't get to see him all the time. I, obviously, don't want to ruin a good friendship. I'm just not sure if these were just drunken occasions, or if it might have been something more to him too. Any thoughts?

Well unfortunately myself or someone else could only sit here and attempt to decipher what's going on... No way for us, or you for that matter to know what he is thinking. Either he has feelings and is stalling for the same reasons you are (or because is isn't into doing a long distance thing) or its just an occasional thing he does with a good friend and nothing more.

The only way you can really find out is to just ask him... It could possibly put a damper on your friendship if the feelings aren't mutual, or it could give you the answer you're looking for. Live life with no regrets and don't hold back, just ask and see where it goes. I don't think this would ruin your friendship either, perhaps make it a little awkward at first if it doesn't workout, but if he is as good a friend as you say then it would all blow over eventually.

Best of luck :)

You seem to be enjoying each other the way things are so just keep doing that and see what happens. Why force things when things are working good? No hurry. When the time is right you will talk.

Well I see 2 things happening here. I feel like by what you have explained I can decipher what is happening here. Being that I have been in similar situations like this there are 2 things that is happening. The first is:

1. He is acting on his feelings because he has had alcohol in his system to give him liquid courage. But he still wanted it therefore he does have some sexual interest in you and since you have sexual interest both ways and have friendship then he may need more signs from you when he isn't drinking to give him courage to make a move with you. Perhaps you're not giving out enough signals to tell him it's OK while he is around which is causing him to get mixed signals and doubt his ability to do anything with you without his liquid courage.

2. He is not interested in you because there is something you're doing that is keeping him from being attached. I don't want to get into too much detail but I knew a girl I "messed around with" I wasn't completely flattered by her sexually. I know that sounds so harsh and makes me looks bad when I say that but me and this girl are still friends but we were just bed buddies but I didn't want anything more from her because I wasn't interested in her as a mate just sex really. The sex wasn't great because her lack of grooming and motivation in bed. I hate to just be open and honest like this cause I feel like I am the worst person in the world to talk like that but I just want you to get the perspective in my head that I see with my girl friend. If you're lacking motivation in bed(aka dead fish)/grooming anything that could cause him to not be interested more than just as a friends.

Now stepping aside from that subject. If you can honestly look back and see anything that spikes a nerve in your head of something that might cause him to feel like that then that could be something you work on and the next time y'all mess around he may be more interested.

Now if none of this is the case... and everything you have been doing is on the up and up it may be that he just needs to be around you more. Spend more time with you. But he may feel that if he does anything he will lose your friendship as well just the same way you feel. The only way to know is to just take a step back and look at you and your situation from his perspective.

I agree with both answers above mine though... you can either just ask him and get it over with... or you can let things go the way they are going. It seems to me that the more time is going on the more you're messing around. So I'd say take care of yourself and just let things go the way they are and there is nothing wrong with asking him to come hang out or go to the movies. It's all about how fast you want things to go. Obviously he is somewhat interested in you or else he wouldn't be messing around with you. Good Luck with whatever you do and I am sorry again for being so harsh/shallow if you will with my explanation but I am just trying to give you another side of the attraction spectrum.Cheers!