PDA

View Full Version : What does it all mean?


RaeRomanticLove
Sep 22, 2010, 01:50 PM
So I'm in college at an all girls school which majority of the girls are gay, bi or bi-curious and I have a crush on a girl that never told me her sexual orientation. She knows I like her but all she told me was that she was talking to someone. I hear things about her that she's atright, she has a boyfriend and that she's bi stuff like that but none of that came out of her mouth it was always what I had heard from someone. I've grown a really strong crush on her and I know she knows it. When we talk she always seems to flirt with me and I like it of course. There was a point in time where she basically made me choose between her and my ex and left me alone to choose and I chose her. Then there was a time where she called me on my room phone for something to drink when she has more friends in the dorm that has more drinks then me but she calls me anyway. I feel like that was a way to get me to come talk to her or for her to come to me for some reason, I don't know. And she told me if I don't say hi to her everyday she's going to punch me (in a joking way), she knows I'm shy and every time I see her I get nervous and try to avoid her, and she notices it. So my question is what should I do? And the little things she's doing what does that mean?

Jake2008
Sep 22, 2010, 02:35 PM
I don't think you will really know her intentions, unless you just ask her. It seems quite obvious that you are interested in her, for more than a friendship, and she is sending mixed signals, which doesn't make this easy for you to know one way or the other.

If she's just testing the waters, and unsure of her own sexuality, be sure that you are not being used. If it turns out she has a genuine interest in you, you need to know whether it is as a friend, or as a girlfriend.

My advice to you is to stop torturing yourself with guessing. You do deserve a straightforward answer to a simple question. That question would be, "I need to know whether or not you are interested in me, and if so, is it as a friend, or is it something more."

Maybe the bigger question here is, how will you handle the answer. If you are prepared for the possibility that she will reject you, both as a friend, and as a lover, then I would ask the question.

Not an easy position to be in; I hope you find the courage to find out one way or the other.

Homegirl 50
Sep 22, 2010, 02:50 PM
Sounds to me like she knows how you feel about her and she is toying with you.
Why would she make you choose between her and your ex, and use you as an errand girl to get her something to drink?

I think she is playing a nasty game with you and you need to get a clue.

RaeRomanticLove
Sep 22, 2010, 02:57 PM
She knows that I life her but I feel like she called me for a drink so that I can converse with her and give her some attention.

RaeRomanticLove
Sep 22, 2010, 02:59 PM
She said we can be friends already and that its fine if we get to know each other better. And now I'm afraid that if I asked that question it would make the frienship we have now awkward

Alty
Sep 22, 2010, 03:09 PM
If she does have a boyfriend than it really doesn't matter how she feels about you, unless you're okay with being the kind of person that breaks up a relationship, or is a little piece on the side.

Talk to her, ask her if she's seeing someone. If she is, you're friends and that's it. If she isn't, than ask her if she's interested in you.

You can't get anywhere by guessing what every little wink means. You have to ask. If you can't talk to her now, don't even bother trying to have a relationship with her.

wwhenry4
Sep 22, 2010, 03:13 PM
I am age 61, male, and traditional. The advice I followed was to marry someone of the opposite sex, having similar views regarding faith, religion, beliefs, sexuality, marriage, family, and good manners. This common faith has kept us together during tough times and easier times. She has the special trait of faithfulness, upon which I place high value; and I have been faithful to her. She is diligent, and persevering. Our love began with friendship, which remains. We look out for each other. We enjoy being together. Sexual attraction was of course there. We tried and succeeded to refrain until we were married. This saved us both from a lot of being "messed up".

When I was ages 7 through 25 I learned the Bible's teaching about male, female, personal beliefs, and marriage. These teachings go back to the beginning of time. They were not new, just new to me. They worked all these years and still work because they deal with the way we are made. I have enjoyed the advantage of following what works.
Present day problems are not new, just new to each person. If we follow good principles, we get the best outcome. If one wishes to have the best long term outcome, they may learn from their Maker, and from those people who have actually been successful. They are all around us. When you seek, you find. True love, joy, peace, truth and good are not far from any one of us.
I offer you my best wishes for true success.

Alty
Sep 22, 2010, 03:16 PM
I am age 61, male, and traditional. The advice I followed was to marry someone of the opposite sex, having similar views regarding faith, religion, beliefs, sexuality, marriage, family, and good manners. This common faith has kept us together during tough times and easier times. She has the special trait of faithfulness, upon which I place high value; and I have been faithful to her. She is diligent, and persevering. Our love began with friendship, which remains. We look out for each other. We enjoy being together. Sexual attraction was of course there. We tried and succeeded to refrain until we were married. This saved us both from a lot of being "messed up".

When I was ages 7 through 25 I learned the Bible's teaching about male, female, personal beliefs, and marriage. These teachings go back to the beginning of time. They were not new, just new to me. They worked all these years and still work because they deal with the way we are made. I have enjoyed the advantage of following what works.
Present day problems are not new, just new to each person. If we follow good principles, we get the best outcome. If one wishes to have the best long term outcome, they may learn from their Maker, and from those people who have actually been successful. They are all around us. When you seek, you find. True love, joy, peace, truth and good are not far from any one of us.
I offer you my best wishes for true success.

How does this address the OP's question?

You have your beliefs, and you're welcome to them, but if you're against homosexuals because of your religious beliefs, than stay of threads asking about homosexual relationships. Leave the preaching on the religious forum. :(

Homegirl 50
Sep 22, 2010, 03:48 PM
First of all please don't respond in the comment box.

RaeRomanticLove : she knows that I life her but I feel like she called me for a drink so that I can conversate with her and give her some attention.
She called you so you can give her attention. She made you choose between you and your boyfriend. This girl is manipulating you.
You two are not in middle school, you're not in High School. If she really wants you she will tell you. If you want to know where you stand with her, ask her. But stop being at her beck and call.

Jake2008
Sep 22, 2010, 08:03 PM
Wwhenry,

The OP has clearly stated she is in a school, where the majority of girls are gay, or bisexual. She is not pursuing a relationship with a boy, she wishes to pursue a relationship with a girl.

While I realize that the benchmark of your success has been in the traditional sense, and you are a firm believer in religion as it pertains to those beliefs and the success you have had, this predicament is purely one of communicating her desire to express her deepening feelings for another girl.

But, I agree with you, that I too, wish her my best wishes for great success.

RaeRomanticLove
Sep 29, 2010, 11:29 AM
Yeah I agree... I was reading it and saying what does this have to do with anything

RaeRomanticLove
Sep 29, 2010, 11:30 AM
Thank you