I have had problems with depression throughout my life and believe I am in my worst state of depression now. I am 28, turning 29 on Tuesday, and recently came out of a 6 year relationship about two months. I have always felt that my happiness has been dependent on other people's positive feelings about me. My ex-boyfriend was never a healthy person for me to be with but he would give attention, which is why I stayed in the relationship. Throughout our entire relationship, he lied to me and had several affairs with other women but I didn't leave or felt like I couldn't leave him.

I have a very strained relationship with my small immediate family and have grown very distant from any friends during my relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I do not feel like living by myself is good for me because it allows me not go anywhere or see anyone. I have little to no interest in leaving my apartment most of the time and I work primarily from home for my job.

I have been having many more feelings of overwhelming sadness, cry frequently, and am generally frozen emotionally and physically. I feel incapable in taking any steps towards dealing with my emotional issues. I honesly do not know what to do right now and that type of mindset is getting to be an almost every day thing. I have lost a sense of feeling like I can find ways to change the way I think and that this is just the way I am. It's circular problem - I don't feel like I can change the way that I think so I don't see the point of trying. I guess I have not completely bought into this mindset because I'm writing this question but know that if I am going to do something it has to be right now.

Have you considered getting professional help? A counselor can help you work through this, and if deemed necessary get you started on antidepressants until you are able to make some progress.

Yes I have tried a couple different therapists but it really didn't much of an effect

I think that therapy only works if you are willing to do the homework. Another words, certain tasks will be suggested to you, and you have to execute those between your therapy sessions. Exercising is also an excellent activity to relieve anxiety. There are also support groups that are available. The most important thing for you to do is to build up yourself esteem. You are right, you have to do something about this now. You have to want to get better before you can get better. Don't wait for somebody to come along to give you a reason to live. You have to start living for yourself, and taking care of yourself. Once you reach that point, your relationships will be much healthier and satisfying.

yes i have tried a couple different therapists but it really didn't much of an effect

You only get out what you put in with therapy.

When,exactly,did you try this therapy?Recently or sometime in the past?How many appointments?

With depression,that which a qualified professional could assess,there are a variety of treatments.Are you willing to do what is necessary to get the relief you are looking for?

Having an open mind when you walk in the door to a therapy session is a good first step.Keeping that open mind helps when you walk OUT that door.

If you don't take a therapists advice,who's advice will you take?Mine?I am not a therapist,I am one of those people from the same side of the desk as you would be, a client/patient,etc.

If you want out of the chaos you are calling a life today,get the help you need,we can't help you if you don't first help yourself.