View Full Version : What can I expect in an EX parte hearings
anglynn
Sep 18, 2010, 04:26 AM
I live in Maryland and my wife left me with no indication that she was leaving she took my son with her. She then would not allow me to see my son and then filed for an ex parte. The hearing is on Tuesday and I would like to know what I can expect. Will the judge look at the text messages that she sent me ? Will he allow me to tell my side? Do I need to have a lawyer? Can my family be present and be a witness for me? I really appeciate your help . Thank you
cdad
Sep 18, 2010, 04:34 AM
What is the hearing for?
anglynn
Sep 18, 2010, 04:49 AM
It's an ex parte hearing my wife told the courts that she is in fear of her life and safety. I have never hit or hurt my wife the entire time we have been together so this entire thing is fabricated
cdad
Sep 18, 2010, 06:14 AM
Ok, first off ex parte means that hearing must be done quickly. That's why the motion is in that form. But it sounds like she has and is wanting a restraining order against you.
If that is the case read this first:
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-law/restraining-orders-499600.html
anglynn
Sep 18, 2010, 08:23 AM
Ok, first off ex parte means that hearing must be done quickly. Thats why the motion is in that form. But it sounds like she has and is wanting a restraining order against you.
If that is the case read this first:
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-law/restraining-orders-499600.html
Yes this is the case and I have read the page you sent me to , even printed it out for reference. I have not been able to get a lawyer because I just received the verbal summons Thursday and the case is on Tuesday I know what her reasons are for doing this 1) To gain custody of my son without going to court, 2) To manipulate me into moving. I don't even know the docket number of the case because the officer that contacted me read the summons and didn't serve me with papers. I have had no trouble with the law and I really don't know what to expect and that's really the bases of my question is what to expect during this hearing. How would I get the application and affidavit without the docket number? I want my son or to at least see him and make sure he's OK I have so many questions and fears I just don't know what to do Thank you for letting me bend your ear and your advice
ScottGem
Sep 18, 2010, 08:59 AM
You go to to court and get the docket number and other information about the case. It would be best if you have an attorney especially if your wife has one. But you can explain to the judge that this is happening too fast and you haven't had a chance to engage an attorney.
If your wife is seeking a restraining order your defense is that there is no evidence, no police records, no medical records that can back up her claims. The bad news is you are likely to lose this one. A judge is likely to err on the side of caution in a case like this and may issue a TRO. It is unlikely that you will be able to present any witnesses at such a hearing. So all you can do is be polite to the court, maintain your composure, and ask where's the beef (the evidence) to back up her claims.
If the judge does issue the order do not be overly concerned, this is only the opening salvo in what will probably be a long drawn out battle. The order will be temporary. You need to ask for a new full hearing where you can present evidence to disprove her claims. Also asked for supervised visitation with your son. Ask that a GAL (guardian ad liteum) be appointed to represent the child's interests.
You may also need to counter file your own divorce petition.
But the bottom line to remember is this is not a major problem for you. Its simply the first action in the war. Do not worry about the hearing or the result. As long as you maintain your composure and calmly deny the allegations asking for proof of them, you will make an impression on the court.
anglynn
Sep 18, 2010, 09:17 AM
You go to to court and get the docket number and other information about the case. It would be best if you have an attorney especially if your wife has one. But you can explain to the judge that this is happening too fast and you haven't had a chance to engage an attorney.
If your wife is seeking a restraining order your defense is that there is no evidence, no police records, no medical records that can back up her claims. The bad news is you are likely to lose this one. A judge is likely to err on the side of caution in a case like this and may issue a TRO. It is unlikely that you will be able to present any witnesses at such a hearing. So all you can do is be polite to the court, maintain your composure, and ask where's the beef (the evidence) to back up her claims.
If the judge does issue the order do not be overly concerned, this is only the opening salvo in what will probably be a long drawn out battle. The order will be temporary. You need to ask for a new full hearing where you can present evidence to disprove her claims. Also asked for supervised visitation with your son. Ask that a GAL (guardian ad liteum) be appointed to represent the child's interests.
You may also need to counter file your own divorce petition.
But the bottom line to remember is this is not a major problem for you. Its simply the first action in the war. Do not worry about the hearing or the result. As long as you maintain your composure and calmly deny the allegations asking for proof of them, you will make an impression on the court.
Not what I wanted to hear but thank you I was hoping to get this thrown out for lack of evidence but if I prove that she is doing this because she wants to get the upper hand in a custody battle or manipulation do you think that will help me? I really want this over before it's begun I know but I am really uncomfortable with all this because I am in an unknown area and we haven't even done anything as far as a divorce! She left me the Friday before last then almost a week later hits me with this I don't know if she has a lawyer or anything. I do know I am filing for custody of my son
ScottGem
Sep 18, 2010, 09:35 AM
You may get it thrown out. If there is no evidence at all, the judge may not buy it. I just wanted to prepare you that even if you do lose this round its not the end of the war. As long as you go into this for the long haul and realize that, you will be able to approach this more calmly. The most important thing is to steadfastly maintain that you are in the right here. That you have no idea why your wife is leaving you, that this has happened all of a sudden. And, most important, that all you want is what's best for your son. Since your wife has not been acting stably by just leaving and making false claims, you believe that, right now, the best place for your son is with you.
anglynn
Sep 18, 2010, 09:49 AM
You may get it thrown out. If there is no evidence at all, the judge may not buy it. I just wanted to prepare you that even if you do lose this round its not the end of the war. As long as you go into this for the long haul and realize that, you will be able to approach this more calmly. The most important thing is to steadfastly maintain that you are in the right here. That you have no idea why your wife is leaving you, that this has happened all of a sudden. And, most important, that all you want is what's best for your son. Since your wife has not been acting stably by just leaving and making false claims, you believe that, right now, the best place for your son is with you.
Thank you again I am just so worried She is bi-poler and has ADD and ADHD and I found all this out AFTER we got married that's one of the reasons we moved in with my parents when we found out she was pregnant This is the manipulation that I posted about earlier she wants to move out of my parents place but I know that my son is safe while I am at work and I wasn't taking him from her so as far as I believed it was a win win situation. Thank you for your advice and I am in it for the long haul as you can see the divorce take second place to my child's safety I just miss him and want him back