Hello-
I've been in this situation for several months now and I'm not sure if it's time to move on, or if I should continue fighting for him.

We worked together for the summer, and the sparks were obvious. We have tons in common, could talk forever etc. But at work he was always extremely shy around me. He'd keep everything really short. And although we'd talk about meeting up at work, he'd always chicken out when it was actually happening.

Online, it's a totally different story. We talk for hours IM'ing.

Getting him to text me was difficult. I gave him my number in passing, and I almost had to force him to start texting me. Now he does all the time. But getting him to start was agonizing.

I saw him in person for the first time since the summer the other day, and surprisingly, he ran up to me when he saw me and opened his arms for one of the most intense, intimate hugs I've had. We spent an hour or so walking and talking and it was amazing. He said to call him if I was in the area and we could do coffee or something. Two days later I texted him and suggested that we go for coffee. His response? "Yeah, we'll see how it goes".

How can everything go from seeing so good, to seeming so bad? One part of me thinks that it's just his typical language. I don't want to follow-up, because I am the girl, and I am 5 years younger. But should I be chasing him? Or should I let it go? Part of me says to let it go, but the other part thinks that I might be missing out on something because he's too shy.

What do you all think?

I looked at your past threads and found that you should be about 17/18 years old now. That would put him about 22/23 years old.

While on-line have you asked him why he seems so different in person?

At first he never used to text me back. So I called him out on that. Now he always texts me back and responds.

I haven't asked him why he's different in person. I'm not quite sure how to approach it without freaking him out even more.

Sounds like you're in such a rush compared to him. It would work better if he felt the same way, but it seems more like he wants to take it slow.

Just keep getting to know each other better before you take the next step. I'm guessing you're still in high school and he's in college?

Just let your friendship develop naturally. You're putting too much pressure in developing this into an intense romantic relationship and that's setting yourself up for disappointment.

I think you're getting way ahead of yourself.

You hadn't heard from him since summer (I presume at least a month), and you accidentally run into him, talk for one hour or so, and then he says, in a very non-committal kind of way, to call you if you're in the area, and you'll do coffee.

So, you take that as a green light, and call him two days later, and he is not receptive.

I take it, the coffee thing was the same as the other times you've noted, when he dialed out and after work arrangements never happened when you worked with him.

I wouldn't have thought, when he said, 'call me if you're in the area', meant anything other than a friendly platitude, with no particular meaning. Even if just from his past history.

Unless I'm reading this all wrong, there has been no relationship develop beyond a period you and he texted.

He is old enough to pick up the phone, and ask you out on a date. Let's assume, that unless he is a monk, that he has had some experience in that department.

That he chooses not to pretty much give you even the benefit of his company over a simple cup of coffee, would tell me, that he is just not interested.

So unless you can read his mind and know somehow that he means the opposite of what he says, shows, and does, my advice is to either get a big caveman club and knock him out and drag him into the sunset (;)), or, let this non-relationship, go.