My parents separated when I was really little and ever since it has always been only my mother and I. We have been so close over the years and have had great connection and communication.
We have been there for each other through thick and thin. For the past months, maybe even over a year, I feel that our communication has decreased. Certain things I feel that I cannot talk to my mother because she always seems to take it into a different direction and doesn't stay on topic. I have always listened to my mom on everything and have kept my own personal problems and feelings to myself because I didn't want to burden her with them since she has gone through enough. I've adapted to it and have kept it that way for quite a while. Always placing her feelings first above mine. Certain events have happened (not huge), but certain things that would affect you emotionally. I have a huge heart and have tried to learn to deal with them on my own. I have kept so much inside for such a long time that I have acknowledged on my own and told my boyfriend that I might have depression.
I confide in him so much and consider him as my best friend. Whenever I'm not good, he's the one I turn to and just let everything out. I can talk to him about anything as he can with me.
For the past month or so, my mother has been having issues with my boyfriend. Don't want to go into details, but I can say that he has such a huge heart and it's so hard for people to see that. We all have defects as I admit my own... but above all that, he has always respected my mother and values family very much.
Whenever I talk with my mother, she always seems to bring up my boyfriend as an excuse for everything in relation to what I feel and think. I can say that it's absolutely not true. I have my own opinions, feelings, and ideas in which I'm not afraid to share with my mother and don't disrespect her when I do. I consider myself a mature adult since had to grow up faster than most other children. Anything I say to my mother, she takes it the wrong way and blames my boyfriend. This has made me close myself up even more into wanting to ever communicate with my mother.
For example, today, we talked that my main focus and goal at the moment is studying towards my Master's degree. She's wanting to move back to her country and I want to stay in the U.S. to achieve my goal. She wants me to move to her country to have a better life, but at the moment this is what I want. I don't know what the future may bring. She has her goal, and I have mine. With this, she states that I want to stay because of my boyfriend. I have wanted to achieve this even before I met him. I got really upset and have told her that anything we talk about she brings him as an excuse. Even when it comes to my feelings, opinions, and ideas she does the same. Then she always asks if I love him. Honestly, from the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with him. Can I tell her this? No, because she will take it to another direction. Can I tell her that I want to create a future with him? That he has made me dream of more possibilities than I ever thought of? That he makes me feel to actually have children and a family? He has made me want to love again when I never wanted to feel it again. He has impacted my life so much and has made me see that life can be beautiful. I never thought of those things because I didn't want them. But since I met him, he has made me dream so much and we share the same thing. I can never tell my mother that.
I feel so sad because I know if I do, then things would not turn well. I understand that I'm her only child and she cares for me so much... but sometimes it's just too much and the more I keep these things inside, the more it hurts me. I feel like I'm in the middle and cannot communicate with her without her mentioning my boyfriend on everything. Why can't she understand that this is actually who I am and maybe this is actually what I think?
What can I do in order to have my mom actually listen to me? I'm completely stuck in the middle between my mother who I love dearly and the love of my life who has made me dream and shown me that life is worth living. I feel that I cannot talk to her and has shut me up for such a long time. I feel so tired and my heart breaks every time.

The problems you are having with your mom sounds like it could be due to your mom realizing that soon her "little girl" will be gone. Especially an only child.

That could be why she turned cold on your boyfriend, she is putting the blame on him.

And if you have established a pattern of not talking to your mom about your issues ,and listening to her and putting her feelings above yours , she seems to be following that pattern you two have established now.

I can understand , to an extent , that realizing your children are adults and will be going off their own is an awakening on several levels.
You feel older,
You realize how fast the time has gone by and regret all the things you missed doing with them.
It can be a depressing time if you let it be. And she is having trouble dealing with it is my guess.

I think the biggest problem is your mom trying to deal with the inevitable loss of her baby.

Keep this in mind and do all you can to communicate with her and let her know how happy your boyfriend makes you, and how sad it will be to be leaving her when you decide to get married... there is a pretty opener for the conversation I think.

And I also think that if she has a chance to talk to you and you can make her understand you need to secure your happiness, like she did when she left home.

I wish you well

I am not sure how old you are, but I presume that your mother supports you, and you live at home.

You have not said why she dislikes your boyfriend. You have said, quite clearly, how her disliking him, causes problems between the two of you, but, what is the problem she has with him. Is it a series of things, or one incident, or did she start not liking him? Do you think that there is jealousy between them?

You say that you talk and confide less in your mother. I presume that you are old enough to realize that at some point while you become more and more independent, you share less of everyday problems with a parent, because you should be mature enough to handle them on your own. Is your father in the picture? How does he get on with your boyfriend, and what does he say about him.

You are obviously old enough, if you are considering a masters degree, to call your own shots, and I have to wonder where all these problems come from. You don't say that your mother has forbidden you from seeing your boyfriend, and she is not forcing you against your will to move to another country. Maybe she is expecting that it is you that is not able to rely on her less, and on yourself more.

She could be worried that you are not yet ready to be on your own- could that be why she wants you to go with her if she moves?

Everything you have written revolves around your boyfriend, and I have to wonder, if he is such a positive person in your life with all the glowing attribues you bestow upon him, why doesn't your mother approve of him.

I'm thinking that the problem is him, but without more information on his more human qualities to include the bad, as well as the good about him, it seems to be a very one-sided situation with your mother being totally at fault.

I'm 23 years old, but do to our life and the experiences we've faced, I can say that I feel older than that. As I stated, we've been together for a year. She's liked him from the start and never complained or said anything bad about him. She's always told me that she sees him as a son and that he has a nice heart.
Mother's can usually tell off from the bat about a person and use their instinct. Towards him, it has always been positive. Recently for the past two months it has been negative to the point that she wanted me to break it off with him and doesn't agree with the relationship. She states she feels different now, but she knows that I care about him.
She even talked with him and stated that even though she doesn't agree, she knows I won't leave him because she says that I care about him. My boyfriend is like my mother. They are both direct and she's stated to me that she can notice he may have a temper. It's true, but he only uses it towards people that deserve it and disrespect him. With me and my family, never. And I have never felt endangered from him. He's never disrespected her and she knows perfectly well that he can protect me and he stated the same with her.
During 4th of July, he had a problem with his cousin because he was giving him attitude not knowing why and of course that made him mad. You could notice a little he was upset, but he doesn't like to show that to others and still respected me and my mother. But sometimes you can't help if you have some off days, which is normal, but it's your choice if you're going to show it to the whole world. My mom noticed a bit that he was and I explained to her. Ever since, things changed to what she feels now. I've mentioned to her that I can also have a temper and not everyone is perfect and my mother has a temper as well. She states she sees a lot of her in him, but takes it towards a negative perspective. I've told her that doesn't make a person bad.
My boyfriend has been able to control his temper, but I can honestly say that I'm not very good at it myself and sometimes have noticed I've gotten that from my mother and feel bad when I have used it towards my boyfriend. I'm Taurus, what can I say about that.
My boyfriend and I talked, and we both felt that she's so focused on whether we love each other and about marriage. She doesn't focus on the present time that he makes me happy.
And no, my father is not in the picture. Different story there. He has done so much for me and even things that my mom doesn't know about, but she has seen. He lives almost 2 hrs away, and practically every weekend he would drive all the way to see me even if it was only for a few hours. Even miss his classes and surprise me at school. He's always wanted to do anything that makes me happy and sometimes I've taken it for granted. But above everything, he has always been there even when I felt that he shouldn't because any other person would have gotten tired. So, I'm not perfect myself and feel blessed to have him in my life.

I also want to state that I feel my mother sets so many expectations of me that when my feelings or thinking becomes different from hers, then she begins to question and blames my boyfriend. My goals can never be the same as hers and has to realize that sooner or later I will have to make my own life. I will never abandon my mother as she has stated, and want to help her in any way possible. Just because I'm with someone, doesn't mean I don't love her anymore.
Sometimes she's stated that she gets jealous, but not in a bad way. Meaning, that she wants us to do things together as before. She's will an insecure and possesive fiancée and makes an excuse to him whenever she would hang with me. Always got me upset that she never said "i will be with my daughter today". She would be with him more and I would just be there and sometimes alone in my room. But I was happy for her when things were good. Now that I have a boyfriend, of course I be with him. When I'm not, I'm at home and usually in my room because I don't like her fiancée anymore and she knows that and she feels the same. So I avoid him as my as I can. But even when I'm at home, she doesn't really spend quality time with me.
This vacation together, she has been happy being just us and spending time together. But, I felt that yesterday was bringing all of that again and it made me upset. It was my bf's birthday yesterday. While we've been here, she's asked about him and says to tell him hi. Yesterday, was all negative again. And when we left, he surprised me at the airport and before we both cryed because I don't know when I'll be back. Could be from 1-4 months. He states that no matter how long, he will be there waiting for me.
My mother thinks that I'll be with people like the ones she was with. So far, I have been fortunate that all of my bf's have treated me with respect. Our breaking ups, always consisted of different reasons.
I've backed my mother up in everything and I back her up in moving to her country. If that makes her happy, then go ahead. Doesn't mean I will abandon her or want to get rid of her as she states. I will always be there for my mother. But sometimes I feel she has to let me go and not be so "controlling" over me especially if I feel or think different than her.